chapter one; the beginning

Seunghyun didn’t like sleeping. It was the sort of thing where he wouldn’t do it until he absolutely needed to and then he would end up unable to wake up in the morning.

With his intense dislike of sleeping, Seunghyun would often stay up until odd hours into the night doing random things like watching a movie, cartoons, or talk shows. He would always do so in the privacy of his bedroom, so no one knew of his refusal to go to asleep.

But everyone knew of his refusal to wake up in the morning.

With his sleeping habits, it was inevitable Seunghyun would discover Seungri’s sleeping habits as well.

***

Seunghyun had been binge watching Running Man for the past hours when he was suddenly aware of how hungry he was.

It was a habit Seunghyun had been trying very hard to cut – eating in the middle of the night, a sure fire way to gain weight. He tried to ignore the insistent call of his stomach, but after his stomach growled for the third time in fifteen minutes, he gave up and slammed his laptop shut.

He walked out of his room, expecting everyone to be asleep, only to see Seungri sitting on the couch with his legs crossed. Seungri’s laptop was on his lap, headphones on, fully engrossed in whatever he was watching.

The light of the computer lit up Seungri’s face, emphasizing the dark circles beneath his eyes.

It took a moment for Seungri to notice Seunghyun and when he did, he jolted, taking off his headphones.

“Hyung! Aren’t you supposed to be asleep?” Seunghyun raised an eyebrow.

“Aren’t you supposed to be asleep?” Seungri ducked his head.

“I can’t sleep,” he muttered. 

“This happen often?”

“Yeah,” Seungri admitted, albeit reluctantly. Seunghyun sighed, making his way towards Seungri. “Can you sleep?” Seunghyun shrugged.

“I don’t like sleeping.” Seungri glared at him.

“Is that why you can’t wake up in the morning?” he asked. Seunghyun gave Seungri a guilty smile. When he got up to go back to his room, Seungri pulled him back.

The glow of the laptop lighting up Seungri’s wide eyes made him look young and vulnerable.

“Stay?” he asked and Seunghyun couldn’t deny him. They sat together, and eventually, Seunghyun fell asleep on Seungri’s shoulder.

He woke up the next morning and lifted his head to see Seungri still asleep. The lift of weight off his shoulder caused Seungri to stir and he opened his eyes to see Seunghyun, offering him a small smile.

***

Youngbae’s brother had always had trouble sleeping. It was a thing that ran in the family; Youngbae’s grandfather also had trouble sleeping, as did his mother. So he grew up learning the signs of sleep deprivation and being eternally grateful that he himself did not suffer from such a disorder.

When Youngbae first laid eyes on Seungri, he knew the boy was the same as his mother and brother.

Youngbae recognized the signs. He recognized the way Seungri seemed to completely tune out of conversations once in a while, eat a ton of food whenever they were presented with it, act impulsively, trip over random things (or nothing at all) and just forget things every so often.

And of course, the dark circles.

He could also see Jiyong’s complete frustration with the boy. Youngbae couldn’t say anything about it, because he knew Seungri would prefer to keep such a thing quiet.

Seungri, Youngbae had to admit, was amazing at hiding just how tired he was. It was something Youngbae’s brother never managed to do (Youngbae was used to grumpy people in the household), so Youngbae had a respect for Seungri he knew Jiyong would never understand.

***

Youngbae happy pretending he didn’t know that Seungri didn’t sleep at night. That was, until one night, when Youngbae got back from a very late photoshoot.

He walked in to see Seungri curled up in a ball on the couch looking on the verge of tears. Youngbae didn’t say anything, immediately making his way to kitchen. He quickly made a cup of tea before going back to Seungri.

He gently shook the boy on the shoulder and watched as Seungri looked up at him, his eyes shining in unshed tears. Youngbae held the cup out.

“Here,” he said. “It always helped my brother sleep.” Seungri stared at the cup for a long moment before hesitantly accepting it.

“Thank you,” Seungri said. Youngbae watched as Seungri took a sip. “Your brother?”

“Insomnia runs in my family,” Youngbae said. “So I figured.”

“I don’t have insomnia,” Seungri muttered. “I just have trouble sleeping.” Youngbae didn’t say anything, sitting next to Seungri. He watched as Seungri’s eyes drifted shut and gently took the cup from the boy’s hand.

He smiled slightly as he put the cup into the sink and turned off the lights in the living room.

***

Initially, Daesung didn’t want to room with Seungri. Seungri seemed like his complete opposite of him – loud and crass -- and Daesung couldn’t help but think that if he was forced to spend long periods of time with Seungri, he would actually lose his mind.

He was pleasantly surprised to find that Seungri was quite subdued at night, falling almost silent when they were in the room together, save for an occasional bid of ‘goodnight’ or to ask him where something was to be placed in the room. It was as if Seungri was like a deflated balloon, all the energy used up during the day, leaving a quiet boy at night.

Daesung wasn’t complaining. It was a nice change. He didn’t notice anything wrong.

But of course, it didn’t take long for Daesung learn of Seungri’s sleeping habits. They shared a room, after all.

*