Jin met Namjoon in high school. He just moved schools - he dropped out of the other one because he just didn't like it there - and started his high school life from zero again - although he knew he'd be dropped by one year.

Jin wasn't the most social when he's the 'new guy' and he spent his first recess with his phone. That was when Namjoon approached him.

"Yo new kid, the school's pretty tough on newcomers. They try to implement their rules on kids like you, so whatever you do, don't get caught."

From then on, Jin started going to Namjoon's seat - because Namjoon was the only one he knew. They grew closer by days. From talking every day Jin knew Namjoon was a genius and had come up one year because of it. From there Jin knew they had the same taste in music.

They grew closer. 'Ahh it's him again' turned to 'there he is!’, and awkward obligated laughs turned to tugging of hands.

Days turned to months. Jin was a pretty boy, an instant heartthrob among the girls. He dated one, and Namjoon wasn't very happy. All he said about the girl was just, "Break up with her."

Jin eventually did and he didn't mind at all. He didn't know what Namjoon knew. The girl was only using Jin to get words out that she's dating the hottest guy in school, when she didn't really like him, and only walked arm in arm so everybody could see that she's getting home with him.

A year went by. They grew closer and touchier. Constant joking soft slaps and chasing games with wrestling at the end were a norm.

Namjoon didn't notice Jin's tender stares; he didn't notice Jin had fell for him.

Then Namjoon had to move to America.

All Jin said was "Get back home and give me merch!"

But he never did come back home.

Months went by, nothing from Jin. Namjoon thought maybe Jin forgot about him already, so he didn't try to contact him.

Until his birthday.

"NAMJOONIE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"

Namjoon sighed fondly at his phone, "So he does remember."

Years went by, and their contacts were just on their birthdays. Above all, what Namjoon regretted most was that they had the platform to interact, and yet neither initiated.

Namjoon didn't stop looking at Jin though; he kept track of him. He found out how much closer Jin was to his dream of becoming a singer, and give him silent advises - by posting things Jin might need on social media. Namjoon was content, at least he's there helping.

Four, six, eight years went by. Jin became a successful singer he always wanted to be, and Namjoon became the producer he dreamed to be. But none had initiated an interaction.

Namjoon just looked from afar, smiling at his phone while watching Jin on stage. Then he laughed at the fan chants.

Then one day in their ninth year apart, Namjoon was invited over back to Korea for Jin's wedding. So he flew back.

The wedding wasn't extravagant. Everything was just enough and perfect.

Then Namjoon saw Jin with his own eyes, for the first time in nine years.

"Ah, Namjoon!"

Oh how Namjoon wished he could tell Jin how much he missed him.

"I didn't know you'd actually come."

Jin looked at Namjoon with warm teary eyes. He had imagined their reunion, he made up numerous scenarios, but none was like this.

They went to the men only after-party. Each gulped down alcohols in an attempt to slow down their heartbeat.

Namjoon wanted to tell Jin how much he regretted not being able to stay beside him; Jin wanted to tell Namjoom how useful his shares were.

They gulped another shots.

Namjoon wanted to tell Jin how much he missed seeing those sparkly eyes of his; Jin wanted to tell Namjoon how cute those dimples are.

They gulped another.

Namjoon wanted to tell Jin how he fell for him during those high school days; Jin wanted to tell Namjoon how hard he cried the night Namjoon went on the plane.

They gulped another.

Namjoon wanted to tell Jin how he could've been the one on the altar; Jin wanted to tell him how his supposedly plan for the future became the worst decision he ever made.

They gulped another, and opted to go home together then.

Namjoon took Jin by the arm, and straddled it with his own. Jin looked at him, too surprised to say anything.

He wanted words to go out that he's dating the hottest guy in the industry, he loved him, and purposely walked arm in arm so everybody could see he's getting home with him.

But he can't. They aren't dating. They're far from it.

Both boys weren't true to themselves, and as a result they suffered immensely. Saying they must forget the other and lived painfully without each other.

But both boys were greedy. They didn't want to lose the other. No more.

And both boys were tired. They played the game for nine years long, and they didn't want it anymore.

Both knew it was going to be the worst act they ever committed, but none was willing to back out.

The thoughts were wrong, and the act was sinful. But both boys wanted it, and that's all they ever wanted.

"For tonight, just for tonight. Let's blame it on the alcohol."