You downed your beer as you took in the sight in front of you. Kihyun with his girlfriend. You met Kihyun freshman year of college. From that faithful day on you guys become close friends. Throughout the years of friendship you fell in love with him. You never had the guts to say anything. You settled on being just his friend which meant that he constantly turned to you for advice about girls. You hated helping him woo a girl but you couldn’t tell him no or the reason why you didn’t want to help him. Kihyun dated here and there but never had a serious girlfriend until now. The day he introduced you to his girlfriend was the day your heart shattered into pieces. You never felt so much pain before. Once you were alone in your apartment you let the tears that you’ve been holding in fall freely. You cried your heart out but no matter how much you cried the pain in your heart did not go away. That night you cried yourself to sleep. When you woke up you knew you had to distant yourself from Kihyun.

Whenever Kihyun called or texted you to hangout you would make up some excuse to not go. Even though you did not see him the pain in your heart did not lessen. In front of your other friends you seemed fine but once you were alone tears would start falling. You wanted the pain to go away so bad but it didn’t. It was as if your heart was bruised. You just wanted to be ok again.

After several weeks you found yourself crying less. You thought you were on your way in getting over Kihyun. How wrong you were. You agree to have drinks with your friends. You did not know that Kihyun and his girlfriend were going to go as well. The moment you saw them you felt like a truck had just run you over. You couldn’t leave since that would make you suspicious. So that’s how you found yourself sitting in front of Kihyun and his girlfriend.

You drank so that you can numb your heart but it didn’t work. You found yourself still hurting and getting tipsy which you knew is a bad combination. You told everyone you are heading home first. You get up to leave but Kihyun grabs your arm.

“I can drive you home.” He offered but you knew being in an enclosed space with him would be bad.

“No I will take a taxi.” You flung his hand away and quickly left the bar. You stumble outside and tried to hail for a taxi. To your luck a taxi pulls up but just as you open the door to get in someone pulls you back. You turn to see Kihyun.

“Sorry ajussi. She doesn’t need a taxi.” Kihyun closed the door and let the taxi drive off.

“What the hell Kihyun” You yelled.

“I will drive you home.” Kihyun grabs your arm and start dragging you to his car. You fling his hand away again and you saw the hurt on his face but the hurt he is feeling is nothing compared what you’ve been feeling.

“No I don’t want you to drive me home.” You stated while trying to hail another taxi

“What is wrong? Did I do something to make you mad? Why have you been avoiding me? What can I do to fix this?” Kihyun bombards you with question
You felt tears threatening to fall. You had to leave asap. You didn’t want Kihyun to see you crying. A taxi pulls up and you quickly get in. You roll down the window and tell Kihyun “I just need time.” Kihyun looked confused as the taxi pulled away. The tears you were holding in rolls freely down your face.

When you got home you quickly pack up some clothes. You had to get out of town. You needed time away. After you packed your clothes you left your apartment and went to the train station. You are going to your sister’s house. She lives a few hours away. You knew she is going to kill you for showing up unannounced and in the middle of the night but you didn’t care. During the train ride your phone blew up with text messages from your friends and Kihyun.

What happened with you and Kihyun? He came back in mad after he ran after you- Hyunwon

Did you and Kihyun get into a fight?- Jooheon

At least let me know when you get home safe - Kihyun

Are you home yet? – Kihyun

Answer my call – Kihyun

I’m coming over- Kihyun

You stopped reading your text messages and turned your phone on do not disturb. You knew you were being childish in not texting or calling Kihyun back but at this moment you didn’t care. A part you wanted him to worry about you. After arriving to your sister’s house you rang the doorbell and waited. When your sister and her husband opened the door you ran and hugged your sister.

“Yah what are you doing here in the middle of night?” You hear your sister ask

“Unnie.” Was all you were able to get out while you choked back a sob. Your sister knew something must have happened for you to come crying to her in the middle of the night

“Let’s go inside” Your sister brings you to the guestroom. After calming down you told your sister what happened.

“You can stay here but what about work?”

“I will call in sick. I just need a few days to clear my head.” You tell your sister. Your sister let you get some sleep. You were quite exhausted and fell asleep quickly. The next few days went by. Being at your sister’s house took Kihyun off your mind. You niece and sister kept you distracted but you knew you had to face the music when you get back. During the course of three days Kihyun continually called and texted you but you ignore them all.

On the train ride back you decided to be truthful to Kihyun. There was no way around it. Once he knows the truth he will give you the space that you need to get over him.
As you got out of the elevator to your apartment you did not expect to see Kihyun sitting in front of your door. He turns to your direction when he heard noise from the elevator. His eyes sunken in from lack of sleep and his clothes all wrinkled.

“Where the hell have you been?” He yells at you as he gets up and makes his way to you

“Kihyun ah.” Was all you were able to get out as he grabs and hugs you.

“Do you know how worried I’ve been? I looked everywhere for you. I called everyone that we knew. I almost called the police if it wasn’t for your job telling me you called in sick.” You felt guilty as you listened on.

“Let’s go inside first and we will talk.” You felt a lump in your throat as tears began to well up in your eyes. You take deep breaths to make it go away as you and Kihyun stepped into your apartment.

“Please tell me what’s been going on with you. Is there something I can do to help you? And what did you mean the other night when you said you needed space?” Kihyun calms down as he sees the tears in your eyes.

You bring Kihyun to the living room and have him sit down before you confess to him.

“I’m sorry for making you worry.” This is going to be much harder than you thought.

You took a deep breath before continuing “I am in love with you and I know you don’t feel the same. I just need time for me to sort my feelings. So please give me space and when I am ready to be just your friend I will come to you.”

Kihyun looked shock but you expected it but what he said next came to a shock to you.

“No I can’t do that.”

You looked at Kihyun confused but Kihyun continued on with determination on his face

“These past three days were hell for me. I thought something happened to you. I was going crazy not knowing where you were or whether you were ok or not. In the past three days I realized you mean more to me than anyone else”

Your heart rate increased as you listened “but what about your girlfriend?” you asked

“We broke up. I was so distraught the night you refused to let me drive you home when you didn’t answer my text and my calls. So when I left to go to your apartment she made me choose between you and her. Without hesitation I chose you” Kihyun slowly closed the gap between you two and took your hands into his.

“But she was your first serious girlfriend since I met you.”

“I thought she was someone who I could be with but it all changed when I thought something bad had happened to you. When you avoided hanging out with me I was sad but I gave you space but when I thought I would never see you again my heart broke.”

You felt like you were dreaming. You looked into Kihyun’s eyes and saw the sincerity in his eyes

“I love you. I’m sorry for not realizing it sooner. I’m sorry for putting you through so much pain. I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you. Can we please give this a try?” Kihyun asked

You couldn’t find the words to say so you nodded. Kihyun smiles and leans in. Your breath hitches as his lips come into contact with yours. It is a short but sweet kiss. However being so close to Kihyun you can smell that he hasn’t showered in days. You scrunched your nose.

“Not to ruin the moment but you need to shower”

Kihyun playfully glares at you before standing up.

“It’s because of certain someone that I haven’t showered in days. I’m going to take a shower here then. You still have some of my clothes that you borrowed right?” Kihyun asked

“Yeah” You had the habit of taking Kihyun’s clothes because they are bigger, more comfortable, and smelled like him. Even his sweat pants were comfortable

Kihyun walks to your bathroom but you realize that you don’t have the one thing he will need once out of the shower. “Ya I don’t have any of your underwear though”

“That’s fine. I will go without it” Kihyun said nonchalantly as he closed the bathroom door. You knew Kihyun would want to sleep here so you went and got your bed ready for him. After Kihyun was done showering he walked into your room with just a towel over his waist. You blush but did not say anything about it. You told him where his clothes are and left the room. After a few minutes you hear Kihyun call your name. You walked back into your room to find him dressed and under the blankets.

“Take a nap with me.” Kihyun requested. You don’t hesitate to get into bed. You lay your head on his chest with your arm across his torso.

“I can get used to this.” You hear Kihyun say. After a few minutes you hear Kihyun snoring softly. You turn your head so you can see his face. You kiss him softly on the cheeks and whisper to him “I can get used to this too.”