It was the typical Saturday evening for everyone, but it was extra special for Adreanne. She just came out of the bathroom, body wrapped with a bathrobe. Glancing at the clock, she knew that she still had time to get ready properly, but Taemin was always the one to get ready first. Well, he's a guy with an amazing sense of fashion, so Adreanne sometimes has to think so hard while rummaging through their shared wardrobe just to look decent around him.
 

Taemin lived in a world where his appearance was something that everyone cared about. People would try to steal his look while fashion experts would always praise and criticize his choice of clothing and accessories. And so, Adreanne wouldn't want him to be embarrassed for having a spouse that was only worthy of being a 'fashion victim'. Although before this she never cared, now that she's with him, she actually wants to look good, for his sake at least.

After putting on her underwear, she walked towards the walk-in-closet only to find a beautiful knee length gown hung beside the mirror. It must be him, she thought. She has never owned the dress before and figured that it must be something that he bought for her to wear that day.
 

She took the dress and laid it onto their king sized bed before walking in front of the vanity table to put on a light makeup and do her hair. Taemin loved it when she just curl the ends of her hair and put her long hair up on a simple ponytail, so she did that and stood in front of the full-length mirror in the room before stopping whatever she was doing abruptly.

Slowly, she took a step forward. She raised both of her hands and put them down her sides, looking at the jiggles of fat on her underarms. It was disgusting, she thought, as she kept shaking it, secretly hoping that it would disappear if she shook it long enough.

Thinking that it was stupid, she smiled sadly and rubbed her stomach. It was never flat. Sometimes she would look at Taemin's upper body whenever he was shirtless and told herself that it wasn't right that her husband's midriff was even smaller and definitely flatter than hers. Taemin's body was chiseled and beautiful, if he was a doll, then he must've been carved by the most talented person in the world.

In Adreanne's eyes, Taemin was beautiful. She thought that he was something ethereal. Not caring if she was stupid for thinking like a child, but she has actually thought of the possibility that Taemin might came from another realm where he was a fairy prince who fancied big things.

Big, huh?

That's how her friends and family members used to address her.

She still remembered vividly. She told Taemin to postpone their wedding so she could lose weight. Taemin was quite shocked, and quite upset probably, but he understood what she felt and just smiled at her. When she told her that she wanted to be slimmer, Taemin asked her a simple question; "Why?"

Her answer was simple. She wanted to be healthy. Just so she could take care of him properly until they grow old, and not be the one giving him problems later in life. Many things could possibly happen. Maybe she would be sick and he would have to take care of her, but he couldn't even pick her up properly. She didn't want that. She also timidly told him that he wanted to be beautiful, just for him.

When he heard that, he smiled and kissed her lips tenderly.

"Whatever you do, I'll support you with all my heart. No matter what will happen, even if you don't get to achieve your goals, just know that I'll still love you. Now that you decided on that, do the best, okay? I'll be rooting for you,"

With the help of Taemin's personal trainer, she managed to lose a lot of weight before her wedding, but still... In her eyes, she still look as 'huge' as she was before.

When Taemin picked her up and carried her bridal style out of the marriage venue, she could see people grimacing and making faces, as if she was too big for him, and he might not able to carry her properly. She cried that night too, but Taemin stopped the tears with his kisses.

She pinched the skin on her lower abdomen, then pulling her up a little, hopefully, to cover the fat there and probably make her figure look a little better when she puts her clothes on.

Her eyes trailed down, looking at her big thighs and strong calves. She used to play the bicycle a lot and the muscles she gained there made her legs look even bigger. Her thigh gap was non-existent; she checked. She would always wear short tights whenever she wear skirts and dresses, so she proceeded to take one from her wardrobe and put them on. If she didn't wear it, the friction between her inner thighs would cause irritation, sometimes it could be quite painful and it would make her feel even worse with herself.

She also thought that maybe the tights could make her thighs look at least a bit thinner, but nothing happened. So she could only sigh.

Her eyes then darted to her face. She didn't have small, sharp nose. She has chubby cheeks. Her chin was sharp; Taemin loved pinching it whenever she pouted and he would kiss it after that, and her eyes were probably the prettiest thing on her body. Adreanne actually liked her eyes and lips not because everyone else thought that it was her best features, but simply because she could see her husband clearly, and receive his sweet kisses with her heart shaped lips.

She then scanned her whole body again, feeling a tug in her gut. Her eyes started welling with tears, suddenly remembering the moment when Taemin threw her slimming pills out of their window.

"What is this, yeobo?" He asked, taking the bottle away from her hand before she could even protest. His smile faded when he read the label, then looking at her with an expression that she never saw. It was probably the disappointment, she guessed.

Adreanne stood up, trying to grab the bottle from his hand, but he won't let her. He rushed towards the window, opened it and poured all the contents out before throwing the bottle as far as he could.

"Why did you do that?” She shouted.

“Are you stupid?” He yelled back, face red with anger. "Didn't you see the news? That same exact product almost killed someone!"

He walked to her and hugged her as tight as he could after he calmed down, whispering a faint "I don't want to lose you" repeatedly before being pushed away by a crying Adreanne.

"You don't understand me," She yelled. "I want to feel beautiful too!" She shouted incoherently.

"I'm so tired of hearing people call me fat, everywhere. I feel bad for you when your fans said that you're stupid for marrying such an ugly woman." She continued, tears streaming down her face like an endless waterfall.

"Yeobo, I know and I understand what you are-"

"You don't know anything!" There was a dramatic pause. Taemin stared at his wife, shocked.

" I try so hard, Taemin! I try so hard. The whole world already know that I was obese! And I feel sorry for you because people found my old pictures and you had to deal with the secondhand embarrassment. I lost weight now but I am still fat. We all know that." She stopped, wiping her tears with the end of her sleeve.

"I am still heavier than you. I will never be beautiful enough. And these stretch marks," She sobbed while pulling her oversized sweater down her shoulder a little to reveal white stripes that resembled a tiger's stripes on her skin, "Are never going away. They are ugly. And they are on my body, everywhere. You obviously don't understand. Because you don't have them," She continued, then sitting on the floor as she started to cry even harder.

Taemin slowly approached her, sat in front of her and kissed her lips until she finally responded back. And he did that repeatedly until she finally hugged him. She was certain that Taemin did say something, but she fell asleep while she was busy crying.

That night, she received a letter from him just before he left for a recording overseas.

"Dear Adreanne,

I am so sorry for everything. All of these negative things said to you won't exist if you weren't married to me. I felt bad saying that too, I am sorry. Not because I regret marrying you, but just because I love you a little too much that it hurts me to death too whenever I see people saying bad things about you.

I wish I could turn back time and not be an idol, Adreanne. Then only we could meet and I would fall in love with you all over again and I can feel all the things I went through just to really make you believe that I really do love you with my whole heart, with my entire being, without you thinking that I am just playing on you. Good times. It was hard, but it was worth the effort. I really love you, and I couldn't afford the heartbreak if you ever answered no when I proposed to you.

Then only people will be quiet. Then only people won't care. That was what I thought. But then I learned from you that people made fun of you for your physique even when we didn't know each other.

When I heard that, I felt angry. But I was secretly happy too. If only they knew how precious and beautiful you are, honey, then you won't be mine now. They would chase you, probably even harder than what I did. And so I wish that only I can see your true self, beneath your beautiful curves and your contagious smiles. I admit that I am envious of the people who met you first before me. I am very thankful to god because I am the only person allowed to taste your sweetness, to feel every inch of your soft skin under my fingertips.

I'm so sorry for being insensitive. All I knew was I love you, and I wish that you would be even happier when you're finally mine. But I only brought you misery. 

I love you so much, Adreanne. I love you to the point that I gave you my last name to bear. Every time I see you, my heart feels like exploding. My mind spins and my stomach makes crazy twirls and turns. God, I just love you so much, and that hasn't changed at all.

I know that you're trying so hard to make yourself feel better (and prettier, you said; but I disagree because you are beautiful even if you didn't change anything) but please... Don't do anything dangerous. I am sorry for those pills... but I don't want you to be eating that kind of things anymore. They are dangerous. I beg you, yeobo. Please. No.

This might be a little uncomfortable for you to read, but hey, it's my thoughts, and I should let you hear this.

I undressed you with the lights open, Adreanne. And I still think that you are the most beautiful creation on earth. If I ever got the chance to do absolutely nothing for the rest of my life, I would spend it by kissing every inch of your body until I die and have zero regrets over my decision.

I love you the first time I laid my eyes upon you, and I still do.

I love you.

Lee Taemin.

"Yeobo? Can I come in?" Taemin's voice was heard as the door fluttered open. Adreanne who was busy letting her mind drift off was completely unaware of his presence. Taemin's hair was back to black again, her favourite colour on him. He was dressed in a simple 'V' neckline t-shirt, topped with a black blazer. He also sprayed her favourite perfume on him, wanting that night to be memorable as he only got a few days free before continuing with the preparation of SHINee's next Japanese album promotion again. Luckily he married her, who was always understanding and patient to wait for him to come home into her arms.

Taemin smiled softly as he leaned against the doorframe, then shaking his head as he walked towards his beloved wife.

"Ah!" She shrieked when Taemin sneaked his arms around her waist, his face on the crook of her neck. She looked at the carpeted floor instantly, feeling ashamed as she felt her cheeks burning. She could feel his breath down her neck, and it was making her even more embarrassed. He then pressed a light kiss on her shoulder as he made her turn around to face him.

"This again?" He said, referring to her negative thinking about her body. Adreanne only smiled and proceeded to take her dress from the bed when Taemin pulled her into his arms and kissed her forehead.

"You," he kissed her eyes.

"Are," he kissed her cheeks.

"Beautiful," He kissed her lips.

"And I love you," He whispered in her ear before kissing her on the lips again, then deepening the kiss.

"Now get dressed fast, or I'll have to cancel the dinner reservation tonight," He said as he fixed her bangs.

"Why?" She frowned. She knew that Taemin really liked the steak from the restaurant, and she too liked the food there. They haven't gone out for dinners like that for a while because of SHINee's world tour, so Adreanne really missed the moments.

"Because you look very y and I might not able to hold myself from-"

Adreanne shrieked, wore her bathrobe again and pushed Taemin out of the door.

"Out, now!" She said. Taemin laughed and chanted "Okay, okay" repeatedly.

Adreanne then put on her dress and stood in front of the mirror again, smiling.

"You're beautiful, and I love you," She repeated what Taemin said to her own reflection in the mirror, before smiling as sweetly as she could.

Love yourself, guys. <3

Uhuhu. Hehehe, hahaha, hihihi. xD