“ Fany-ah, what will you do this christmas? “ a soft voice started the conversation

“ Uhm.. I’ll only stay at home with my family. You? “ the girl with pink jacket answered the older girl that sat next to her.

“ Me too I guess, I won’t visit grandma this year. Hey, let’s celebrate christmas together? ”

“ sure! what if we go to namsan tower? “

“ Aniya.. it will be crowded since it’s holiday time. Better we spend the christmas day here. Let’s make a special gift for each other “ The older girl looked excited with her idea.

“ That’s nice, handmade gift will be precious “ Tiffany noded and smiled “ Hmm.. I will draw you as your present “

“ really? I want to look pretty in your drawing, okay?! “

“ nah, I will draw a monkey instead “ the younger girl teased.

“ Yah!!” the older girl yelled at the younger, they laughed because she knew that Tiffany only   “ I will make a song for you since that’s the only thing I can do “

“ a song? Waaaa... It’s nice taetae. Let’s promise “ Tiffany smiled looking at Taeyeon  

“ I promise “ Taeyeon smiled, her pinkie finger intertwined with Tiffany’s finger.

Friendship that they build for ten years still strong. They were perfect together. Some of their friends even thought that they were a couple. But oneday they had a big fight. Tiffany felt hurt because of Taeyeon’s words. Taeyeon didn’t mean to hurt Tiffany. It was a missunderstanding but Tiffany already hurted so bad. Since that day they didn’t talk to each other. Taeyeon was really sad because of their friendship broken. Taeyeon tried to apologize but Tiffany always avoided her, they just like a stranger in class. Eventho Tiffany felt hurt she missed Taeyeon but her pride kept her silent. Sometimes she saw Taeyeon spaced out in class and she noticed Taeyeon’s sad face when she walked passing Taeyeon. Inside She felt guilty for making Taeyeon sad.

“ Tiff, go make up with Taeyeon. Both of you are hurt. “ Ren whispered to Tiffany after Taeyeon walked across them

“ No Ren. I admit I’m hurt seeing her sad but I don’t feel like talking to her again “ Tiffany replied

“ you’ve been with her for 10 years. Everyone envies for your friendship. Do you want to end it? You told me that she is the only person that know you well. Are you ready to loose her as friend? “ Ren convinced Tiffany. She knew that Tiffany missed Taeyeon eventho Tiffany hide it.

“ I don’t know Jess. Maybe I still need time to heal “

“ Up to you Tiff, but don’t be too long. We never know what will happen “ Ren rubbed Tiffany’s back to comfort her. “ you know I’m here if you need someone to talk ” She smilled before leaving Tiffany. Tiffany sat on her chair looking at the school yard from the window. She saw Taeyeon walked to her home. Ren was right, she couldn’t loose Taeyeon as friend but she didn’t know how to tell Taeyeon. She spent about some minutes in the class alone before she decided to go home.

*****

Taeyeon headed to her room as soon as she arrived at home. Christmas was three days ahead, she remembered her promise to Tiffany so she locked her room and took a blank paper. She started composing the song. Everytime she felt the lyrics isn’t good she ripped the paper and started writing the new one. After two hours she came out from her room with bringing the paper. She headed down to the piano near the dinning room to make a melody for the song. It wasn’t hard to make the melody since Taeyeon is talented in music. 

Hmm fanny-ah I hope you like this song. I really miss you. I hope with this song we can back like before. She back to her room and took a photobook from the drawer. She looked at every picture of her and Tiffany. They always took pictures when they hung out or when they did silly things together. Those pictures now became very precious to her. She missed Tiffany so bad. Taeyeon took a pink bag and put the photobook and the lyrics inside it. She came out from her room hurriedly. She decided to talk to Tiffany and say sorry.

“ mom I’m going to Tiffany’s house. I will be back before dinner “ Taeyeon already left the house before her mom could reply.

It only took 10 minutes to reach Tiffany’s house. she rang the bell hoping that she could meet tiffany. But it was Mrs. Hwang who opened the door. Tiffany was going out with Ren to theatre. Taeyeon looked down, she was a bit disappointed that she couldn’t meet Tiffany.

“ Taeyeon-ah, go inside. It’s cold outside “ Mrs. Hwang asked Taeyeon to wait inside the house. Taeyeon was like her own daughter because Taeyeon often sleptover in Tiffany’s house.

“ aniya.. I already promised my mom to go home before dinner. I will call Tiffany later. Can you give this to Tiffany mom?  “ Taeyeon gave the pink bag to Mrs. Hwang.

“ ah yes I’ll give it to her once she gets home. Are you sure you don’t want to come in? I just finished making cookies. “

“ no, thank you. I have to go now. please take care “ Taeyeon bowwed before she left Tiffany’s house.

On her way home she kept thinking about their friendship. She convinced herself that her friendship will be back like it used to be. Taeyeon looked at her surounding, she could feel the love and warm on the people in the street. There was a man with his family, a girl with her friends, a boy with his girlfriend. They were looked so happy. Taeyeon smiled, she felt happy but also sad at the same time. Lately she's been spending her time in Mall, town park, or any crowded place to drive the emptiness out of her. She tried to have fun with other friends but inside she still felt lack and grieve. I'll be happy. I only need to wait for Tiffany back from the theatre and we will spend the christmas together. Yeah! Stay possitive Kim Taeyeon! She continued walking, crossing the street to get home.

“ Run! Run! Get out from the street! ” a man in front of her shouted. He waved his hand giving signal to Taeyeon to get out from the street but Taeyeon didn’t get what he meant. When she looked at her right side a car was coming to her. It was too late for her to avoid. Taeyeon fell on the street she wasn’t able to move her body. She felt her head was so hurt. She looked at the snow that fall from the night sky above her. It was beautiful but she could hear nothing. it was her last view she saw before her sight got darker.    

****

Tiffany and Ren headed to hospital immediately after they got a call from someone that use Taeyeon’s phone. They both entered the hospital room where Taeyeon got her medication. Tiffany shaked Taeyeon’s body tried to wake her up but Taeyeon still unmoved. She couldn’t believe Taeyeon laid in coma.

“ Yah Taetae!  Wake up. This isnt funny! Wake up now... I won’t forgive you unless you wake up now “ Tiffany shaked Taeyeon’s body, her tears fell on Taeyeon’s cheek.

“ Tiff.. calmed down. She’s in coma but she will wake up.. I’m sure “ Ren held Tiffany’s shoulder to calm her.

“ Tae-tae.. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t ignore you. I’m so sorry.. I miss you. Please wake up “

“ she is strong and I know she missed you too. She will wake up, just wait Tiff “ Ren’s heart ripped because her good friend laid down in hospital bed and Tiffany was so messed. She accompanied Tiffany staying in the hospital. Tiffany didn’t say a word, she only sat holding Taeyeon’s hand waiting her to wake up. Taeyeon’s family already in hospital and asked Tiffany to rest at home but she insisted to stay in hospital. She didn’t want to leave her best friend. Tiffany cried till finally asleep near Taeyeon’s hand.

“ miyoung, how’s Taeyeon? “ Tiffany’s mom asked her once she got home. Tiffany shaked her head. “ she still in coma “ Tiffany felt so weak, she spent two days crying at hospital. She didn’t eat anything since Taeyeon is in coma.

 “ go shower then rest, I will make you soup “

“ no need mom.. I’ll shower and take some clothes then I’ll back to hospital “ Tiffany walked to the bathroom to shower.

She plopped her body on her bed once she finished showering. She stared at the ceiling, her heart felt so hard. It feels like a big stone crashed her heart into pieces and she didn’t have any strength to escape. She shift her gaze to her desk and saw a pink bag was on it. Tiffany walked and took the bag. A big photobook got her attention, she opened the book carefully and she saw photos that remind her to Taeyeon. She wiped her tears and took a folded paper. Tears escaped from her eyes, those beautiful lines touched her heart. Every line of the song reminded her about her friendship and she realized how precious it was.

Guilty ate her up but Tiffany decided to fulfill her promise. She folded the paper and put it inside the photobook. She took her drawing pen and started sketching Taeyeon's face. Her mind was occupied only with Taeyeon. She thought about Taeyeon's face in every sketch of her pen. Guilty, fear, sadness, love, and also hope poured into the drawing. Once she finished she brought it and went to the hospital. Tiiffany put the drawing on a table near the window then she sat next to Taeyeon. She held Taeyeon’s hand and lean her head on the bed. She desperately waiting for Taeyeon to wake up and her mind played all the memories she had with Taeyeon.

“ hey wake up. Wake up “ a familiar voice wake her up. She rubbed her eyes and looked at the girl who talked to her.

“ sleepyhead.. how long will you sleep huh? Come on wake up fany-ah “ Tiffany still rubbing her eyes but then she could see a familiar face in front of her- face that she missed the most.

“ Tae-tae? “

“ yeah, who else? “ Taeyeon smiled. She could see a bright smile on Tiffany’s face “ you’ve been sleeping for hours on chair. Isn’t your back hurts? “

“ tae-tae... “ Tiffany hugged taeyeon immediately. She didn’t answer Taeyeon’s question. She tried her best not to cry in front of her bestfriend. “ I miss you so much tae “

“ aigoo.. you hug me too tight “ she chuckeled a bit, she was happy to meet her best friend again. “ I miss you too. Really miss you “

Tiffany loosen her hug, and sat on the bed in front of Taeyeon. She couldn’t take her eyes off from Taeyeon. Slowly her tears escaped from her eyes. She used her hands to cover her face.

“ I’m sorry Tae. I’m sorry for ignoring you “

“ no Tiff.. I should say sorry too. I should filter my words before I speak so I would't hurt you.. aish.. I’m really stupid. I’m sorry “ Taeyeon hugged her tightly. She felt relieved they no longer in fight anymore.

“ mom said you skipped your meals. Is that true? “ she released the hug, looked at Tiffany. Tiffany just nodded. She knew Taeyeon would scold her whenever she skipped her meals.

“ Yah! How many times I told you not to skip your meals no matter even your not in mood “ Tiffany just kept silent. She looked at the older girl scolding her. She missed being scold by Taeyeon. She missed get Taeyeon's attention. “ mianhae.. I’m worried about you so much and I lose my appetite “

“ aish.. jinja “ the older girl couldn’t say anything. She knew that Tiffany didn’t eat because of her. Taeyeon shift her gaze on the table next to her.

“ fany-ah is that your drawing? “ Taeyeon pointed at the drawing on the table.

“ yeah, I drew it for you. That’s your christmas gift from me “ Tiffany walked and took the drawing. She gave it to Taeyeon. Taeyeon looked very happy because Tiffany drew her beautiful.

“ Thanks fany-ah “ she kissed Tiffany’s cheek to thank her. Tiffany felt the big stone that crashed her heart already gone. It was all because of Taeyeon. Taeyeon was the reason for her pain and her happiness.

“ call the doctor! Hurry!.. please! “ Tiffany heard a familiar voice but she couldn’t find the who shouted. Then she heard some people talked or more like murmured.

“ get her out of here “ Tiffany felt her body shaked. “ Tiff.. we have to wait outside “ Ren voice took her back to the reality. She opened her eyes and she saw some people dressed with white uniform were busy preparing some medical tools. She shifted her gaze and looked at Taeyeon still sleeping. She didn’t know what’s going on until she saw a cardio monitor next to her. One horizontal line was steady and she heard beep sound came from it.

“ we need to make the heart beat back now “ a man with white uniorm ordered. Ren pulled her, dragging her to leave the room. She couldn’t see what they do to Taeyeon. She realized that Taeyeon was in critical condition and the conversation with Taeyeon before was just a dream.

“ what happened to her Jess? “

“ I don’t know. I was sitting while you’re sleeping next to her and suddenly her heart stops beating “ Ren explained while wipping the tears.

They waited for the doctor to come out. Tiffany sat in the floor leaning on hospital wall. She curled her knees and sobbed. Within her tears she prayed. She asked God to give another chance for Taeyeon.

“ I’m sorry. We already tried the best “ The doctor came out from the room with his sad face. He tapped Tiffany’s shoulder before leaving them.

Tiffany took her steps inside the room, tears couldn’t stop falling. She felt her world shattered when she saw taeyeon slept peacefuly. Tiffany shaked Taeyeon’s body, calling her name. She couldn’t accept that Taeyeon’s gone now. Ren was still outside, she was too weak to stand up. She just cried and felt numb. Someone that always stayed beside her, who listened to of her wishes and problems, someone that hugged her when she messed now slept forever.

Tiffany hugged Taeyeon in her embrace.. Tae.. thank you for coming to my dream. Thank you for forgiving me. Thank you for staying with me, for being my best friend. For always cheering me up, for always there when I need. I love you my friend. Tiffany leaned closer and kissed Taeyeon’s lips for the first and the last time. Tears and silence could tell the pain of loosing a best friend.

A day after Christmas they burried Taeyeon.

They used Tiffany’s drawing in the funeral day. Taeyeon smiled beautifully in that picture.

Author's note :

This is a short story I made for this Christmas. I made a friendship story because I'm not fine with my bff now.

She's my only bff I have. We never left each other but lately we're drifting apart. I really wish we can be back like the old times. I realized that our life become meaningful when we share it with others. The existance of others is the reason we have colorful life. so I hope you enjoy every moment you have with your friend/lover/family.

hmm.. anyway, I want to know what a best friend is? I'm glad if you can leave your opinion ^^