You Alone...
You Alone....Markjin Christmas Oneshot
Merry Christmas everyone!!! [Happy Holidays for anyone that doesn’t celebrate Christmas] Please enjoy this oneshot that finally has some sort of romantic ual stuff v.v (As in nothing) I’ll probably be taking a break from writing FanFiction so I can stay with my family for the holidays, so please be understanding ^^ Have a nice Christmas day~ <3
*Sigh* Mark drops his pencil, leaning back into his chair; staring out his window located ten stories above the floor. Ah... it’s raining. Mark closes his eyes as he listens to the soft patter of rain against his window. It seems like so long ago when I had someone to listen to the rain with me..
Mark stands up and grabs his jacket lying on his bed and stalks out of the small space he calls home. The halls to his small apartment are empty, the single light hanging from the ceiling turned off.
“I’m leaving.” Mark calls. Not like anyone is listening.
But there is. In that small apartment lives his mother and father as well as his little sister, but Mark is right; no one is listening.
Mark picks up the single umbrella leaning against the door- the nostalgic transparent wings, the white handle. Mark sighs for the nth time as he slips on his sneakers, ignoring the untied laces. Maybe things will be different today. A sliver of hope grows in Mark’s heart as he turns the metal knob leading into a hallway of darkness. Maybe just maybe. Mark walks out the white door, not looking back at the absence of warmth in his home.
As soon as Mark reaches the bottom steps of the stairs, he feels a weight lift on his shoulder; he can see outside from here. The glass walls separating him from the loud patter of rain. Mark walks, almost runs to the glass walls as he pushes metal handle so he can once again breathe.
Mark slowly takes a step forward onto the wet pavement, taking in a deep breath as he lets the drizzle of rain wet his hair. Ah... A feeling that Mark has harboured alone, not a soul to share it with. A feeling that sometimes the boy misses sharing with his parents.
A small smile forms on Mark’s face as his insides fill with an overwhelming happiness, his heart beating faster than if he had run a marathon. Mark opens up the umbrella, lifting it over his head as he relishes the patter the rain makes against the thin plastic.
He walks down the streets, clouds blocking the sunlight from lighting the pathways, but it’s not like there’s anyone walking anyways. Not because it’s raining, but because they no longer need to communicate, no longer needing to breathe in the fresh air or to smile amongst friends and family.
Mark walks slowly down the middle of a road, humming a song that is blocked out by the patter of rain. As Mark reaches a small coffee shop, he realizes the dryness accumulating in his throat. I should’ve had something to drink before I left.
Mark walks into the small shop, a small ring chiming from the bell above the door. The shop is free from any customers as well as any workers. This was a normal occurrence for Mark- workers having quit, employers unable to sell their stores to anyone; leaving the small city a ghost town.
I’ll just fetch myself a cup of coffee. Mark hops over the counter, pulling out drawers to find the equipment he requires. Cup, coffee beans, milk, sugar. Mark lays out the materials, can’t be too hard, right? Mark fiddles around with the machines and after a good twenty minutes he creates a decent cup of coffee.
Mark slowly lifts himself up onto the counter, sipping the scalding coffee that burns his throat. The burning sensation that warms his insides makes Mark think it was worth the twenty minutes of his life. Mark sits there, his feet swinging back and forth making thumping sounds against the wooden counter.
Maybe I should do this more often, even if it’s not raining. Mark had never seen a point in coming out unless it was to listen to the rain, but this small moment of success almost convinces Mark of more explorations outside his home.
*Ring* Mark’s head shoots up, eyes staring down the figure that had arrived in the desolate shop. Another person? Other than his family, Mark hadn’t seen another person in almost 7 months.
“Got another cup for me?”
Mark nearly spits out the coffee in his mouth, the boy stands there, his black hoodie and black jeans soaked through to his skin. Mark can only stare, his jaw gone slack in surprise.
“Well?” The boy walks forward, stepping closer to the counter where Mark rests.
“U-uhh, sure.” Mark stammers as he places the half empty cup of coffee on the counter, sliding down to grab more materials.
“So, it’s my first time seeing another person outside, well, outside and not wearing earphones.” He rest his arms on the counter as he gazes at Mark.
How can he act so calm then!?
“What’s your name? Mine’s Jinyoung.”
“Mark.” Mark mutters as he finishes his tenth attempt at the boy’s coffee.
“Why’re you outside?” The question is direct, Mark nearly spilling the cup of coffee in his hands. “It’s obvious that you don’t work here, and even if you are outside, you’re not wearing earphones.”
“I came out to escape my home.” Mark answers shortly, there was no way he was going to tell this kid about his real thoughts.
“Yeah, me too.” Jinyoung smiles, his eyes sparkling slightly. “How old are you?” Jinyoung hops onto the counter, running his hands through his wet hair.
“What are you, a detective?” Mark cracks a smile as he hands Jinyoung a cup of coffee.
“Thanks, and no, I’m not obviously.” Jinyoung grasps the cup of coffee with both of his hands, holding on tightly for warmth. “I’m just amazed.”
Mark hops onto the counter next to Jinyoung, their shoulders almost touching. “Amazed at what?”
“To find a person.” Jinyoung’s voice hushed to a whisper, Mark’s eyes opens wide.
“Do you live alone?”
Jinyoung flinches as though to answer Mark’s question. “I never had any parents, not any that I remember anyway.”
Mark stares at the young boy. He’s lived alone all his life? Although Mark also had to care for himself since he was ten, at least he had had the presence of what was supposed to be family. “I-I’m sorry.” Is all Mark can muster up in his mind, as he stares at his hands, head down.
“No, it’s okay, me stumbling across you today was like a miracle in itself.”
Mark looks up Jinyoung, the boy’s lips upturned into a smile, his eyes gleaming brightly. Mark can only smile back, the brightness and liveliness of the boy filling him with an unknown emotion.
The two sit beside each other, the silence not awkward, but comforting. They listen to the soft patter of rain, slightly blocked out by the sound of their own breathing.
“Do you live far from here?” Mark interrupts the silence, tilting his head sliding to Jinyoung’s side.
“I don’t know.” Jinyoung mutters under his breath.
“What do you mean?” Mark’s voice clearly showing confusion.
Jinyoung sighs. “I wouldn’t call that empty house my home, that eerie emptiness I feel opening the door every day, a place I don’t even feel safe in, that’s not a home is it?”
“That’s true.. I wouldn’t call my house a home either, my own family sits there as though they are dolls. I can’t remember the last time I had a proper conversation with them.” Mark answers, both of them staring straight forward at the empty wall of the small coffee shop. Another pause of silence. “Hey Jinyoung, you want to make this our home?” Mark is shocked at the words slipping through his own lips.
Jinyoung whips his head towards Mark, his eyes widened. “Are you serious?” Mark can only gaze into Jinyoung’s eyes, his own eyes opened wide. “Oh my god.” Jinyoung leans backward, gazing up to the ceiling of the shop.
“Do you not want to?” Mark asks after a good minute of silence.
“It’s not that, it’s just...I’m afraid.” Jinyoung whispers, not meeting Mark’s eyes.
“Afraid of what?” Mark continues to gaze at Jinyoung.
Jinyoung brings his legs up to his chest, hugging them tightly. “Afraid to find something to treasure.” These words shock Mark. “All my life, I’ve never had a single meaning to being alive. What does it feel like to have something important to you Mark?”
Memories flood through Mark’s mind, the times he spent with his family as a child as well as the crumbling of his heart as they grew apart. “Although it hurts to lose something or someone important to you, the memories you come to treasure makes everything worth it.” Mark looks to Jinyoung, the boy’s eyes wet. “Do you trust me Jinyoung?”
“If what I’m feeling right now is trust then yes.” Jinyoung smiles, wiping his wet eyes with his damp hoodie. “Let’s make this our home Mark.”
The words escaping Jinyoung makes Mark heart ache. To not know the feeling of trust or belonging, what has our world fallen to? “I’m going to head back to my place and pack, let’s meet here tomorrow?” Mark hops off the counter, throwing his empty cup into the trash.
“Yeah, let’s do that, tomorrow at six?” Jinyoung also hops off the counter, walking towards the entrance of the door.
“Ah wait Jinyoung, take the umbrella, I don’t want you to catch a cold.” Mark points to the transparent umbrella lying on the counter.
“Wait no, I can’t do that.” Jinyoung begins to protest.
“No point in trying to object, see you tomorrow.” Mark is already halfway out the door.
“Wait, Mark” Jinyoung calls out to Mark, and the boy turns his head around.
“Hm?”
“Thank you.” Jinyoung smiles brightly and Mark can feel his heart beat faster.
Mark smiles as he lifts his hand to wave and walks out of the coffee shop into the rain.
Mark stares up to the blank ceiling as he recalls the events of today, the rain still softly hitting his window. Jinyoung. Mark smiles to himself as he reminisces the warmth and colour radiating off the boy compared to the solemn dark and gray world they live in. Was our meeting simply a coincidence? Mark shrugs off the thought, wanting to believe that fate had somehow brought them together.
Mark lifts the covers of his bed over his head, wrapping himself in the warmth. Tomorrow, I’m leaving this place, for a new home. Although the apartment is dull and void of life, Mark can remember clearly when there was; when there was laughter and joy filling the air. It makes Mark’s heart ache when he sees the blank faces on his family each morning.
Mark turns over so his face is engulfed by his pillow. I should sleep. Mark closes his eyes and welcomes the darkness; his heart awaiting a new adventure.
He should be here by now.. Mark sits on the empty counter of the coffee shop as his legs swing back and forth. Beside him lays a backpack filled to the brim.
The clock strikes seven and Mark is starting to become worried. What happened... was this all just a stupid prank? Mark shakes off this thought, he couldn't come to believe that Jinyoung would do something like that.
*Ring* Mark is snapped out of his thoughts as the the glass door swings open. Jinyoung.
Mark hops off the counter and walks towards the boy carrying what looks like a 20 pound bag.
“Hey Mark!” Jinyoung is smiling ear to ear as Mark helps take his bag off.
“Gosh, why are you so late?” Mark's voice showing a hint of worry.
“Haha, I accidentally fell asleep as soon as I got back and I forgot to pack, so I had to pack everything this morning!” Jinyoung smiles sheepishly as he points to the bag on the counter.
“Geez you had me worri-” Mark stops his words, but he's too late.
“You were worried Mark?” Jinyoung looks into Mark's eyes.
Mark bends down his head so his eyes meet the floor, his face burning a hot red. “Maybe just a little bit.” Mark mumbles slightly incoherently.
But Jinyoung catches Mark's confession, his eyes widening as his mouth curls into a smile. “Thank you Mark.” These words are filled with sincere gratitude that makes Mark's heart beat fast.
“Yeah.” Damn, can't you say more than that? “U-um Jinyoung, where is my umbrella?”
“Shoot.”
Mark's heart stops. That umbrella..
“Sorry Mark I left it back at my place, I'll go back and get it.”
“N-no it's okay, it's just an umbrella anyway, we can find ano-”
“It's not okay Mark.”
Mark looks up in surprise.
“I can see, that umbrella is important. Let's go get it together.” Jinyoung is already walking to the entrance, a strange determination gleaming within his eyes.
Jinyoung. “Yah wait for me.” Is all Mark can come up with as they leave the empty coffee shop to retrieve the transparent umbrella.
“Hey Jinyoung, how far is your place anyway?” The two boys have been walking in a peaceful silence for around ten minutes.
“Mm, across the bridge.”
What? “Across the bridge? But there's nothing there but forestry, how can your home be there?”
“Well it’s not exactly the most secure place.” Jinyoung chimes as he skips ahead.
What does he mean? As far as Mark was concerned, the only buildings across the bridge were ruins, taken over by nature.
Jinyoung stops in his tracks and looks up, that's when Mark realizes; the whole time that Jinyoung was referring to his home, he was referring to these ruins. “We're here.” Jinyoung walks through what seems to be a door and continues treading through the dark.
“Jinyoung, how could you live here? It's not safe here, the ruins could break at any moment and there are wild animals here too.”
“Haha, the animals won't hurt anyone, Mark, and the vines keep this place up so don't worry about it.”
What? “Jinyoung, how long you lived here?” Mark finds it odd that someone would leave Jinyoung alone here.
“Ever since I was a baby.” Jinyoung searches around. “Ah where did I leave it?”
“Who fed you? Who taught you to talk?”
“No one, myself. I think so anyway, I think there was a monkey that left me food when I was a baby but after I grew old enough to crawl, that monkey never came back.”
“Gosh Jinyoung, that’s amazing.” Mark stares at awe at the boy standing before him.
“Ah found it!” Jinyoung bends down and picks up the slightly damp umbrella. “It’s nothing much.” Jinyoung grins ear to ear as he hands over the transparent umbrella.
“No honestly Jinyoung, you’re amazing.” Jinyoung smiles.
“Thanks Mark.”
The two boys walk out of the ruins and down the long path back to their new home.
“Yah Jinyoung, why do you have so much stuff?” Mark whines as he continues to empty Jinyoung’s endless bag.
Jinyoung laughs as he continues to fumble around with the coffee machines. “Well if we’re making a home, it needs to have furniture right?”
“That doesn’t mean you needed to bring a blow dryer.” Mark laughs at the odd objects he keeps pulling out of Jinyoung’s bag.
“Yah Mark, what’s the day today?”
“Mmm the 24th I think.”
“It’s a day until Christmas!” Jinyoung yells, a smile on his face.
Christmas.. “How do you know about Christmas Jinyoung?” Mark smiles, the fond memories once again flooding the boy.
“When I was walking down the streets a year ago, I saw a house with lights on, and there was a tree with lights on it. Their whole house was bright and lively, there were loud noises, and on the door there was a sign that said ‘Merry Christmas’”. Jinyoung’s eyes are closed as he recalls that day a year ago.
“You want to do that too?”
“Do what?” Jinyoung looks up from the coffee machine, puzzled at Mark’s sudden question.
“You want to set up a tree?”
“Really?” Jinyoung hops over the counter and prances towards Mark. “Can we really?”
Mark laughs at the cuteness of Jinyoung. “Of course, my house has a tree and some lights. We could definitely decorate the whole house.” Mark smiles as he ruffles Jinyoung’s hair.
“Can you go get it now Mark? I want to set it up now.” Jinyoung pulls on Mark’s jacket, his eyes sparkling brightly.
“Haha okay, let’s go together.”
“Yes!” Jinyoung half pulls, half drags Mark out the door, the sun shining down on them as they walk down the empty pathways.
“Ready?” Mark tightens his grip on Jinyoung’s hand. The two boys stand in front of a white door, the hallways dark and absent of light. Jinyoung nods, and Mark pushes open the unlocked door. “I’m home.” As usual, Mark expects to hear the soft echo of his own voice and not another voice interrupting but he’s wrong.
“Mark, Mark!”
Mom? A figure runs down the hallways and stops in front of Mark and Jinyoung. My mom is talking to me? “Mom…”
“Mark…” His mom’s eyes are bright, as though nothing had ever happened within those many years of silence. “Do you have any money?”
What?
“Son, we’ve run out of money, we can’t pay for the connection.” It’s Mark’s father that speaks this time.
“Is that all you have to say to me?” Mark’s voice hurt, as though somewhere within him, he’s waiting for a different answer.
“What do you mean? What other reason would we be talking to you?”
The words pierce through Mark’s beating heart. So that’s how it is. I should have known. “I have nothing to say to you, I’m here to get some things and then I’m leaving; and I’m not coming back.” Mark pulls Jinyoung by the arm, pushing past his two parents.
“You can’t do this to us, we’re your parents.”
Mark keeps walking, stopping at several closets to grab different lights and ornaments; handing them off to Jinyoung. Mark opens the biggest closet and pulls out a big box, one that Mark can barely lift. “Let’s go Jinyoung.”
“M-Mark, shouldn’t you help your family?” Jinyoung wavers, afraid of the elder’s decision. But Mark simply shakes his head.
The two walk past Mark’s parents who still stand there, eyes opened wide; and before Mark leaves the house, he turns back. “You were my family and I treasure every single moment we had together. But we’re not anymore and I can see that as light as day. Jinyoung’s the only one who can see my true feelings, he’s where I belong.”
“Ma-” Mark slams the white door behind him before his parents can say anything else.
The walk back to their home is silent, Jinyoung afraid to speak a word to the elder. But Mark speaks up. “I’m sorry you had to see that.”
The words nearly tear Jinyoung’s heart apart. “Are you sure you shouldn’t help your parents?” Is all Jinyoung can muster within his mind.
“They aren’t my parents Jinyoung. Whatever was left of their warm hearts is gone, taken over by their greed and addiction.” Mark spits these words out. Jinyoung can only nod. “You’re the only one Jinyoung ah, the only one I can look into and see warmth, do you know that?”
Jinyoung blushes a bright red. “Same for me Mark..” Jinyoung whispers, shocking Mark.
A small smile forms on Mark. “We’re here Jinyoung.” Mark slides his body sideways through the glass door in order to fit in the big box. “Let’s set this up tomorrow, we should sleep now.”
The sun has set around the ghost town, the lamps on the streets slowly blinking on, a dim yellow light illuminating the dark streets.
“Yeah, lets.”
The two say their goodnights and slip into their sleeping bags they had brought from home and within minutes Mark can hear the soft muffled snores from Jinyoung. A day till Christmas huh, I wonder what it will be like? Mark smiles to himself and he himself also slips into a deep sleep, tired from the day’s adventures.
*Rustle Rustle*
Huh? What’s that noise?
Mark sits up wearily, his back throbbing sorely from the hard ground.
“Ah Mark, sorry did I wake you?” Jinyoung is bent over, a cup of coffee in one hand, the other rummaging through the boxes of ornaments.
“No it’s okay, you should’ve woken me anyway.” Mark pulls his feet out of his warm cocoon as he rubs his eyes. “What time is it?” Mark drags himself over to the counter to get a cup of coffee.
“I think it’s one o'clock, it was when I woke up anyway.” Jinyoung chuckles to himself as he continues to rummage through the ornaments. “Hurry up and help me over here Mark, we have a long day ahead of us!”
“Yeah yeah, I still need to get myself some coffee Jinyoung.” Mark laughs as he quickly brews himself a cup, his skills becoming almost expert after making so many cups.
Mark is almost done brewing himself a cup when he hears a yelp. “Jinyoung?” Mark pops his head over the coffee machines and sees a very peculiar sight. Jinyoung is somehow entangled within a bunch of Christmas lights, his hands bound unable to move.
“Uhh, I may or may not have gotten a bit stuck..” Jinyoung gives a nervous smile to Mark, Mark sighs yet a smirk evident on his lips.
How cute.. Mark puts his cup coffee down and walks over to Jinyoung. “Gosh Jinyoung, I told you to wait for me.” Mark smirks as he helps Jinyoung untangle himself, a pout on the younger’s face.
“Yah Mark, it’s not my fault you’re like a rock when you sleep.” Jinyoung whines to Mark.
“Oh what was that Jinyoung-ie?” Mark’s eyes glitter as he smirks at Jinyoung. The two young boys burst out into laughter, their voices echoing out through the empty shop and through the desolate streets.
“Mark, help me set up the tree first.” Jinyoung walks over to the huge box lying on it’s side as he puts down the tangled mess of lights.
“Calm down Jinyoung ah, we have all day.” Mark chuckles at the excitement of the younger.
“Yah, I’m afraid at this rate we won’t even be able to finish the tree by tonight.” Jinyoung exclaims loudly, a smile planted on his face.
“Fine fine.” Mark gulps down his scorching coffee and quickly walks over to help Jinyoung with the Christmas tree.
The time flies by like this- the two side by side laughing as they hang up ornaments, fiddle with lights, make snowflakes, stuff themselves with food, and simply talking. Minutes turn into hours as the two boys enjoy each other’s company within the warm room, not even noticing as soft flakes begin to fall from the sky.
“Mark!” Jinyoung’s yell makes Mark’s head shoot up from his warm sleeping bag.
“What is it?” Mark looks around Jinyoung, his face panicked.
“It’s snowing!” Jinyoung’s back is turned to Mark, the younger’s body pressed up against the glass door as he stares out onto the streets.
Mark scrambles up onto his feet as he runs from his sleeping bag to Jinyoung by the window, his own eyes sparkling brightly.
Snow…
“Look at it Mark, it’s even sticking to the ground!” Jinyoung looks to Mark, his eyes wide with joy,
Mark can’t help but smile. “You’re so cute Jinyoung.” The words escape Mark’s lips absentmindedly and he feels his cheeks grow hot upon realization. But thankfully, it’s not just him.
“W-what’re you saying Mark..” Jinyoung’s head is down but Mark can see the younger’s face is flushed in embarrassment.
“U-uhh, let’s light up the tree now!” Mark exclaims as he turns away, unable to handle the sight of Jinyoung. Mark runs over to the lights and switches them off, almost tripping over a rogue ornament.
“Yeah..” Jinyoung steps away from the door, finally feeling his face return to a normal warmth.
The room is filled with darkness and the two nearly bump into each other as they wander around trying to reach the empty space of floor in front of their tree. After seconds of fumbling around in the darkness, Mark has his hands on the switch and the two are sitting side by side.
“Ready Jinyoung?” Mark looks to his right to darkness, unable to see Jinyoung through the pitch dark.
“Yeah.”
The lights flicker on and colour floods the room. Jinyoung almost gasps at the bright lights that shine in front of him. Mark can finally see around and looking at Jinyoung, he feels a sense of belonging.
“Jinyoung are you happy?” Mark questions, a smile imprinted on the boy.
“Yes of course!” Jinyoung replies with delight as he stares straight into Mark’s eyes.
“Jinyoung, I have a present for you.”
“A present? When did you have time to get me a present?” Jinyoung’s eyes are wide open, confusion in the boy’s words.
“Close your eyes, and I’ll count down from 10.” Mark smiles as he scoots himself closer to Jinyoung.
“Okay..” Jinyoung closes his eyes, anticipating Mark’s present.
“10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3…. 2…… 1…”
Mark’s lips meets Jinyoung’s, and Jinyoung’s eyes open in surprise. The younger is confused as Mark moves away, his eyes fluttering open. Jinyoung feels his face grow hot, but he needs to say this.
“Thank you Mark...” Jinyoung looks straight into Mark’s eyes, the lights reflecting within them.
“Merry Christmas Jinyoung.” Mark smiles as he leans in once again, this time Jinyoung closing his eyes. Their lips meet once again, both of their faces flushing bright red. A feeling flushes through both Mark and Jinyoung, a feeling that the two of them can not ignore. Love.
Thank you Jinyoung.
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