Warning: Unbeta'ed

Please come home for Christmas

Bells will be ringing this sad sad news

Oh what a Christmas to have the blues

“I think I’m getting it right this time.”

Kyungsoo wipes his sweat. He lightly swipes the seek button to review the video that he has been viewing repetitively for about an hour already. He silently weeps in frustration as he glances at his daughter who is patiently waiting for him to finish the hair braid tutorial that she specifically requested over dinner last night. He didn’t want to disappoint his daughter so he decided to spend his whole night searching for the short and easy to follow tutorials on Youtube, he didn’t even realize that it was one am when he felt his eyelids becoming heavy after reading the tips and tricks, all for the braid that Soojin, his daughter, wanted. The morning after, he secretly acquires his daughter’s doll and tried to do the tutorial on its hair, fully confident about the imbibed knowledge regarding hairdos and braids. However, on his first attempt, Kyungsoo realized that girl’s hairdos are a lot harder to be learned than the formulas he tried chugging on his mind before.

And now here he is, picking up the pink, hello kitty brush to softly comb her hair. The sweet scent of his daughter’s favorite shampoo somehow calms his yielding soul. He brushes it and carefully divides the hair evenly into three. He starts with the right section, placing it over middle section and the left over the right. He warily lifts the right section over the left, then the middle to the right. He does it randomly and in different processes. When he sees that there’s no more hair left to braid, he fishes the ribbon clip on his pocket and clips it on the tip of his daughter’s braided hair.  

“Appa is it done already?” Soojin asks, looking at his father who is filled with remorse upon seeing the disaster that he made with her hair. She beams and kisses her father’s cheeks. “Thank you, Appa! I will not remove this until I go to sleep. Papa needs to see this.” She then leaves, skipping her way to the mini library that his Papa built for her. She grabs the newest Almanac that her Appa bought for her yesterday and browses on the Geology section. She grins. It’s her favorite time of the day.

Kyungsoo stands by the door, still sulking at the mess that he made. However, when he sees his daughter smiling, he decides to ignore it and walks downstairs to make cookies for both of them.

There are only few more days left before Christmas. Kyungsoo stops to take a glimpse on their family picture. He smiles at the sight of them smiling, him, Jongin, and their daughter. He fails to control the tears that fell on his eyes as he rubs his thumb on the frame. This Christmas might be the same for the last two years, like the other year, where Jongin wasn’t able to come home due to the subsidence that happened on the surface mine three days before the holiday. Kyungsoo misses him a lot. He misses him every single day.

He takes notice of their wedding picture. Kyungsoo stares at it for a long time, he reminisces the day when they took it. Jongin was kissing his cheek while Kyungsoo furiously tried to hide his blushing face. It was taken on their wedding photo booth, where all of their guests had gathered to witness the couple facing the fancy camera in front of them. People were coaxing them to kiss each other and stop acting like you will still be s later tonight. He wipes his tears and smiles at the words beneath the photo: Kim Jongin and Kim Kyungsoo (01.13.12)

He carefully places the frame on its original position. He checks to see if there were any messages from his husband, he frowns when he sees none. He grabs all the baking ingredients and patiently waits for seven pm to come.

It has been three years since they got married. Kyungsoo was once working on a quaint coffee shop near their hometown. While a lot of people think that engineers are paid well on their jobs, Jongin was quite the opposite. He never wanted to be far from his family so he accepted the employment on the small contracting company in their area. While both of their incomes weren’t as high as their best friends did (the egoistic, tall man with a lisp was a highly respected attorney on a famous law firm in the city and his husband who cannot live without the kohl eyeliner painted on his eyes found a good position on an accounting firm), they were somehow able to furnish themselves a good life for their family. However, when they decided to adopt Soojin, and with the higher standards of living that they’re starting to have, along with Jongin’s mother becoming seriously ill, they knew that they needed to work out for a better income. And that’s when Jongin landed a job on Australia to finally use his profession as a Mining Engineer which should have happened a long time ago, had Jongin not stayed in their hometown.

The first year was hard, Kyungsoo had to spend most of his nights crying in despair because he misses Jongin a lot. He always tried to sound firm whenever Jongin was on the phone but the younger would always shed tears and confess that he should have just stayed there with them. Soojin was no different; she found it difficult to adjust and always threw tantrums whenever she sees her Appa crying. The original plan was for Jongin to have at least one month and a half break after six months but the company wasn’t able to give him the liberty to have that due to the lack of engineers in their group. When Kyungsoo thought that everything would change on their second year, it was no different at all. Jongin was assigned on the different part of the country to check on the erroneously designed mine on that area. Three days before Christmas, a subsidence occurred, causing Jongin to stay behind with all the other engineers to fix the mayhem before it is revealed on the press.

The cookies take a little longer to bake this time. Kyungsoo stares at the clock, he could wait for this. They have been waiting for Jongin for two years. They have a constant communication, Jongin calls every night at seven o’clock and ends it at eleven. Sometimes, if they’re lucky, he will call early. Today is no different. When he hauls the tray of cookies from the oven, seven also ticked on their clock. He hears the harsh footsteps of his daughter running towards him. He hollers a loving “Be careful, Soojin-ah, you might trip.” before placing the baked goodies on a plate.

“Appa, Papa has called! He is looking for you.” Soojin cheerfully says and places the laptop on their dining table. Kyungsoo wipes his hands on his apron before bashfully looking at his husband to say good evening and I miss you.

“Hi honey, I missed you today, I miss you every day.” Jongin says. Kyungsoo takes note of his husband’s body which has gotten more robust ever since he started working on the field. He blushes at the sight of Jongin’s lean muscles and wonders what he would feel if ever he finally sees him in person. If ever he finally feels them in…

“If I hadn’t known any better, I would think that your Appa is thinking something bad about me, Soojinie.” Jongin’s statement wakes him up from his stupor. He hisses at his husband who is now looking too blurry on the screen. Soojin looks confused but she has seen this kind of bickering a lot of times, it is fun to see his Appa blush.

Kyungsoo reheats the meal that they had for lunch, a habit that he has been used to ever since Jongin left for abroad. He feeds Soojin with a small cookie and kisses her forehead. He sees Jongin smile lovingly at the scene. He motions his daughter to feed herself as he grabs a stool to face his husband.

“I’m quite surprised that Soojinie still looks pretty even with the hair that Appa has made for her.”Jongin comments and Kyungsoo glares at him, but he glances at his daughter and realizes that what his husband said is true so he laughs, along with Jongin. Oh god, how he misses the sound of his laughter.

Kyungsoo clears his throat, bracing himself to ask the question that had been bugging in his mind for almost a year. “Jongin-ah, will you be able to come home for Christmas?”

He sees his daughter observing them, so he tells her to just keep on eating and that he has to talk to Papa privately first. He brings the laptop on the living room and waits for Jongin to speak.

“I was assigned on the Gold-Molybdenum Project, Soo. We are currently looking for ways to separate the two without having too much cost. This is a really big project, I think-”

Kyungsoo narrows his eyes. “You can’t come home.” He continues for him.

Jongin becomes silent and looks down. The tension is thick and the silence is swallowing both of them. Kyungsoo inhales and exhales loudly, he glares at Jongin before he starts to speak. “Please tell me that what my mind is telling me right now is wrong. Because my thoughts are telling me that you can’t come home to your family whom you haven’t seen for two years but when you’re job calls you once, you can’t say no.”

“Kyungsoo, you and I know that’s not true. All I’m wishing every day is just to come home.” Jongin replies and Kyungsoo feels his heart breaking at the sound of his husband’s quivering voice.

He sees Soojin standing on the doorway; he becomes firm and faces Jongin again. “I understand, Jongin but it’s been too long. I could live with the fact that I could only get to see you for a few months every year because at least, I, we could be with you. But it has been three years and we can’t even see your shadow. Don’t you think it’s too much?”

Jongin parts his lips to speak, then pauses again. He runs a hand through his hair. “I’m trying my best, Soo. Just trust me.”

Kyungsoo shakes his head. “I don’t think you understand me, Jongin-ah.” He wipes the tears that are threatening in his eyes. “Don’t you think you’re a bit tired from today’s work? Give it a good rest. I’ll talk to you soon, I love you.”

Kyungsoo leaves Soojin to talk to his father.

A day before Christmas and Kyungsoo finds himself taking pictures of Soojin posing cutely near the Christmas tree. He has been busy preparing the meals that he will be serving for the Christmas celebration on the midnight. His best friend and his husband will come tomorrow, in which he strictly stated that no gifts for Soojin- no food for Christmas. He hasn’t had a video call with Jongin ever since their fight. It had been the biggest one among all their arguments. He sees his phone constantly being sent messages by his husband (in which he replies too but avoids any topic that is about coming home). The last message he read this morning was: Trust me, Soo. I love you.

He has been working on the last cake. He sees Soojin placing all the big socks she acquired from her school on their windows. Kyungsoo laughs because he had already bought all the gifts Soojin wanted and he’s excited to hear her shout that she had been a good kid so Santa fulfilled all her wishes in her Christmas list.

Except for one thing that Kyungsoo never saw in Soojin's list.

I wish that Santa will bring Papa home for Christmas as a gift for Appa so he won’t be sad anymore.

Kyungsoo tucks Soojin to sleep at nine in the evening. It is hard to ask the child to sleep early when Christmas is just a few hours away. However, he insisted on his daughter that he will just wake her up on Christmas eve and that if she doesn’t obey, Santa won’t be giving her gifts. It was a wise decision as Soojin immediately brushed her teeth and changed into her pajamas so she could sleep. Kyungsoo kisses her goodnight and leaves to clean all the mess in their kitchen.

He checks his phone, seeing if there are any messages. There are few from his best friend, a sweet greeting from his parents and a plea to visit them after Christmas, and there is also a ridiculous message from his brother who is still asking for the lost gift twenty years ago. He smiles at them but he doesn’t ignore the pang he’s feeling in his heart when he realizes that there isn’t anything coming from Jongin.

He starts to cry. Maybe he shouldn’t have been too harsh. Maybe he should have been more understanding. Maybe he shouldn’t have done it; they could at least have conversation on the Christmas Eve.

He takes a shower as soon as he finishes the chores. His eyes are still puffy from crying. He checks Soojin and smiles a bit when he sees his daughter peacefully sleeping. He walks downstairs to make sure is he was able to lock the doors when he sees a duffel bag on the corner of the stairs. He clutches on the baseball bat and silently prays that there’s not a thief on Christmas Eve. He walks further and sees few more luggages scattered on the floor. His eyes widen. What if it wasn’t a thief? What if it was a killer?

The kitchen is dark and all he sees is a figure being illuminated by the moonlight. The person is awfully familiar but he still gathers his courage to raise the bat and hit him in the head-

When he feels a familiar pair of arms holding him and lips pressing against his. Soon, the lights are opened and he sees Jongin holding him. Tears start pooling in his eyes because god is this a dream? It’s a beautiful one. He takes time to slowly kiss him back and Jongin holds him tenderly, gradually moving his hand to Kyungsoo’s neck to deepen the kiss. They part to gasp for air; Kyungsoo blinks and touches Jongin’s cheeks. Jongin chuckles and takes his husband’s hand to kiss his fingertips. He brings him closer again and to give him a peck on the lips.

“I told you to trust me, Soo. I’m home for Christmas.”

Jongin points at the clock; it’s officially the 25^th of December. And Kyungsoo forgets all the loneliness when he receives the best present in his life.

“Merry Christmas, my love.”

Oh there'll be no more sorrow, no grief and pain

And I'll be happy, Christmas once again

End

Okay I lied. This is over 2k so this is like a short-fic. Or a drabble? Haha. Don't you just love reading everything on Kyungsoo's point of view. And kaisoo familyau+Christmas will always be my weakness. Cries. Please do give me responses if you liked it. Like please, pleaseeee? :(((