This morning I find myself standing in front of the door of Park Bom shared apartment with Seunghyun, knocking on her door hoping she would open it up for me. It took the sacrifices of my all pride to ask Tablo where Bom lives only to have him gave Seunghyun’s address instead. Yeah damn it I forgot it they are lovers so they perhaps living together right now. Coming this early to their apartment may not be a good time, but I need to see her, I need to talk to her. I already prepared everything, if she comes up with Seunghyun to open up this door, I will tell them I need to see my daughter. Yeah, not that I will use her as a weapon to win her back because I need to see her too, and somehow I wish she can help me to win Bom back.

It has been a week, e week not meeting both Bom and Haru is a hell for me. Yes it was a hell for me, dealing with Dara is one thing that takes my energy away from my body. More when I had to deal with my mom. My mom loves her so much, and when she knew about what happened to Dara last week, she became so worry. My mom doesn’t know about Bom and Haru so when Dara came to my house begging for apologize, she embraced her despite knowing the real truth behind. My mom knows how stubborn I am, and looking at my rejection I sent to Dara making her can’t do anything. And so Dara gave up, yesterday she left to Philippine and that was when I thought this is the time to win my daughter and her mother back.

 I’m standing for a moment, she hasn’t opened the door yet. There the thought of leaving flashes my mind, what if she is busy? But in the morning? The thought of her and Seunghyun being together inside sickening me and I hate it. Can’t wait any longer, I knock her door harder than before. I hear the door cracks open and suddenly my heart stops beating only to beat even faster when Bom opens the door.

She is now in front of me, looking so flawless in her big size tee and short pants. Her hair is tied into a messy bun and her bare face looks so innocent. I stare at her for a moment before I hear her voice.

“Jiyong.” She says with her gentle voice. “Come in.” I following her as she goes inside, it’s somehow making me nervous. She closes the door when we are inside. I scan the room, I can tell the room is a mess, toys everywhere, and the white wall full with drawing, but somehow I feel comfort as I know it is my daughter toys, and it’s her drawing. Damn I have missed the best moment of this, the best moment of my daughter’s life.

“Please seat.” Bom says breaking my thoughts. I nod as I seat and so she does.

“You know what brings me here.” I say even before she asks what is the reason I come here in the morning. I know she realizes what’s being my concern. “I’m sorry for what did 5 years ago, but I just want you to know that I don’t regret it. I don’t regret to ever know you, in fact I am so happy. You made me have the purpose to live my life, Bom. You don’t know how much you affect me but you do Bom, you do.” I look into her eyes, she sets her eyes to me. Then I take another breath to speak again. “I’m sorry for the chaos I caused last week, sorry for what Dara has done, all the blame is on me. But trust me Bom, seeing you that night, making me realized that I really can’t live without you. More when I knew we have Haru between us, I can’t imagine my life without you both in it.” I see her she furrows her brows, I think she is in a deep thought. Looking at her makes me scared, damn she’s going to reject me and shut me down again and again.

“Haru needs me, as much as I need her in my life, Bom. Please I’m her father, Bom. It’s so hard for me imagining her calling another man as her father.” I say frustrated. But then she laughs so hard I have no idea what’s on her mind.

“What?” I ask annoyed. I see her face changed into the serious face.

“To tell the truth, I wasn’t mad at you. I don’t regret anything we’ve shared even though it was just a one night stand or even few meetings. I thought that night was the worst night in my life as I was in my deep brokenhearted after my boyfriend decided to cut the relationship with me, and judging of how broken I was I thought I can’t love again. But the same night fate brought me to you, I think what I was thinking was wrong. Call me crazy to say I already in love with you in our fourth meeting but then I did. The day I found I was pregnant with your baby, I was so happy yet at the same time I was so scared. It was a one night stand and perhaps you didn’t expect to have baby, more when the baby from the stranger, but I had to tell you. You know what happened when I went to your office.” She stops making me feel guilty. Dara. God I wish I knew it.

“But you love me.” That’s the good thing she told me and I’m so released to hear it from her own mouth.

“Yes but that day I thought you were in a relationship with her. I was so sad and so I left.” Her voice is getting weak.

“I’m sorry.” I brave myself to touch her hand. “Sorry.” She shakes her head.

“Don’t. Despite what happened between us, I am so thankful. Thank you because of you I can have a beautiful angel in my life. You brought me to Haru and I can’t be more grateful. And Jiyong, even before you apologize about Dara, I already forgive you.” Happiness and joy I feel hearing her words echoing my ears. She makes me like the happiest man on earth only by hearing her words. I don’t know how much happiness inside my head, I find my body just an inch to her body, my hands cupping her face gently and slowly I bring myself to kiss her.

Kissing her, I can’t get enough of this. It feels good, so great, and I’m feeling like I’m in heaven. It is not an ordinary kiss, start from the fact that the one I kiss is the extraordinary woman I love in my life, and all the feeling we’ve pouring into each other’s that makes the kiss feels like a heaven. I know I loved her, damn it I love her and I will always love her.

I curse inside my head when I hear the door opened forcing Bom to pull out from me, from the heavenly kiss we’ve shared. Then I look Seunghyun coming from the room, I supposed it is the bedroom, to my surprise someone is following him from behind, someone I know, Kiko. What is she doing here in the morning? And com