“ Long time no see.”

The thing in Ji Yong’s hand dropped down, he couldn’t believe, in this life, he could hear the familiar voice, he could see the dearest smile once again. Standing in front of him, was Lee Seungri, he was here in reality, he wasn’t  just an illusion of Kwon Ji Yong, not just an existence only lived in Kwon Ji Yong’s dream.

“ You…you’re back…”

Kwon Ji Yong’s voice trembled, but not his voice, all his body, his mind, his heart also were shaking. He slowly reached his hand to Seungri, he wanted to touch him, he wanted to feel, he wanted to make sure, Seungri, Seungri, his Seungri…ah no…he…he didn’t have the right to call him like that anymore…

Seungri was still calmly looking at Kwon Ji Yong, he kept his courtesy smile and reached his hand to shake Ji Yong’s hand, just like two strange acquaintance who once unexpectedly met.

Kwon Ji Yong hardly shaked Seungri’s hand, his vision suddenly was blurry, he couldn’t distinguish who was who anymore. Even though there was a grown up man Lee Seungri, Kwon Ji Yong only saw a youth Seungri, who always happpily smiled and called him.

“ Ji Yong, I’m here…”

--------

They have met each other since they were teenages.

Kwon Ji Yong and Seungri, just like the most natural thing, were attracted and came closer to each other. Clearly they had so different and opposite personalities, but still, no words suit them than one word, only one word, “ need”. Yeah, it was strange, however, they really, really need each other.

“ Sometimes I think that I’m a tree in desert and you’re my water. Maybe I can live without water in a while, but in the end, I just exist in a painful way and slowly die inside. Sound weird, right ?”

Seungri told Ji Yong like that. He talked in a playful way but Ji Yong thought, Seungri was also serious about that feeling. Because he was too. To Kwon Ji Yong, Seungri was just like the air, you can’t realize how much it’s important to you, but it ‘s always there for you to live. Ji Yong used to have a faith, Seungri would always be there for him, he only turned back to see, and Seungri’s smile would forever remain for him. No matter what, no matter where, no matter how….

They, at that time, were their everything.

Ji Yong used to have a dream, that when he could a chance, he wanted to travel around all the world and take picture of every beautiful places.

“ It sounds so great ! Can I go with you ?”

Seungri always cheered him and supported him like that. They bought so many maps and pictures of worlds, just to choose where they could travel. They had so many disscusion about the travel and agrued like they could travel immediately. When they realized how childish they were, they laughed at each other’s face and began hitting each other playfully.

Under the sunshine, two young men was lying on the green grass, let the sun shined their happy face, their hands slightly touched each other .

“ The weather is so good.”

“ Yeah.”

“ I’m feeling so good.”

“ Yeah.”

“ Because you’re here with me.”

“ Yeah…what ??”

Seungri turned his head to meet Ji Yong’s eyes. Ji Yong gently his hair and smiled.

“ Let’s stay together like this till…till we can, can we ?”

And Seungri’s smile at that time, just like a tattoo, engraved deeply into Ji Yong’s heart.

“ Yes.”

Kwon Ji Yong and Lee Seungri, they told each other all the things, all the words, except three important words. Something was remained there, but couldn’t uttered…

Two men,

One cruel life,

One “ outlaw” emotion,

One hopeless wish…

“ Kwon Ji Yong, you need to get married. You want a family, you need a family, don’t you ??”

“ Mom, give me a rest, please. I…I…still need time to prepare.”

“ Prepare what, Ji Yong ??? Son, remember when you was little, you told me that you want to have a family which have Father, mother, sister and brother. You told me that you love children and you’ll be the best Father in the world. Ji Yong, it’s time to fullfill your dream. You’re going to have the happiest family.”

But Mom, but…

I have another dream, a bigger dream of my life.

The smile of one person.

“ Ji Yong, Ji Yong….”

Mom, can you please forgive me…

Ji Yong burried his face into his hands. Seungri, Seungri, what can I do ? 

“ Ji Yong, I need to go.”

“ Ji Yong, between us, just an illusion.”

“ Ji Yong,  do you believe in stupid wish ? You do, but I don’t.”

“ Ji Yong, let me go.”

With those words, Seungri left him. Definitively.

No matter what he grabbed his hand back,

No matter what he screamed for him to look back,

No matter what…

Ji Yong nearly went crazy. Without a trace, Seungri disappeared from his life. Couldn’t be found, couldn’t…couldn’t…

One day,

One month,

One year,

Two year,

Three year,

And because of his family’s tears and pain, Ji Yong accepte