Music: A thousand years (cover) by Boyce Avenue

Chapter 5 - A thousand years

It has been two weeks since the last time Hayi saw eye to eye with Kyungsoo. Everything felt numb after that night for the young girl, even the serious outrage of her father didn’t faze her or the upsetting quietness of her mother despite the fact that her daughter disappeared for such a long time didn’t make her cringe. She never had to face such an unsettling dilemma in her life. Hayi surely did have and still has her ups and down’s within her family but feeling conflicted about someone else that wasn’t part of her every day circle seemed too foreign. Her first instinctive reflex was feeling a certain betrayal considering the questionable actions of the librarian.  

But were they really questionable? Or did she just hold a bias based on their short-termed friendship? It was undeniable that she would’ve preferred for him to not meddle so personally in her life. In all honesty, he became slowly a sort of shelter for her, something or rather someone to hold onto. As a result, this kind of behavior from him naturally made her lose her freaking mind. How could he have such an impact on her was beyond Hayi’s understanding. Fast pacing around her room while thinking about the still unknown man became something she did frequently and whenever she came to realize it, Hayi would only sigh annoyed at her own stupidity. Why did she care so much? When he probably didn't give a single ?

A deep voice sighed in the other direction of her room. ‘’Hayi it’s time to go to school. You didn’t attend any classes for almost 4 weeks.’’

‘’Dad, I don’t think I can…’’, said Hayi with a weak tone trying her best to avert the intense glare of her father.

Bothered, he simply took her right arm and looked her dead on in the eyes. ‘’Listen Choi Lee Hayi I am done with people in this family avoiding what frightens them. Do you really want to end up like your…mother?’’

‘’ What’s so wrong with being like mother, Dad?’’ asked Hayi genuinely, her damaged heart sinking.

‘’When you say this kind of nonsense, I just can’t help to feel like a horrible human being.’’, he added in disbelief ‘’what did we do to you?’’

He looked at her with a broken expression and he left without another word. The lump in the throat of Hayi quickly materialized in warm tears on her rosy cheeks. She did wonder why she had to justify the somber conduct of her mother, but she couldn’t help it.

Suhyun was a cute girl with a round and small puffy face that made people wonder quite often if she wasn’t still in high school. While her boyfriend Jinhwan had curly blonde hair and he was the captain of the basketball team even with his ridiculous short height.

‘’ I should be asking you why are you so obsess with her?’’, responded Jinhwan amused ‘’, perhaps you’re an actual lesbian and I didn’t know all along’’, snickered the young man.

She kept silent for a while making his jaw drop ‘’Wait, actually?’’

‘’No idiot, I’m just wondering…you know.’’ she told him with fondness ‘’did you ever hear her sing in the music room after school? She sounds like a siren, exquisite.’’

Finally, a petite girl with long honey blonde hair entered the occupied cafeteria with an uncomfortable expression and a plate of food in her hands. Suhyun had to do a double take because it felt like an illusion.

‘’Pinch me Jinhwan, like now.’’ He did immediately and with a lot of force.

‘’Ouch! Not actually ’’, she hit him violently in return making him choke on his dumpling soup. ‘’One day you will be the reason  behind my sudden death and that day I will make sure that you’ll be punished for it. I already have witnesses right Jiwon?’’

‘’Huh?’’, asked the one in question. He was flirting shamelessly with his girlfriend, Lisa Manoban. ‘’Man, just forget everything I said’’, answered Jinwhan bitterly.

Suhyun shook his arm intensely. ‘’What, now?! ’’, he growled truly annoyed.

‘’ Let’s go talk to her. She’s all alone!’’

‘’But-‘’ Jinhwan immediately objected. ‘’Shut up and come with me, you blonde idiot.’’, she grabbed his arm and basically dragged him on the other side of the cafeteria.

Suhyun was one of the most popular girls on campus. Talking with her was like talking with a ray of sunshine everyone appreciated her positive energy. It is without a doubt Suhyun’s adorable persona that made Jinhwan fall so deeply for her. She greeted Hayi excited catching the attention of a big part of the cafeteria. Suhyun sat down on one side of the table making sure Jinwhan was also doing the same. She took a pink handbook out of her bag and placed it right in front of Hayi.

‘’ Hi! Nice to meet you, I am Suhyun. We have the same psychology class together.’’, exclaimed the girl enthusiastic ‘’I know you’ve been missing for a long time so if you want I can give you my notes?’’

Hayi looked at her with a flushed face. She certainly felt overwhelmed by the extroverted personality of Suhyun. But she wanted to answer to her kindness but nothing came out of . Once again she became mute against her will. Embarrassed, she simply continued to eat her Buggolgi, hoping Suhyun would soon disappear without causing a ruckus. ‘’Ah, I’m sorry for making you uncomfortable. I can scare people a lot with my roaring temper.’’ She laughed while scratching the back of her head.

Jinwhan quickly became uncomfortable with the apparent silence of Hayi. Suhyun then introduced him to Hayi ‘’, so this is my boyfriend, Kim jinwhan. He’s doing his major in economics.’’, trilled the brunette. An awkward silence followed. Even Suhyun that never felt flustered started to feel the heat. Hayi kept her head hung low while looking at her dinner like it was the most interesting thing in the world. It went on for at least 15 to 20 minutes. At this point, Hayi didn’t even know where to look at anymore. She just wished this would be over soon. ‘’I must be annoying you right?’’, spluttered Suhyun slightly ashamed with tears in her eyes. Jinwhan looked at her in shock.

She used to be bullied as a child because of her crescent shaped eyes and her heavier size. What was happening now felt like a painful déja vue. She did have an inferiority complex at times but these days she knew how to not let herself go down memory lane.  Being ignored by the girls she looked up too, was something she knew too well. Suhyun did want to talk with Hayi because of her soothing voice but also because she could still see her past self within the blonde girl. She wasn’t crying because of Hayi’s silence but because she felt like facing a dark part of her past while talking to the girl. The brunette stood up and she quickly got out of the cafeteria emotionally. Jinwhan was taken aback it wasn’t like Suhyun to cry so easily. He was now in a black mood; he shot daggers in the direction of Hayi when she met his dark brown eyes.

‘’ I don’t know what it is with you but hurting someone because you can’t see pass your own pride isn’t right. Especially, when that person is the only one to give you a chance.‘’, said Jinhwan gloomily ‘’By the way she took 10 hours to rewrite all of this , enjoy.’’ He then stood up and evacuated the cacophonic cafeteria.

‘’ If you didn’t always barge in and disrupt my creative process maybe I’d be able to make something reasonable.’’, snapped Kyungsoo while massaging his sore temples.

‘’It’s not even about me anymore. You just can’t produce anything that isn’t morose and depressing. I want to hear something new and innovative is this seriously too much to ask for soo?’’, said the older man.

Kyungsoo sighed heavily and looked at the blank page in front of him. He couldn’t exactly compose anything these days. Because his mind was infatuated with thoughts of the honey blonde haired girl or should he call her Lee Hayi. She didn’t even come close to the library in a total of 2 weeks. It did bother him in fact it felt like someone robbed him from a very important part of his soul. He couldn’t help but to feel like he’s known her for a thousand years. He was so aggravated that Kyungsoo couldn’t even meet the low expectations of his brother anymore. It used to be easy for him to just write something and let Jiyong do whatever he wanted with it. But he was slowly starting to put everything in perspective.   His brother sat next to him upset.

‘’ We have this new artist under our label and-‘’

‘’And you want me to give her a great song that will have her name on it and I will still stay in the shadows of her success, I know.’’, interrupted Kyungsoo.

He already knew how it usually worked. His brother did this little game with him way too often. ‘’You’re right but why do I feel like suddenly you are displeased about it. It isn’t anything new. ‘’, muttered Jiyong with a lifted brow.

‘’ It never is, listen Jiyong I’m just tired and I have a lot on my mind. I’ll work on this later don’t worry.’’

‘’ I am not worried about you but about the god damn song so make it work!’’, he said unhappy ‘’ by the way Dara wants you to come to our thanksgiving dinner. Something, about wanting to have a real family dinner, don’t feel obligated to come but you know she would love it.’’

‘’That turns me on even more.’’, muttered Jongin in the milky neck of his girlfriend. ‘’pleasuring me and my girlfriend while driving Kyungsoo crazy, lovely.’’

He was giving small butterfly kisses on her neck while holding her delicately close to his chest. She couldn’t help but laugh at his overload of affection. She pushed him a little bit but he hold her even closer to him. ‘’ I love you.’’, he muffled a lump in his throat; his face was still hidden in the crook of her neck. Minji suddenly stop laughing, it was the first time that Jongin said those words to her in 4 years. She felt slightly overwhelmed. ‘’ Is something wrong?’’

Something had to be wrong for him to just confess like that.

‘’I failed the SM audition…again’’ he finally cried. ‘’ I’m sorry, I’m kind of ruining the mood right now with my lame crying.’’ He snickered.

She could feel her neck getting damp with his tears. It was now time for her to hold onto him with force. ‘’It’s okay, it’s okay Jongin.’’

‘’It isn’t okay Min, I failed again, I failed you again. I can’t even look you in the eyes right now. It makes me wonder why you had to end up with such a failure like me. Honestly why do you stay with me?’’

‘’Are you serious right now. You better revaluate yourself now Kim Jongin before I really get mad. Who was the one to give me more than 60 000 thousand won the other day in my bank account? Don’t think I would just let it go without saying anything Jongin. Why did you do it? Where did you find all this money?’’

He sniffed and he looked her in the eyes with a strong gaze. His face was still wet with tears. ‘’Don’t worry about that, it’s normal for me to do this much.’’

She wanted to tell him to take back this money. But she did need it. She needed it so dearly.

‘’I knew you would say that. You always say that.’’, she whispered getting emotional. ‘’I love you too.’’

He smiled sadly and he hugged her once again. He inhaled vigorously her scent, she smelled like sweet berries and vanilla. ‘’ Stop acting tough Jongin okay? Cry if you need to and smile when you feel like it. You don’t need to pretend around me. I’ll always be there no matter what.’’

Jongin let out a low laugh, ‘’It’s not that I need to pretend around you. You just make me naturally happy even when I feel down.’’

He kissed her tenderly on her luscious lips. ‘’ Now let’s do something that will definitely drive Kyungsoo out of his mind.’’, suggested Jongin naughtily.

Outside of the small library stood Lee Hayi, she glared at the back of what looked like to be a man holding a petite woman with pink hair. Her heart sank. ‘’Mermaid lover…?’’ she whispered to herself. It couldn’t possibly be him. A small whimper escaped her fine lips. Minji heard it and immediately covered her ed chest with her manicured hands. ‘’Stop Jongin… did you perhaps hear that?’’

‘’No, but I know what I will hear in a couple of minutes. You screaming, no begging for me to stop.’’ He said with a teasing tone. She giggled once again and didn’t think about it again initiating herself a sultry kiss between them.

He poured a cup of warm black tea to the man seating in front of him. ‘’ Mad is not exactly the word to describe how I feel right now Seunghyung.’’, answered the widower.

‘’ Dong Youngbae, it’s been a long time I know. I’ve never really got the chance to tell you my condolences about-’’

‘’No need to, just go straight to the point Choi.’’

‘’ I can’t,’’ said Seunghyung in a low voice ‘’ I need to do this much at least.’’

‘’ You showed me exactly how you felt when you or your family didn’t show up to her funeral’s. I don’t need your apology. She’s the one who does.’’, pointed out Youngbae while looking at his wedding ring.

‘’ I know I am an but don’t think badly of Bom. I’m the one that kept her in the dark all these years. I cut her away from Chaerin and I am taking responsibility for it now.’’

Youngbae looked at him in disbelief. ‘’ Tell me she at least knows about her death?’’

Seunghyung sat rigid on his chair with culpability in his eyes. The shorter male in front of him stood up revolted putting both of his hands on the table. ‘’ How could you do this to her? Most importantly how could you do this to Chaerin?’’, screamed Youngbae delirious.

Everyone in the small café looked in their direction. ‘’ I shouldn’t have trusted you enough to give the message to Bom, I’m such an idiot.’’, said the man while shaking his head not able to fully accept the harsh truth.

He sat back down heavily and looked at the view they had of the whole city.

Seunghyung nervously bit his inferior lip. ‘’Six years ago was a very sensible time for Bom. She didn’t need to hear about this, I had to protect her Youngbae.’’

‘’I always knew your relationship with Bom was extremely toxic. Chaerin knew it too. Is that why you didn’t let Bom go to her funeral Seunghyung?’’

‘’Maybe…’’, confessed Seunghyung ‘’No, it’s exactly why I didn’t let her. I was scared she would remember the words Chaerin told her about us being poisonous. We were in love Youngbae, not in some kind of unhealthy relationship.’’

‘’I am seriously doubting that Seunghyung.’’, murmured Youngbae, he didn’t even cringe when Seunghyung glared at him after what he said ‘’so why did you call me? If it’s for my forgiveness then you can forget about it.’’

He crossed his legs and arms at the same time tensed.

‘’No I just wanted to reminisce about our time and I wanted to have some wise advice from you. You were always the wise one of our crew.’’, a low giggle escaped from the lips of Seunghyung.

‘’ There needed to be at least one person that didn’t act like a total idiot in this group.’’, hissed Youngbae. ‘’Also you weren’t exactly part of that crew Seunghyung more like you invited yourself in it.’’

‘’ Right, you sound exactly like before now, I missed this.’’, muttered the tall man ‘’ I almost forgot that crude part of you because you did softened after getting involve with Chae.’’

The said man only grimaced at the memories of him and his deceased wife. He was always a very strict person, he played by the rules and he never went against them. Naturally, he became a very successful lawyer making him stressed most of the time. But there were days when he remembered the soft words of his wife.

‘’Youngbae-ah so many wrinkles again… The only wrinkles I want to see on that face of yours are those adorable dimples okay?’’, he smiled at the sweet memory.

It didn’t take long for that smile to disappear when he realized he was still with Seunghyung.

‘’What exactly do you want to tell me?’’, asked the black haired man seriously.

Youngbae took a sip from the tea that was in front of him.

‘’I have a daughter Youngbae and as you might have guessed I am a horrible father.’’, giggled his companion in a dark manner.

‘’I knew this would happen.’’, whispered the lawyer ‘’what do you want me to say Seunghyung?’’

Almost immediately he answered desperate. ‘’I want you to scold the out of me. Punish me for doing this to her please. I can’t take it anymore, I don’t know how to repent myself.’’

At first, he thought that he was fooling around but then he understood that Seunghyung was more than serious. He really was looking for a way to repent himself but in Youngbae’s book there wasn’t a single way for this man to get pardoned for his hideous actions.

‘’I am not the one that needs to punish you Seunghyung and you know that.’’, started Youngbae but he stopped to try to find the right words ‘’ I am just going to tell you one thing. We are not in Italy Seunghyung, it isn’t only about you and Bom anymore. It isn’t about your epic love story anymore. Now there’s Hayi and she deserves to also be part of that story.’’

It didn’t seem so apparent to him until today. Hayi was definitely part of their story but it always felt like she was just another side character. A character without much meaning but he knew he was wrong for seeing it this way.

‘’ You’re right, all these years I never was able to see Hayi as something else but a barrier between me and Bom. But all along she was the result of the love that I have for Bom.’’ , said Seunghyung while looking into the depths of his tea cup.

Youngbae nod his head slowly after putting on the table his cup.

‘’ That’s why you should cherish her. Cherish her while she’s still there with you. Because you never know when everything will burst into flames. For all we know she might disappear and never come back, who knows.’’

Saying those words felt extremely personal to him. He was thinking about the day when everything burst into flames for him. Seunghyung rubbed his face in his hands intensely.

‘’She already ran away from home the other day and you know the worst in all of this? Bom didn’t seem worried for the least. Not even after she came back, she didn’t utter a single word.’’

A waiter came to their table asking if they needed anything and Seunghyung asked for a bottle of red wine. Youngbae looked around before lowering his voice.

‘’ What happened to her Seunghyung? Bom used to be the most cheerful out of all of us. She was a literal ball of sunshine. I knew I shouldn’t have presented you guys. Especially, since I knew about her ‘bad boy’ complex and her ex Siwon. ‘’

The female waiter came back with the wine and two empty glasses. They thanked her.

‘’I ruined her didn’t I?’’, muttered Seunghyung while pouring his glass with the wine.

‘’ Honestly, yes you did ruin her. You ruined one of the most precious friendships I’ve had since middle school by cutting us off like you did and I will never forgive you for that.’’

When it came to friendships in Youngbae’s life, the one he had with Bom was and still is very precious to him. She was there for him when his mom died at the age of 10 and he grew up with her. He made sure to protect her from everything and everyone for the longest time. But that was before she got interested in boys, before she met Siwon or even Seunghyung. He could protect her from almost anything but it was impossible for him to protect her heart. He did feel like he failed as a friend by letting her go so easily but he didn’t know what to do and now it came to this. This man in front of him wrecked her to bits and Younbae was profoundly hurt for his friend. He missed his adorable red haired friend from middle school. He knew she changed her hair color. But when she had her red hair, they had their best memories.

‘’ I didn’t care about anything. I didn’t care about the lies or hurting other people as long as I had the guarantee to have her for myself. I just loved her like that, without limits.’’

Angered, Youngbae closed his eyes trying to restrain himself from exploding.

‘’You know I am a man that lives with rules and limits. I can’t understand this kind of crazy mindset.’’, he said between his teeth’s.

‘’ I am truly sorry for everything that I did. But if I’d have to go back, I would still do the same decisions. It was my only way to keep Bom by my side; you guys were all against our love. We were meant to be Youngbae.’’

He shook his head violently ready to hit Seunghyung once and for all but he couldn’t let himself lose control so easily.

‘’ More like your love Seunghyung, you knew that if we stayed around just a little bit more she would’ve realized how toxic you were for her. This love wasn’t meant to be, you forced it upon her.’’, said Youngbae bitterly, a long silence followed his answer ‘’ your silence is telling me everything.’’

He stood up and dusted his dark grey suit ready to go. But Seunghyung quickly hold onto his forearm to stop him from going anywhere.

‘’ Now Youngbae what should I do to make everything right? Not only for me but for Hayi and Bom? ’’, choked Seunghyung with a distressed look in his eyes.

He pushed his arm away from him with an apparent disgust on his face.

‘’Like I’d give you an advice prick, I’ve had enough of your lamentations. You dug your own grave and I won’t help you.’’ He walked away.

‘’Chaerin would’ve helped me ’’, it was loud enough for him to hear even if he was now standing farther.

But Kyungsoo didn’t head for the cashier. Instead he went to the self-checkout machine even though there wasn’t any line in front of the real cashier. Hayi saw the confused expression on the cashier’s face. Because it would be faster to just let him checkout all of these items but then he shrugged his shoulders after yawning. He took out a magazine and started to flip through the pages not minding Kyungsoo anymore. She also was quite confused. Why did he do that? The words he told her last time then came back into context ‘’I mean if I’d have to be completely honest. The only reason why I’m able to talk with you right now is because I can’t see you and you can’t see me.’’ It was now obvious to Hayi that Kyungsoo just wasn’t someone very comfortable around other people. He was scared. In an odd way, she was relieved to see him struggle about something like that, something so close to home for her. After 20 minutes of checking out everything he finally got out of the store. She followed him immediately trying her best to stay in the dark so he wouldn’t see her. She saw in his bag a flower bouquet, Daisies.

Her first reflex was to wonder for who he bought those? She grimaced at the thought shaking her head to stop thinking about such non-sense. He stopped suddenly in front of a bakery and hesitantly he entered the empty pink building. It was so small she didn’t enter because he would see her for sure if she did. So she waited for him outside. He came out with a small pink box; it seemed like cake, strawberry cake maybe? He continued his walk and he stopped at the entrance of the city’s biggest park. He entered it with all of his belongings and he climbed the highest mount. At first, he sat down on the cold grass and then he lay down heavily. Hayi did the same but on the other side of the small mount. She looked at the dark sky and the little stars they could see even with the city lights of Seoul. She felt peaceful and connected more than ever to the stranger on the opposing side of this mount. She closed her eyes feeling slightly exhausted. When she opened them again she saw the back of the short man exiting the park. Quickly, she stood up and followed him in a rush. She couldn’t lose him now. He walked into a cards shop and she saw him picking a large one. He wrote a little note in it. He paid for it and he walked out fast. Why did he do all of this? Was it someone’s birthday? Perhaps, did he have a girlfriend? At the thought, she felt surprisingly extremely unhappy. He walked down their neighbourhood and stopped when he saw a cute little dog attached to the stairs of someone’s house. He put down his groceries and he went to the adorable animal.

‘’Princess, did you miss me?’’, he asked the animal with a heartfelt laugh.’’ You’ve been a bad little girl didn’t you? Or why else would they let you outside in such a cold weather again?’’

Hayi’s grin expended to each of her ears. It was such a heartwarming scene. It quickly became even more beautiful. Because Kyungsoo took out of his bag small baby earmuff’s he found at the grocery store and he put them on the ears of the Norfolk terrier. He laughed when he heard the happy barking sounds his companion made afterwards. He patted the head of the pet one last time before standing up and taking all of his things to go. She literally had stars in her eyes. He was such a wonderful being. He then stopped a couple of blocks down from the library in front of an old house. He put the cake and the flowers on the porch in front of the main door of the house. He also took the card to put it in the mail box next to the door. Hayi’s happiness slowly faded. Who was the one receiving all these gifts from him so late at night? But she saw that before walking down the stairs of the house he made sure to ring. He then quickly hid behind one of the many bushes surrounding the entrance. An extremely old woman came out of the door and then she saw the gifts. Tears started to fall on her cheeks; she slowly took each one of them.

‘’ Oscar I knew you were still alive somehow.’’, she croaked while crying ‘’ Daisies, just like when we first met 60 years ago, happy anniversary.’’ The old woman looked at the sky with a sad expression on her face like she was waiting for it to answer.

She smelled the flowers one last time and closed the door after taking everything. Hayi’s face was wet after she saw this. She felt foolish. How could she be jealous of such a beautiful present? She didn’t exactly know who this woman was but she understood that her friend definitely wasn’t the Oscar the older woman was talking about. Also, it was obvious that he did this gift for the aged woman so she could reminisce about her obviously deceased husband. What a kind soul he was. He walked away from the house with a smile on his face. Hayi now had an answer to her horrible dilemma.

‘’Let’s meet again, friend.’’, she whispered while looking at him disappearing in the distance.

It was insane for her to stay mad at this outstanding individual for such a irrational reason. She now understood that all along he did it for her well being.

Author's note: I wanted to updapte Checkmate on Halloween but that didn't work out well ¨>.<. Well I will post the first chapter and prologue in around a day or 2. Anyways I hope you enjoyed this chapter! I am loving the support i'm getting for this ship and this story. I love all of you and when you write me your oppinion I feel even more motivated ! I didn't respond to all of the comments but be assured I read every single one of them and they make me so happy and motivates me!