He ed up. He really ed up this time.

Of course he had made plenty of severely stupid and embarrassing mistakes before, but this now… this now was definitely a rock bottom. No, not a rock bottom – he had free access to modern technology (aka; clearly the most idiotic brain on this planet) so he obviously managed to drill a hole into the rock, making it possible to fall even deeper. He should have renamed himself into Murphy, since the Murphy’s law always worked so nicely for him.

Of course this was partly his fault. He drank way too much to be able to think clearly (or to think at all, it would seem) and that was certainly a recipe for all kinds of problems. He had been aware of that, but he honestly never imagined that it would make him do… what he had done.

But most of the fault… yes, most of the fault was Jeon Jungkook’s. The only reason Taehyung drank at all was because that spawn of Satan - who was accidentally also his roommate (Murphy’s law) - decided to show up at his cousin’s birthday party. If he remembered correctly (and he probably did) they got in a very intense verbal fight as soon as they saw each other.

Taehyung had been seating at the table in the corner of the club they were in, waiting for his friends to finally show up, when his enemy nonchalantly plopped on the seat opposite to him, his lips curled into that annoying smile of his.

Taehyung responded by giving him a glare. “What do you want?” he wondered as patiently as possible given the circumstances. He had been planning to have a peaceful night, which was something now turned out to be impossible. When Jeon Jungkook was around, the world always shrank to just the two of them - they were going to devote the evening to irritating each other, he just knew it.   

“Well…” slowly answered his enemy “…you looked lonely, so I decided to keep you company. You know… since  I’m such a pure soul.”

Taehyung narrowed his eyes. “Human trash you mean?” he wondered, trying to keep the irritation at his enemy’s presence out of his voice (and failing miserably). “Go annoy someone else Jeon.”

“I’m sure you confused me with yourself.” smiled Jungkook, clearly amused. Taehyung often had a feeling that his enemy actually enjoyed their constant bickering, and that mostly managed to worsen his already pretty bad mood. “And I don’t annoy, I bless. You should feel honored.” added Jungkook, pushing a small glass full of transparent liquid toward him. “Vodka.” he explained. “Something tells me you need it.”

So Taehyung drank (but only after he made Jungkook drink half of it - he was certainly not stupid) and the whole evening soon became a blur of light and colors and noises.

He didn’t remember much, but he was certain that he and his enemy kept themselves occupied by throwing insults at each other - which honestly wasn’t a shocker.

What was a shocker was that they went back to the dorms together and then started to furiously undress the moment after the door closed behind them. Despite the absurd amount of alcohol that had been pumping through his veins, Taehyung remembered everything from that moment on. He could almost feel how Jungkook’s hands traveled across his bare skin, the sensation at the moment their lips connected, the pressure, the…

He shuddered in disgust - which was probably a mistake, since the sudden movement somehow managed to startle his sworn enemy out the deep sleep. Taehyung had the privilege of being able to observe how he came to the same realization he had been stressing about for the past five minutes. It was impossible to not figure it out given how painfully obvious it all was – they were squeezed on the same bed, both and their limbs entangled (which was the only reason Taehyung was still lying there and not half way to Australia).

For a long minute they just stared at each other, neither of them knowing how to react. What was a proper procedure for after you woke up next to your greatest enemy? Screaming? Joking? Insults? Taehyung didn’t know and it seemed that Jungkook had the same problem.

The first one to get his together was Taehyung (though probably only because he was awake longer). “Move.” he ordered, trying to push his enemy away to be able to get off the bed (and then – obviously – run out of the room to immediately request a new one, preferably on the other side of the campus). If he had done that a minute before when Jungkook was still too distressed to cause problems, he would have probably succeeded. Now however…

His enemy’s reaction was the opposite of what Taehyung had wanted. He did move – no one could hold that against him – but he certainly didn’t move the way Taehyung told him to. One moment he was lying right next to him, their bodies pressed together, and the next he was on top Taehyung, holding his wrists above his head in the precisely the same manner than couple of hours ago. 

Taehyung could feel the heat on his cheeks and knew he was blushing. It was impossible not to since Jungkook’s action brought back unwelcoming associations to the events of the last night. He tried to free his hands and pull away, but his enemy’s grip was too strong. There was nothing he could do.

“Oh, I’m sorry.” said Jungkook, a small smile playing on his lips. “I thought this is what you meant by ‘move’.” Taehyung tried to protest – he really did – but he realized it was impossible at such proximity and with absolutely no fabric between them. It was so much easier to just give in, to raise his head so his mouth was closer to Jungkook’s, to let their lips connect, to wrap his arms around his enemy as soon as his wrists were finally free.

What was not easy was to push Jungkook away, but he did it anyway. He wasn’t sure why – perhaps because it all became too much or he fully realized who he was kissing and what consequences that could have. He didn’t dwell on it: it wasn’t the right kind of question to have at this point – the right question was why he kissed Jungkook in the first place.

He pushed himself into a seating position and hastily moved away from his enemy, on the far edge of the bed. He didn’t stand up because he was still and really didn’t want Jungkook to see. The fact that he had already seen didn’t play a big role in his decision.

“Why?” he choked out, his voice surprisingly weak. He wasn’t even sure what he was asking.

Jungkook tilted his head and gave him a look that could be easily interpreted as worried. “Because you want it.” he said. “And I want it.”

“I don’t.” retorted Taehyung, not entirely sure that was actually the truth. “I hate you.” he continued (not entirely convinced that was true either). “And you hate me.” he took a deep breath before finishing; “So we can’t want it.”

Jungkook responded by slightly raising his left eyebrow. “I don’t hate you.” he said calmly. “And you don’t hate me either.”

“How can you tell?” Taehyung noticed that his voice sounded strangely empty. Perhaps because he didn’t really know what to think; his enemy had just admitted that he didn’t hate him and he seemed to have been convinced that Taehyung didn’t hate him either. Even a genius would be confused.

“How can you not?” retorted Jungkook, looking at him with a sort of intensity Taehyung wasn’t able to clearly interpret.

“I don’t…” he started, stopping when he realized that he didn’t really know what to say. “I mean…” he tried again but gave up a second later. He really wasn’t sure what a proper respond to that was. He didn’t even know what he felt. He had been convinced that he did, but it turned out that he actually had no idea. “What now?”

Jungkook who was still looking at him with that strange intensity, carefully moved closer to him and reached for his hand. Taehyung flinched when he intertwined their fingers, but didn’t pull away.  “Now…” quietly said Jungkook “… you come to terms with the fact that you don’t hate me.” He leaned closer, so close that the corner of his mouth touched his cheek. “Then…” he whispered in his ear. “… we do this again.”

 “And then?”

Jungkook curled his lips upwards. “One step at a time.” was all he said before he stood up and slowly started to get dressed, seemingly not bothered by the fact that Taehyung was able to see him.

Taehyung averted his gaze towards the window, absently observing the clouds in the sky.

One step at a time.