Chapter 18 – Being Disillusioned

Hakyeon knows he needs to decide whether he trusts Hongbin or not. He’s watched Sanghyuk and Hongbin wrestle on the floor. Watched Leo and Sanghyuk fight over who got to sit on the apprentice’s lap. Watched Hongbin and Leo tease Ravi when he visited. He’d seen all three of them look pathetic as they waited for him to finish cooking dinner.

He realizes as he watches Hongbin scold cat-Leo for being mean to puppy-Sanghyuk that he does trust the apprentice and that he’s ready to tell Hongbin.

“Hongbin,” he says. “I have to tell you some stuff.”

Hongbin seems surprised but Hakyeon notes that he also looks like he’d been expecting it. Leo pushes away a clingy Sanghyuk and joins Hakyeon on the armchair.

“Is this going to be about where you and Leo go?” Hongbin wonders as he takes a seat on the couch.

“Yes,” Hakyeon answers simply. “I’m going to tell you everything.”

Hongbin listens with great interest as Hakyeon talks about the palace. He’d grown up just a short walk away from the huge building and he’d always wondered what it was like inside. He wasn’t prepared for the truth, for what the king was like and the things that went on or the details of the war.

When Hakyeon begins talking about the prince’s plans however, Hongbin frowns. And when Hakyeon tells him what he’d been doing for years and what it had taken to get to this point, he’s unsure of what to think of the sorcerer.

“Let me get this bit straight,” Hongbin starts. He’s leaning back in his seat, a little cautious of Hakyeon. “You’ve gone to every known sorcerer and taken away their magic?”

“Yes.”

“And then released the creatures they were holding?”

“Yes.”

“I get the creatures part, but why are you taking their magic?”

“Do you have any other solutions?”

Hongbin thinks. Actually he takes his time about it and Hakyeon is a little grateful that he seems to be trying to find another way instead of just stating that Hakyeon’s way was wrong.

“No,” Hongbin finally answers. “I can’t think of anything.” He still didn’t like it though.

“The prince is outlawing magic anyway. The sorcerers in this country are corrupt in all senses of the word and they won’t stop using magic and hurting creatures just because a law says so.”

Hakyeon waits for Hongbin to say something but the apprentice remains silent. “Did you ever wonder why Ravi is so busy?”

He hadn’t. At least not since he’d first met the potion-maker and wondered why people would buy from someone who wasn’t a sorcerer. He realizes now that Ravi was nearly the only place they could buy potions from, the only other being the palace, now that there weren’t many sorcerers.

Hakyeon had never said, but Hongbin assumed Ravi had some role in the prince’s plans. Did Ravi know he had a role in the plans? Hongbin feels his heart twist when he considers the possibility that Ravi was as morally corrupt as Hakyeon. He dismisses it instantly.

“Why are you teaching me magic if you’re just going to take it from me?” Hongbin demands suddenly, only now having the thought.

“I want you to help me,” Hakyeon tells the apprentice honestly, he’d been thinking about this a lot lately, what role Hongbin would have if he kept him around.

Hongbin’s breath escapes him in a disbelieving huff. How could he help Hakyeon? He runs his hands through his hair, he can’t hear any more of this. He’s had enough for today.

“I…I need to think about everything for a bit. If that’s okay.”

“That’s fine. Leo will take you to Ravi’s if you want.”

Hongbin considers it and nods. He has questions he wants to ask the potion maker about everything. He knows Ravi has tried to be honest with him from the start so he feels like he should give the older man a chance.

As Hongbin stands up his eyes meeting Hakyeon’s again. “Did you go to my teacher’s house too?” he asks. He doesn’t know why he hadn’t considered it until this moment. Hakyeon had said ‘all sorcerers’ so why hadn’t he considered the possibility that his old teacher had been a target?

Leo stretches as he gets to his feet and then disappears from the room but nobody takes note of him.

“Mmm,” Hakyeon confirms. “He got away though.”

“Oh…” Hongbin mutters, conflicted.

“He’s not a nice person, Hongbin,” Hakyeon says. “It’s where we got Sanghyuk.”

“What?” Hongbin demands, eyes flashing to Sanghyuk.

Sanghyuk wags his tail at the apprentice. He’d been listening the whole time, wondering what Hongbin would think. Like Leo, Sanghyuk could admit he was biased. He was on Hakyeon’s side until the end, until there were no more sorcerers.

“He was there the whole time you were, stuffed in a cage that–”

“Stop!”

Hongbin doesn’t want to know. He can’t. He doesn’t think he could handle knowing what his seniors and teacher had been doing to Sanghyuk in the basement despite them being so kind to him. They had been so helpful, so friendly, even if they’d spent all day down there.

What kind of judge of character was he if he hadn’t even known? How many times had he used ingredients harvested from creatures that were tortured beneath his feet?

Sure, he’d found out months ago that there were creatures in the basement and he hadn’t liked it, but he’d never considered there being top-level creatures. He didn’t want to think of a caged Sanghyuk, he liked looking at a happy teen and puppy and seeing only that, not the torture he must have faced. He wonders if Hakyeon feels the same way when he looks at Leo.

Feeling like he’s been disillusioned to a great number of things he’d looked up to – the palace, his teacher and seniors, even Hakyeon a little – Hongbin can’t take any more for today.

Leo reappears then, this time he’s in his human form. He doesn’t hesitate to grab the apprentices arm and teleport straight away.

Hongbin hadn’t realized how late at night it was until he and Leo landed in Ravi’s shop. How long had Hakyeon been talking?

“Come back safely,” Leo murmurs, turning on the light before teleporting back home.

Hongbin frowns. If he decides he’s against Hakyeon what will the sorcerer do to him? Does he have a reason to be against Hakyeon? Now that he knew more about the king and sorcerers he could see the appeal to the plan... but were all sorcerers bad? Hongbin considered himself to be an alright guy.

“You’re going to ruin your handsome face if you keep that frown there any longer.”

The apprentice flinches, eyes snapping up to see Ravi standing in the doorway to the work room.

“Ravi,” Hongbin replies, not even hearing the compliment.

“What’s wrong?” the potion maker asks. “Do you even know what time it is?”

Hongbin sighs. He should ask his questions now while he has the chance.

“Hakyeon told me everything.”

“Everything?” Ravi asks with raised eyebrows. He’s sort of expected Hakyeon to keep Hongbin in the dark a little longer.

“Yeah,” Hongbin murmurs. “I was wondering where you stood on it all. You’re involved, right?”

Ravi runs a hand through his hair with a deep breath. “I am. I’m more involved in the ‘after’ aspect of it all though. I’ll basically just make health potions until everything is running smoothly. After that I’m banned from potion making.”

Hongbin’s jaw drops. “You… You’re not going to make potions anymore? Why?”

“Magic will be outlawed. That includes potions. I don’t mind too much, doing something else could be interesting.”

“But...”

But you’re so passionate about it, Hongbin says to himself. How could Ravi give up potions? Hongbin loved them too. It was unfair. He’d only been able to work on potions for two years and now he’d found out that he’d no longer be able to do that in the near future.

Ravi smiles at Hongbin. “I’ve been making potions my whole life. And don’t you think it would be interesting to travel? My mum is from a different country. She used to always talk about it all the time and I’d love to see it all.”

Hongbin hadn’t known that Ravi’s mum was from a different country. It was incredibly rare considering the borders had been closed for hundreds of years, had she snuck in? He supposes he probably should have guessed it though, going by Ravi’s hair and blatant disregard for the capital and king.

Hongbin had grown up loving his country and the king. Until meeting Hakyeon he’d never thought there was anything wrong with the way everything worked here. He knows that his perspective must have been changing slowly since arriving, but it felt like he’d only learned everything today.

“Did Hakyeon ask you to help?” the potion maker wonders before Hongbin can start pondering everything again.

“Yeah,” he answers quietly.

“Are you?”

“I don’t know.”

He’s still trying to weigh the pros and cons but his mind is too full. He notices then how tired he feels. He’ll sleep on everything and finish asking Ravi things tomorrow. What does Ravi want him to do?

Ravi sees the decision get made and offers his hand out to the younger man. With a sigh Hongbin puts everything out of his mind and takes Ravi’s hand, letting himself be led upstairs.

“I feel like I haven’t seen you for ages,” he whines.

Ravi scoffs. “You saw me two days ago.”

“Do you even miss me at all?” Hongbin demands pretending to be petulant.

Ravi grins and pulls them to a stop at the top of the stairs. “Of course,” he replies instantly.

Hongbin scrunches up his nose at him and heads over to the bed, flopping down on it ungracefully.

“Hey,” the potion maker complains. “Where am I supposed to sleep?”

Normally Hongbin made up a futon on the ground when he stayed over, today he was changing that. He was sick of pretending that neither of them felt anything.

He lifts his head and gives Ravi an unimpressed look. “You’re so clueless. Come here.”

Pretending he can’t feel the heat on his cheeks Ravi sighs and joins Hongbin on the bed. The apprentice bites his lip to hide a grin and shifts closer to Ravi.

“You’re pretty cute for an older man,” Hongbin whispers teasingly.

There was no point pretending he wasn’t blushing now, Ravi’s pretty sure Hongbin could feel the heat radiating off his face.

“Just go to sleep,” he mutters, rolling so his back is to the apprentice.

“Is that all you have to say?” Hongbin grumbles playfully.

“…You’re pretty cute too,” Ravi finally says.

Hongbin is glad Ravi can’t see the stupid grin he has on his face as he wraps his arms around his waist. “Goodnight.”

Ravi pulls Hongbin closer. “Goodnight.”