Butterfly Kisses 

“Stop mumbling to yourself.”

Yongsun whips her head around to glare at her friend seated behind her, but only a bored expression greets her. She should have known better. They have been friends and classmates for a whole year and she knows that intimidation doesn’t work with Hyejin. She’s way too collected. Her mere presence is probably more intimidating than Yongsun snapping.  

“How about some help instead?”

Hyejin scoffs, “How?”

Yongsun has no idea either. Crushes are normal, but an actual boy looking to date her?

Woah.

“Don’t you think it’s embarrassing to kiss someone? Especially boys? They are so foreign?”

Hyejin falls silent and seems to be seriously considering the prospect.

“Nope.”

Yongsun glares again. “Of course you wouldn’t.”

“What?” Hyejin drawls.

Yongsun shrugs. Hyejin is lazy in a feline way, but not truly like a cat. She is something more but Yongsun can’t put a finger to what exactly.  

“What?” Hyejin repeats, more insistent this time.

“Because you’re always cool, so you’d know.” Hearing herself, she knows her words don’t make sense, but whatever.  

“Know what? I’m not boy crazy like the bunch of you.”

“You aren’t but boys are crazy about you.”

Hyejin raises an eyebrow, cracks a half-smile in that silly Hyejin teasing way. Yongsun pouts in reply. That smile meant that Hyejin found whatever she just said hilarious. However, she doesn’t see how it’s funny when that was the truth. 

Hyejin is a lot of things, and there are lots of talk surrounding her. She’s mysterious and edgy. Her confidence wafts and swirls around her. Boys want her and girls are mostly wary when she’s in the equation. Girls, in general, except for Yongsun.

“Just accept the dude.” Hyejin sounds absolutely done, but Hyejin always does when it comes to Yongsun. “Why are you even thinking about kissing before you date him?”

“Hyejinnie.” Yongsun activates her aegyo. Whining, she grasps her friend’s hand.

“Yes?”

“What should I do?”

Hyejin laughs and escapes from Yongsun’s grasp. Out of habit, Yongsun whines a little again.

“Don’t be so cute-” Hyejin’s eyes are twinkling, her default ‘fight me’ expression replaced by something softer and cheesier. “-but stupid at the same time.”

“Hey!” Offended, Yongsun is about to hit Hyejin when her friend reaches forward and squeezes her cheek.

“Just date him.” Hyejin shrugs, letting go of Yongsun’s cheeks.

As if on cue, the boy in question walks by their classroom, stopping to cast Yongsun a wide smile and a wave.

That is enough material for the cheeky bunch in class to sound the alarm, with an explosive uproar of catcalls and exaggerated smooching sounds. As expected from a bunch of fourteen year olds.

Yongsun plops her arms on the table and buries her head in them. Heat spreads from her cheeks to the tips of her ears and embarrassment tints her neck.

She wonders how long the teasing will go on for, but before she can come up with an estimate, an abrupt hush swallows the noise.

She steals a glance.

Everyone’s looking in her direction but not at her.

Behind her, Hyejin is off her seat, sweeping her fierce glare across every single one of their noisy classmates.

“Grow up,” she scoffs and everyone shuts up.

Hyejin is amazing. Even Yongsun is in awe.

“Let’s go.”

By the time Yongsun reacts, she is already out of the classroom and climbing up the stairway to the school’s roof.

“Wait! Where are we going?”

“For some air. Our classmates are jerks.”

The roof access is usually locked and Yongsun doesn’t ask why Hyejin has a duplicate key. They say Hyejin is mysterious, it’s true. But she’s also Yongsun’s dearest friend.

“Classes start soon,” Yongsun mumbles and stretches. Hyejin’s right, the cool air feels good and it clears out some unnecessary thoughts.

“We can skip…” Yongsun shakes her head, rejected. “We’ve fifteen minutes, chill Yongsun.”

With that, Hyejin plants her on the floor and Yongsun is glad that their skirts are a shade of dark grey. She worries about Hyejin sometimes, yet chooses not to tell her.

But as she looks at her friend, nonchalant and free, a thought suddenly strikes her.

“Hyejin, honestly, have you kissed a boy before?”

Hyejin tilts her head, expression neutral. “Why?”

Yongsun isn’t all that sure why, she just thought she should know. They are really close friends after all.

"What does it feel like? To kiss a boy? ” Yongsun decides to assume Hyejin did. She should have, since she’s never flustered around boys or any kind of attention lavished on her.

“Something like two human lips touching?”

Yongsun snorts. Hyejin has a funny way of putting things. And she likes it, she likes how Hyejin doesn’t blend into the crowd as a typical girl, how she doesn’t conform to the many rules. Yongsun likes how different they are and how they seem to have something special when together.

“I’m so nervous about kissing though? Like I have to be so close to him, what if I freak out and back away? That’d be so mean.”

“Tie a rope around your waist and tie the other end to him?” Hyejin suggests, looking every bit genuine about it.

“Hyejin!”

“I don’t know, Yongsun. Stop being so paranoid, try dating him first.” Hyejin shakes her head. “Well, if you do want to date him.”

Yongsun sighs. She isn’t certain if she actually wants to. The idea of dating someone, the idea of romance seems so enticing but when the chance presents itself to her, it’s actually a little scary.

Everything is so foreign and Yongsun swears she will embarrass herself tremendously if she dates him. Just imagining it makes her cringe.

“Yongsun,” Hyejin says, motioning for her to come closer. Yongsun squats down carefully, in front of her friend, making sure her skirt doesn’t touch the floor. “Stop thinking. Do and don’t think.”

All of a sudden, the way Hyejin’s lips curve and move while she speaks hypnotises Yongsun. Her lips are so pretty. 

“Can you kiss me?” Yongsun blurts out.

Do and don’t think, she says.

Awkwardness paints her a bright shade of pink, her heart is palpitating. And Hyejin’s blank response isn’t helping at all.

“Um- I just- practice? I don’t know? I-”

“Yeah, sure.”

Hyejin swoops in, and before Yongsun even thinks about backing away, Hyejin’s lips is on hers.

It feels nothing like the apathetic ‘two human lips touching’.

Her lips are soft, almost fluffy like, and Yongsun loses the ability to think about anything more. Hyejin’s really close and she really likes it. The way one of Hyejin’s hands is on her shoulder, lightly clutching her blouse. The other hand on her neck, her fingers grazing Yongsun’s skin.

It feels so tender. So sweet.

She wants this moment to stay put, but Hyejin breaks away just as Yongsun’s hands circle around her waist.

“It’s… not as bad as I thought. This kissing thing,” Hyejin whispers, catches Yongsun’s eyes and looks away.

“Um…”

What does that mean? Yongsun stares, confused.

“We should go. Classes.”

Just like how she was pulled to the roof, Yongsun gets dragged back to class, totally out of it.

What did Hyejin mean? 

Yongsun sneaks a peek at Hyejin, who has reverted to her signature unbothered look. As though nothing happened, like they didn’t just kiss.

I’m her… first kiss?

Yongsun’s breath hitches when Hyejin returns her gaze. Quickly turning back, her face heats up as the sensation of their shared moment returns.

Thoughts of the boy asking her out and worries about kisses are all being shoved out of her head.

All she can think about now is her friend with the nonchalant air, Ahn Hyejin.