Fall 1

Before the dawn. Before the dawn.

I stared into the mirror, glaring at myself to make sure I got all the moves right. My first mistake. 

I ended up missing a part. I stop the music, slamming the button. Let your body flow with the rhythm naturally, I reminded myself.

Barely catching my breath, I take a swig from my bottle and throw it to the side. I hit the start button and immediately get into position. I once again watch myself in the mirror and am satisfied.

Because I listen to my heart, heart, heart

At that point, my heartbeat felt almost too irregular and I was practically taking in gulps of air but I paid no mind. 

This is the part. 

Lying down on the floor on my stomach, I then push up myself, while sticking my left leg out behind me. Too much. It's too much.

I collapse onto the floor of the studio, taking in rapid breaths of air. The song ends abruptly just as Sunggyu's part comes on. 

"Again?" Kkotip appeared by my side, holding my bottle in one hand and the other on my shoulder. One of her eyebrows was raised and I raised both of mine in response, making her chuckle. "I told you again and again. You can't do this type of choreography anymore," she nagged.

I shrugged while rolling my eyes and she propped me up. As I slowly got up, she walked towards the stereo and turned it off. "Take in deep, slow breaths. You've got to get your breathing technique right, especially in your current condition." She glanced at me. "By the way, no more Infinite songs. I'm serious this time."

"Why?" I whined, wiping away my sweat with a towel. A scowl was thrown my direction and I kndw the answer already. I relaxed my weight on my arms behind me while spreading my legs out in front of me.

"The choreography's too intensive." There goes the same answer over and over again.  It didn't matter anyways. I could always sneak in without her knowing. 

"Now, you, pack up and go back home. Practice is over," Kkotip ordered, pulling me to my feet. 

As I tossed all my equipment and slung my jacket on my shoulder, I remembered. "But I've got to get to work. I promised Mum already." An image of Mum and Dad tirelessly serving countless of customers at our restaurant flitted through my mind and I felt obliged to help them.

A warm smile spread on Kkotip's lips as she assured me, "Nah, I think you've strained yourself. She'd understand. See you tomorrow. Love you."

With that, she turned the lights off and left me in the dark.

Only then, I realised that I didn't ride my car here. I looked momentarily at the clock. 7.00pm. "Aish, seriously." 

*

It was exactly as how I imagined. A body-pressing crowd in the bus. I could barely move or even breathe, which definitely didn't help my lung condition. The stench of sweat mixed with smoke suffocated me.

It's just two more stops, I encouraged myself, trying my best to not touch the ahjussi's bare arm next to me.

In an attempt to divert my attention from my disgust, I peered out the window. My gaze landed on an advertisement plastered on another bus but what caught my attention the most was the group