A/N: So this is an...experiment of sorts. I was inspired by this Yanxi Palace fic but this is a popular fic format in Chinese, where there are 50 questions an imaginary interviewer poses a couple and they answer them separately. Sometimes the interviewer's responses are written in, almost like the writer's commentary, but I find that breaks the immersion so I opted not to. I translated the original questions, except that I changed 16 which I found too similar to another question, and added 34 and 37, which were missing from the original.

I've been working on this for a while because I was stuck on a few questions, but I really wanted to finish it by today as a Valentine's Day present. So - Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!

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1. What’s your name?

Taeyeon: Kim Taeyeon.

Jessica: Jessica but you can call me Ms. Jung.

 

2. What’s your age?

Taeyeon: Korean or international?

Jessica: I’m the same age as this midget.

 

3. What’s your gender?

Taeyeon: I know fans call me oppa but female.

Jessica: Female.

 

4. What’s your personality like?

Taeyeon: I guess I’m a bit conflicted. I want to be alone but I’m scared of being alone. I want to not rely on others but I wish I could rely on others. Sometimes I feel like I don’t know what I want, yet when something happens that I thought I wanted I ended up disappointed. Or the other way around. I confuse myself at times, not to mention other people.

Jessica: I’m straightforward to the point of being blunt, and sometimes people take that the wrong way. I’m kind of an all or nothing person when it comes to relationships, including friendships: either I want to 100% be your friend or I just don’t want anything to do with you. I don’t do middle grounds well.

 

5. What’s the other person’s personality like?

Taeyeon: As lame as it is to refer to our group nicknames, she really does come off as an ice princess until you get close enough to melt the ice. Then she can be a huge marshmallow, even if she won’t admit it. But she will stab icicles into your eyes if you get on her bad side. Trust me on that. She’s very quick-witted even if she reacts a beat late half the time, she’s funny, especially when it comes to making fun of people – ahem, me – and she’s also way more erted than she wants to admit.

Jessica: To put it succinctly, Taeyeon is a big ball of angst wrapped up in a small body. She doesn’t see her virtues and just lingers on her flaws. She gives and gives until she has nothing left and still doesn’t think she’s doing enough. She’s one of the bravest people I know, but she would never think that of herself, of course. The only ‘most’ title she’d admit to is being the most erted, which she really shouldn’t be so proud of. But she should be proud of herself overall. I am.

 

6. When did you first meet? Where?

Taeyeon: It was in S.M., when we were trainees together. We were supposed to get more formally introduced later that day, but for some reason she saw me, or I should say heard me, during an individual vocal practice.

Jessica: We were trainees in S.M. and I took a wrong turn and ended up passing by a practice room where I heard her singing.

 

7. What was your first impression of the other person?

Taeyeon: Her resting face is kind of scary.

Jessica: For such a small girl, she sure has a set of pipes on her.

 

8. What do you like about the other person?

Taeyeon: Her…assets. [coughs]

Jessica: I’m on the shorter side but she’s even shorter than me so she makes me feel taller.

 

9. What do you dislike about the other person?

Taeyeon: She doesn’t appreciate my incredible sense of humour.

Jessica: She’s a ert who likes puns way too much.

 

10. Do you think you’re compatible with the other person?

Taeyeon: Wait, let me look up Pisces and Aries compatibility…

Jessica: What is this, a horoscopes column? We’re together, aren’t we? If we weren’t compatible, I don’t see how we could have stayed together for this long.

 

11. What do you call the other person?

Taeyeon: Sica.

Jessica: Tae.

 

12. What do you hope the other person calls you?

Taeyeon: Taengoo, in her aegyo voice.

Jessica: [blushes, says in a small voice] Baby.

 

13. What animal do you think the other person is like?

Taeyeon: A cat. But not just a regular house cat. Maybe one of those half-wild ones, what are they called? Savannah cats. Yeah, one of those.

Jessica: Something small and pathetic but still cute. A hamster? Or a chinchilla. Yeah, she seems like she’d like sand baths.

 

14. If you bought a gift for the other person, what would you get?

Taeyeon: Sica’s been into sleep masks lately, so maybe one of those. Just something small but useful.

Jessica: A pen, or a cactus.

 

16. What’s one thing you would change about the other person, if you could?

Taeyeon: She wouldn’t worry that she’s not enough to make me happy, or just not enough for me in any way.

Jessica: She would believe in herself more, and feel more comfortable about relying on others and going to them for help.

 

17. What’s your biggest flaw?

Taeyeon: I retreat into myself too much.

Jessica: I get too sensitive about things.

 

18. What’s the other person’s biggest flaw?

Taeyeon: She takes things too personally.

Jessica: She puts too much blame on herself and too little trust in others.

 

19. What does the other person do that makes you unhappy?

Taeyeon: Sometimes she gets really passive-aggressive rather than just directly saying what she’s upset about.

Jessica: When she gets into a negative state and berates herself endlessly over something rather than coming to us and letting us help her.

 

20. What do you do that makes the other person unhappy?

Taeyeon: Getting into one of my funks and not going to her.

Jessica: I can get petty and prickly and take it out on her when I shouldn’t.

 

21. Where has your relationship progressed to?

Taeyeon: Like…physically?

Jessica: We got married and adopted 10 children together. What do you think?

 

22. Where was your first date?

Taeyeon: It was at a little noodle stall in the street.

Jessica: We went to one of those noodle shops that are everywhere along the street.

 

23. What was the atmosphere like then?

Taeyeon: I mean, at the time, I don’t think we both knew it was a Date. I thought of it like that, wishfully, in my head but I couldn’t treat it like one. Even so, I still think of it as our first date. It went how a lot of our dates do: she makes fun of me, yet I end up paying.

Jessica: It wasn’t officially a date or anything, so we didn’t do things like hold hands or kiss, obviously, but it was…special. Being with Taeyeon isn’t about the occasion; it’s just about being with her.

 

24. How did things progress that time?

Taeyeon: The thing I remember most vividly is that at one point I had a piece of noodle stuck to the corner of my mouth and she wiped it off with her hand. I always found that super cheesy in dramas but when the person you like does it to you… Well, I understand why it’s a popular scene in dramas now.

Jessica: We kind of fought over the bill, but she insisted on paying so I let her in the end. I found that really sweet. I mean, not because of the money aspect, just that she wanted to treat me. Even though that noodle stall was just like any other one, every time I passed by it again I always took another look at it.

 

25. Where do you usually go for dates?

Taeyeon: Just one of our places. Sometimes we’ll go for a walk along the river or go up to the roof. Privacy is hard to find for people like us, as you can imagine.

Jessica: My apartment or hers, typically. If it’s a more special occasion, we might go to a restaurant with good privacy.

 

26. What would you do for the other person’s birthday?

Taeyeon: Invite our close friends over for a small party. Buy her favourite foods and drinks. Just something intimate but fun.

Jessica: She got me some lingerie ‘for Christmas’ which I swear was just an excuse to see me in skimpy clothes. So I guess I’d wear them and…surprise her for her birthday.

 

27. Who confessed first?

Taeyeon: Jessica did.

Jessica: I did, of course. Do you expect Kim Taeyeon to admit her feelings first?

 

28. How much do you like the other person?

Taeyeon: So much it scares me sometimes.

Jessica: More than I think she knows. Or well, she should know but maybe she doesn’t believe it, which makes me sad.

 

29. Then, do you love them?

Taeyeon: Yes.

Jessica: Of course I do.

 

30. What does the other person say that makes you feel like you’re done for?

Taeyeon: Taengoo~

Jessica: [blushes] Baby.

 

31. If you think the other person fell for somebody else, what would you do?

Taeyeon: [sheepishly] I…may have cast some doubts before, and I learned my lesson.

Jessica: We’ve had this fight before so – no comment.

 

32. Can you forgive the other person for falling for someone else?

Taeyeon: …are you eating spaghetti with Tiffany again?

Jessica: Taeyeon knows better than that. And I swear, if she brings up Tiffany, the couch is that way.

 

33. If the other person is late for more than an hour, what would you do?

Taeyeon: Wait. If I leave, I don’t want to imagine the consequences.

Jessica: Reintroduce her to the couch.

 

34. What does the other person do to get you to do something for them?

Taeyeon: She just has to pout and whine a bit, really, and I cave in.

Jessica: Taeyeon usually tries to butter me up, and then she says I ‘extort’ her, but she’s the one asking me for a favour, okay?

 

35. What’s the other person’s y expression like?

Taeyeon: [eyes glaze over] Let’s just say, very, very alluring.

Jessica: The thing is, Taeyeon is better at being y purposefully onstage because it’s what the fans want and she can totally pull out another side of herself for them. But when she’s with me, she can never be y if she tries too hard, it just…happens in certain moments. And I’m not sharing what kinds of moments those are.

 

36. When the two of you are together, what makes your heart beat the fastest?

Taeyeon: When she gives me this certain look, it’s like she has stars in her eyes.

Jessica: When she puts her hand on the small of my back. There’s this spot that—well, she knows.

 

37. What would be your idea of an ideal date?

Taeyeon: Netflix and chill.

Jessica: Taeyeon’s kimchi fried rice and maybe a movie.

 

38. Doing what with the other person makes you feel the happiest?

Taeyeon: [eyes go out of focus] …isn’t this interview PG-13?

Jessica: This may sound weird but…bickering? Like, playfully, not actually arguing.

 

39. Have you ever fought?

Taeyeon: Oh, have we? Just look at how much money I’ve spent on flowers and chocolates.

Jessica: Oh yeah, loads of times.

 

40. What kind of fights were those?

Taeyeon: Oh, there are many kinds: the silly petty little argument, the cold drawn out battle of wills, the rare screaming match and more. Our fights can practically be a Jeopardy category.

Jessica: No matter what kind, Taeyeon loses to me.

 

41. How will you make up afterwards?

Taeyeon: [coughs] Well… [mutters to self] Gotta keep it PG.

Jessica: Let’s just say we tend to make up in the bedroom.

 

42. Do you still want to be lovers in the next life?

Taeyeon: Of course, if she doesn’t kill me for messing up something in this one.

Jessica: Yes, but at first I want us to try our bests to minimize regrets in this one.

 

43. When will you feel loved?

Taeyeon: As weird as it sounds, when she insults me. She has this way of making it very…affectionate, somehow.

Jessica: When she wants to say something but can’t and then kind of just looks at me but I know what she wants to say anyway. Also, when she hugs me or kisses me or—physically.

 

44. What’s your method of expressing love?

Taeyeon: I express it physically.

Jessica: I .

 

45. When do you feel like “she doesn’t love me anymore”?

Taeyeon: When I do something that disappoints her and she gives me this look, shakes her head and walks away. Or when she looks in my direction but not at me, but rather through me, almost.

Jessica: When she closes herself off from me. It’s like we exist in the same world but also not, if that makes any sense.

 

46. What do you think is a flower that suits the other person?

Taeyeon: Those flowers that grow on cacti. They’re beautiful and resilient but if you’re not careful you’ll prick yourself.

Jessica: Baby’s breath. They’re small and give this pure feeling. Well actually I don’t know why I’m associating her with purity but… I don’t know, I just think baby’s breath suits her for some reason.

 

47. Do you have any secrets from the other person?

Taeyeon: I have secrets from everyone, probably even myself if that’s possible.

Jessica: Yes, but nothing directly concerning us.

 

48. Where does your insecurity come from?

Taeyeon: The thought that she could be with someone better. Someone who treats her better and tells her ‘I love you’ more often and gives her the things she wants, even if she won’t admit that she wants them.

Jessica: I guess that I can’t be what she needs. I want to make her happy and secure and confident, but that’s not something that a person can do for someone else, even if it’s someone who they love and who loves them. I want all those things for her, but I can’t singlehandedly make them happen.

 

49. Is your relationship public or secret?

Taeyeon: Secret. There’s no other option.

Jessica: Secret. It’s for the best, of course, but I know we both spend quite a bit of time imagining a world where we could go public.

 

50. Do you think you can maintain your love forever?

Taeyeon: Yes, I do.

Jessica: Of course we can.

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A/N: I wrote a JeTi one first, and writing this was harder afterwards, partially because I didn't want any answers to be repetitive and mostly because the ship dynamics are just different. I found it interesting how different Jessica felt between the two fics, and how the overall mood differed - this one was definitely more erted hahhaa. I blame Taeyeon for that.

If you want to use these questions for your ship, be my guest!