Several cries of don’t cry resonated through the cold air, sniffs and hiccups meshed in a wave of loud weeps as thousands of girls sobbed along them. All of them could barely hold back their urge to cry, most of them were already a sobbing mess after they heard that painful, choked hiccup resounded from the cylinder gadget of a microphone.

Woohyun cried and cried, spilling even more tears the moment he heard their fans crying along. He wiped those tears away with his sleeve, he harshly chewed on his lips so he could prevent the sound from escaping his mouth, but then Dongwoo came to his side and side-hugged him in a manner of what he felt as a very warm comfort. And Woohyun just couldn’t help but let out a very shaky breath as he hitched to push back the hiccup that threatened to get out.

He deeply appreciated the gentle comfort from s as well as his fans, feeling more than grateful at how understanding they could be, but at the same time, Woohyun just wished they wouldn’t shower him with so much care, so much love—especially now that he was but a bucket of tears. Because it only made him spill more and more even without him intending to. He couldn’t even dare to lift his head up and made any kind of eye contact with the fans or the members or even any of them—because it hurt him. It hurt him badly. They did their best to cheer him up, to console the mess out of him, but he knew for a fact that none of them could do the job and appease to his  deep wound. In fact, they would only worsen and he hated it so much.

Woohyun’s wound was deeper than it seemed to be and a simple dab of medicine like the soft whispers of “it’s okay”s  and "don't cry" could never heal it.

Because he’s broken and shattered-- he didn’t think he could be mended in any way. Not as long as the contributing shard of pain had remained there, making it bleed endlessly.

Kim Sunggyu of course could only watch his best friend from afar; his heart more conflicted than ever as he moved his eyes away from the tearful sight. With a sting of pain in his heart, Sunggyu pulled himself back to the leader that he was and strutted heavily towards Dongwoo whom was sitting with Sungyeol at the edge of the stage. He crouched himself behind the crying dinosaur and with an aching heart, he wrapped his arms around Dongwoo with an only hope of calming the younger down.

And fortunately, the leader’s warmth did soothe the wild boy down. He finally felt his heart washed out with relief when Dongwoo had quietened. At least Dongwoo's fine then. He was the second worst weeper next to Woohyun that night. And just when he thought his heart could’ve rest a little from all the painful twist and ache, his own want to spill a tear or two finally pushed to the back of his mind, Woohyun just decided to tear even that chance away from him when his broken voice had cracked and resonated through the speakers—

“I’m—sorry. I’m really sorry.” He heartbreakingly apologized to the crowd and broke down once again. Sunggyu had very much felt the strong urge to stride down the way to his best friend, to pull him for a comforting nice embrace, but a part of him just hampered that thought. His heart told him to hug the boy, to comfort the younger from his crying but his mind did otherwise.

After all, why did he have to? All these while, Kim Sunggyu had thought that he was Nam Woohyun’s bestest friend ever, the one person the younger had trusted the most, the one friend he would turn to any time, be it at happy or sad moments. But maybe Kim Sunggyu had thought wrong. Just simply wrong.

Maybe he had claimed Woohyun to be his best friend, maybe he had, but maybe, just another maybe, it was just Kim Sunggyu being delusional. Because obviously Nam Woohyun never thought of him as one. Because if he had, he would’ve told him about all of these problems he spat out to the world even before this moment. Because if he had, he wouldn't allow himself to fall apart that extremely when he had had a friend to turn to, when he knew he had a shoulder to cry on.

Yes, it hurt him terribly to see his best friend crying senselessly, wailing loudly but it also hurt him all the same to find out that he was in fact, very much not needed by the said friend. It hurt him so so bad, that it had Sunggyu internally crying in his heart. But in the end, it still remained an unheard cry, because he’s the leader of Infinite and a leader doesn’t cry.

Even after the end of their double encore, Woohyun had never stopped crying. His eyes were already red and swollen from the endless tears and Sunggyu held himself back from sneaking a glance at the said male. He knew the moment he were to place his gaze at that tear-soaked face, his hurting heart would falter and he would’ve crumbled right then and there and cried alongside with him. Nam Woohyun was indeed still his best friend after all. He’s the only person he could turn to when he felt his strong leader façade was wavering. Woohyun’s the only person he would allow to see his golden rare tears. And he couldn’t let that happen. He was hurt too, and the fact that Nam Woohyun’s the sole reason to his wounded heart was all the more reason he couldn’t break in front of him.

That’s why when everyone had changed back into their usual garments, Sunggyu quickly announced to s to file into their van so they could return to their dorm as soon as possible—without casting even as much as a brief glance at his best friend. And the members of course didn’t miss a beat at the sudden but subtle change within their infamous friendship.

Because Woohyun was still crying and weeping, and Sunggyu just wouldn’t be there by his side to offer a simple comfort of a hug. It was indeed a strange sight to the members of Infinite but they just let it slide, because they thought it was only the spur of that moment for reasons only God knows why. But how much more wrong could they be because Sunggyu was very much hurt, betrayed and stubborn, and Woohyun was just not at his best to notice all these subtle changes of behavior from his leader.

Things just wouldn’t get any better for all of them.

Woohyun spent all of his time in his room, simply locking himself in the nest of what he called his second home. It had been a few days since the end of their concert and Woohyun still couldn’t piece himself back together. He refused to attend to his schedule, forcing the company to make amend and pulled him out of several events. He just couldn’t stop crying, and he didn’t have the heart, the courage to face the loving faces of his fans. Heck, he didn’t even dare to come out of his comfort zone to meet the worried gazes of s.

Myungsoo had come knocking on his door more than once, asking if he needed anything, if he’s even alive in that room of his. But when only a still silence answered his question, he gave up asking and left him all alone. He was sure Woohyun only needed some more time and they would give him all the time he needed as long as he would come back as their old Nam Woohyun.

But the thing was, Woohyun wasn’t sure if he would still remain as the same Woohyun he was a few days ago. He couldn’t help but feel himself changing, but what sort of change it was, he didn’t know. He just knew that he changed. And he was afraid of it. He felt himself pushed to the point of no return, a simple flick of a switch was all it needed before he could go beyond the irreparable, and he was scared.

He didn’t like this change and he didn’t know what to do. His parents had contacted him, had come to him because they were worried, but he couldn’t even spill a word about the fear that was surely growing in his chest. He was scared if his parents would see the change in him. He was afraid that this change would change those around him. In the end, Nam Woohyun was just afraid of changes.

After all, those mere simple changes were what had made him that way. A simple change of direction from him to the other members was what broke him bit by bit over the last year. A simple shift of his singing parts to be redistributed to the other members was what hit him hard. A simple change of his throat condition was what triggered the slump in him. A simple injury on his shoulder was what prevented him from having more dance parts. A simple bits and pieces of everything, and he already felt like everything was shattering.

It wasn’t just that though. There were more beyond all the heartbreak he felt over the year, and he would tell the world about it if it meant it could lessen the problem, heal the wound on his heart. But it wouldn’t. Woohyun snorted in the midst of his spilling tears. Whom was he kidding? What would telling anyone or anybody about his problem do to him? In fact, it would only be a burden to him, to them. And he didn’t need to add  more when they already had so much  on their plates. He was selfish enough as it was, he didn’t need to do more to prove it.

Woohyun broke down again as he slumped back against the cold wall. His empty gaze went right through the opposite wall while he let more tears trickle down his face. He knew it was his fault for being this weak, but what he didn’t know was, he just needed someone stronger for him to hold onto when he felt himself drowning. He just needed someone to listen to everything that made him weak, and let the other fill the gap in his heart with his or her warmth. It was as simple as that.

If only he realized, he would’ve known that that certain someone was his best friend and that friend was slowly yet surely getting away from his reach.

“Hyung.” Dongwoo called out as careful as he could. Sunggyu merely smiled at the second eldest and hummed gleefully. “Are you okay?” Dongwoo blurted out of the blue, probably never planning to be discreet at all. Sunggyu simply raised an eyebrow at the other male. “Why wouldn’t I be okay?” He questioned back but the other only shrugged his shoulder before he sat himself in the chair besides Sunggyu, looking at the elder through the huge mirror in front of them.

“I don’t know, hyung. You seemed strange.” Replied the other simply because he really didn't understand the way Sunggyu had behaved recently. His gleeful smile and laughter just seemed out of place to the eyes of the members and he's only voicing their worries out loud for their sake.

“I’m fine, Woo. No need to worry about me. You should be worried about your dongsaeng instead. Did Woohyun come out of his room already?” Sunggyu asked instead but only a soft and dejected shake of head had answered his question. “No. He didn’t. Hyung, why don’t you go in there and shake him out of it? You’re his best friend. I’m sure he would listen to you.” Dongwoo suggested worriedly but what seemed to be a friendly suggestion turned out to be a bitter medicine to the elder when his face had turned sour.

“He wouldn’t, Woo. I’m not his best friend.” Sunggyu’s smile changed from what seemed like elation at first to a dead one. And Dongwoo didn’t like that smile even one bit because it was that very same smile Sunggyu had put on whenever he came out of their CEO's room. They all just unitedly hated that smile from their deepest core.

“But—“ Dongwoo wanted to protest still.

“Woo, do me a favor and try to pull him out of it for me. I don’t want him to miss any more events than he already had. He’s been quiet for a year, he needed this comeback more than any of us.” Sunggyu told him and Dongwoo just wanted to object badly. He wanted to tell the elder to do it himself, since he’s after all Woohyun’s bestest friend. But the words were just stuck in his throat like a clog of lump when he saw the sad look gracing the elder’s face. A ‘what happened to them?’ didn’t fail to cross his mind at the thought of their broken friendship, or what’s left of them.Dongwoo was his friend too, but why wouldn't he tell him anything? Anything at all?

Dongwoo just couldn't help but sighed.

“Look, hyung. I don’t know why you’re being like this when Woohyun needs you the most, but try to snap out of it, hyung. He really needs you even if he doesn’t realize it himself.” Dongwoo tried to put some sense into their leader’s head, but when he got nothing but a somber, offended expression from the other, he sighed once again.

“Or at least, just be the leader that a member needs, hyung. Be a leader to him and bring back Woohyun to Infinite.” He said one last time before he gave the elder a soft pat on his shoulder and left him alone in the dressing room. Sunggyu turned his head back to the mirror and dropped his body back in his seat, slumping.

“I know he needs me, Woo. I know but I need him to realize that before I came to him. Can’t I be selfish once in a while? Can I not be his leader for a second but just a very good friend to him at least for this once?”

Sunggyu scoffed. Whom was he kidding? Of course he couldn’t escape that burden of being their leader. That burden that used to be something that he enjoyed doing because he loved every single of them, but somehow then, it just changed back to be the heavy burden that it always had been from the beginning. Being a leader suddenly seemed too much at moments like that, at moments when he would want anything but to be the leader that he always was and always will be.

Sunggyu faintly smiled into the mirror before he stood up and smoothened the creases on his pants. It was time to put back the cloak of a leader on his back. And for that, he needed strength—and he needed that strong façade too.

Yes, Kim Sunggyu was ready.

“Woohyun.” Their leader knocked on the door firmly. Myungsoo, Sungyeol and Sungjong were just expectantly waiting in the living hall, hoping that the sound of their leader would finally and magically swung that door open and reveal their Woohyun. But of course it wouldn’t. There’s no such magic in their leader’s voice.

“Nam Woohyun, open up this door this instant.” Sunggyu’s voice turned sterner with each passing second. He wouldn’t tolerate Woohyun’s selfish tantrum anymore. He was worrying everyone with his behavior and it had put a lot of different burdens on their heavy shoulders, on their pained hearts. Sunggyu knocked on the door again, louder and harsher this time. “Nam Woohyun!!” He yelled this time.

“H-hyung, you don’t have to yell at him.” Sungjong whom was frightened from the sudden raise of voice interrupted but he instantly muted himself when he earned himself a menacing glare from their leader. Leader, that’s what he was being right now.

“Nam Woohyun!!” His voice boomed and blared loudly in the confined space of their house. Before Sunggyu could bang his sore fist on the wooden door once again, it finally opened.

“S-sunggyu-hyung.” Woohyun’s voice was hoarse and shaky as he called out. Sunggyu’s gaze wandered from the top of Woohyun’s head to his toes, and he couldn’t help it when his heart agonizingly clenched the moment he saw how miserable the younger was.

Woohyun's eyes were just bright red and badly swollen which obviously was the result of his almost never ending crying. His face was sickeningly pale, pale to the point that almost all of his blood had drained out of the system underneath that dry, somber skin. His lips, his usually cherry red lips lost its charm as the color had faded to ghostly pallor as the lips were chapped and even slightly scarred. He probably had bitten and chew on his lips to bleed more than once already. His choice of outfit was no better than his state. He wasn’t even sure if Woohyun had ever washed himself and changed out of his clothes because he had this stench and creases that told him that he probably hadn’t done any of them ever since who knew when.

Sunggyu just sighed loudly.

“Woohyun.” His leader tone was back on cue. The called male spontaenously met Sunggyu’s gaze and Sunggyu just braced himself for what he was about to say.

“How long are you planning to stay this way?” He asked with a cold tone.

“Hyung!” Sungjong shouted, alarming their leader that his words were just too over the top for the currently weak hearted man.

“How long are you going to lock yourself in your room and burden your teammates with your childish tantrum, Woohyun?” But Sunggyu wouldn't stop there.

“Hyung, that’s totally unnecessary!” Sungyeol pulled on Sunggyu’s arm warily but the latter just harshly jerked his hand away and ignored the protest of the younger members. He looked straight into those exhausted orbs in front of him and continued his leader streak.

“How much longer were you planning to mess your own life in your fit of depression and heartbreak, Woohyun? How much further would you drag this on? Until you’re satisfied? But until when? When you already lost everything? When you already destroyed your career? Or when you had destroyed your life? When, Woohyun? When?” He spat. And Sunggyu just saw it. He just saw that tiny spark behind those lifeless orbs as his harsh, cruel words finally and ultimately sank in the other’s mind. That tiny spark of hurt flickered in those eyes, yet it hurt Sunggyu even more than he was because Sunggyu knew what his words would cost them. He knew what he was staking with every word he spat.

Their friendship. Their last bits of friendship.

“Sunggyu-hyung, you don’t really mean what you said, hyung.” Myungsoo broke out of his silence as he pulled the leader away from Woohyun’s trembling figure. Woohyun was trembling, shaking terribly. Was he crying? Or was it anger? They didn't know. Woohyun was keeping his head low.

“No, Myungsoo. I meant every single of them. And remember this too, Woohyun, while you're at it. Because I absolutely meant every single word when I said this—“ Sunggyu just clenched his fist strongly. “Infinite doesn’t need a member that would drag the team down. Infinite doesn’t need someone who would rather succumb into their own sadness and let the team suffer i