so i have my story. but do i want to share it? not necessarily. i'd rather keep to myself and just enjoy the company that comes. i look around at other people and see them happy and smiling, yet the other half of people seem just about ready to give up. and i wonder to myself, how people get to the states they're in. and the answer hits me. the very same thing that can make all those people glow with happiness can make them dim with pain. being human just means you'd have to take both ends of the deal. but i'm old enough to know that life doesn't always have to be two-faced. people chose their happiness, and they chose to be sad. that's how i see things anyway. is it not easy to snap out of sadness and be happy? even if you're just pretending? i've learned from personal experience that if you fake it long enough, it becomes real. like how your parents tell you not to make a face for too long or it can get stuck that way. when you come talk to me, i'm not looking for a long term commitment, or even a one night call. i just want to enjoy what ever time i may have with you. laugh and share stories. have a few drinks and good meals together. lets not pressure each other to give the other what we can't provide. in the end one of us will end up unhappy and cut off from the world. and since i've learned enough to know better, i'm sure that would be you. let's just be friends while fate allows us. and everything should pass over smoothly, no?