Hi guys,so this is my first post.I decided to write because I have no one to tell my problems to,well I do have some but most of them are busy with their own things and I don't feel like disturbing their privacy just to listen to my problems,so I write heheheh

A few weeks/days back has been so hard on me I must say.Well first,I have just finished my national exam a  few days ago and it took me so long to be on hiatus (five weeks++) just to struggle and revise three years of syllabus which is not easy.I struggled very hard so I could be able to answer those questions but my expectation slipped off.It wasn't easy as I thought.Basically when I sat the exam the only thing I think of is "I don't deserve this kind of question" and it kinda disappoints me when I don't have enough time to answer all questions for maths and so does for the languages,which requires me to write about 3 or 4 essays within 2 hours.I'm afraid of disappointing my parents again ( like I always did ) but after talking to my mom,I felt much better because she know I tried my best.I guess I can trust my mom now because me and my mom doesn't have that kind of relationship like every daughters would have done so now I can rely on my mom to tell my stories to hehe i'm kinda thankful for it.

The second one is,while I was taking a break from revising,I checked my instagram feeds and saw the news of Luhan leaving exo.I couldn't help but cry/sobbed so hard in front of my phone.Some of them thought I checked twitter well no because I'm on hiatus on twitter too that time.I cried,and my body was shaking hard I can't even imagine that situation.I was in a trauma since Jessica was kicked off from the company a few weeks before him and then he decided to leave too.I know he had to do that because of his health but I wonder why can't he be on hiatus like Sulli did.I wasn't expecting this at all.I have no other choice but to respect his decision eventhough my heart is torn apart.Well from 12 to 11 and now from 11 to 10,how am I supposed to feel.I really miss those days where there is no such thing happened.Bring me back to those days,anyone please! :'( I hope Luhan knows that no matter what,I will always love and respect him in whatever he does.Regardless to say,I'm only a fan.A FAN.I have no rights to stop him..

Third is,friends.I won't be mentioning their name here because I'm too kind oh well.I'm already annoyed to write about them here.I have a friend whose attitude is so I don't even know anymore.She always changes the topic whenever I'm trying to talk to her about my problems,well meaningless to say,she doesn't want to listen to my stories and all that so now I'm trying to distance myself from her just to let her know that she did something wrong.Next is a friend of mine who likes a guy,and that guy likes her too but they doesn't want tp admit that they're in love with each other and only want to be called as friends,not couple.It kinda annoys me because they have been posting many selfies together,going out together and still deny that they're actually in a relationship.I don't care to be very honest but what makes me sick was when my friend is trying to ignore us I mean ditch us because of that guy.I thought I'm the only one who feels this way but then two of my bestfriends noticed it too so I guess I'm not wrong.I'm the eldest in my group so I'm in charge of everything.I tried so hard to put us back together oh we're not really apart but to make us closer than we already are but my efforts are worthless because my friend doesn't seem to care.I'm still waiting for the right time to let out my anger since I'm already exploding inside.She's also have been changing from day to day which makes me sick,I can't even handle her anymore seriously if I can't control my anger I would have just shout to her and told her what are you even doing.

Wow its a full length post and I'm really ranting.Ugh sorry everyone I guess I feel slightly better after writing.