The news about Jiyong and Kiko were everywhere on my SNS accounts right now, and I can't help but feel... Idk inside. I don't hate the girl, but I don't like her either. I know all of us were trying to cope with it by saying: "Wish him happiness", "Hope they'll be happy together.", "Let him have his happiness."

Yes, I am his fan, and as a fan all I want as well is his happiness. But damn, I can't seem to find my heart to accept the fact that he is with her right now.

Maybe I became too drowned in the thought that He and Dara is real. Or maybe I felt that they were real. Maybe it's how I noticed the way every time he would look at her with those eyes, those quick glances when they're together in an occasion. They way he would smile with her actions with those lips. The way he will act whenever she's around. Yes, call me delusional but that's what I am feeling right now.

I know that most of us were trying to lie low about the issue and I am too. As much as I want to deny it, it's all in those photos. Many thoughts were running inside my head. Even if I deny about the thing by saying that it's fine with me if my DaraGon ship is not real, I am kidding myself. It hurts, deep down, it hurts. There's this chamber in my heart that's really breaking right now. I don't know what to do. I guess I should just accept it but I know that it will take time.

I am an appler and I will forever be one.