I really did ramble so much! I guess I feel like I really have a problem with GD because so many times something happens and my emotions get stirred to an unreasonable level. I really did feel sorry for him when I saw that post but then at the same time felt a little toyed with, just because, to me, he has many moods and his actions do not always match up with each other. I will see GD do something contradictory, and it will piss me off at first a little. It makes this person I really admire seem kind of like a phony or a liar. But then after a while I settle down and I think of my own life, and my own choices. I have contradicted myself many times, there are many decisions I have made that I look back on and cringe like I can't believe I did those things. With GD it's not even that serious. But when I think of myself, and I think of what I see GD doing it actually makes him seem like a more real, genuine, person than ever. That may not make sense. But what I mean is the fact that he kind of seems like a mess to me sometimes means we are definitely not getting a package that was made by the YG company, you know? We are getting a really real person. So when he says those things in interviews that really touch our hearts, or he goes out of his way for a fan, or he gives to a charity, it makes those things seem even more genuine, because we know he's doing it because he really wants to not because he is careful of his image. Because let's face it, he is just not careful of his image, lol!

Not rambling at all. It's true that he should go ahead and hold back personal details some. I guess when literally every moment is in the cameras with reality tv, paparazzi, and stage performances maybe he doesn't see the point in holding back more than the essentials. Or maybe at first it was cool because it was a tool to increase his presence in the industry, but it's just spiraled out of control before he realized. I also think something could be said of the fact that his path in life was kind of set in stone for him when he was still way too young to know of anything different, and when your pouring all your energy into getting to the top, no one warns you just what to expect once you are there.

Sorry not to keep going. But I stopped using IG so i don't know what happened after his birthday pics came out this year, but I kind of hoped people were tired of the GD Kiko stuff and maybe did not post as many negative comments, but did they? Is this why GD is upset? I hate to say it but even non famous people break up with people, cry about it to friends, then when those friends see them again with the person they just broke up with they kind of don't understand and aren't happy about it. With GD it's way worse it's threats, etc, and no one deserves that. And of course I know love and friendship is not simple, but their good friend Yoon posted the picture of kiko there and it's like to me no one had to post any pictures. They could have just taken the pictures and shared them with each other, you know? It's not like putting a bunch of stuff on social media makes it a good time, being there and having fun makes it a good time. I just feel anxious because I see GD just doing stuff and maybe because he has been in the public eye so long he can't put certain things into perspective (like what share what not to), but sometimes I just see him giving fans too much access and I feel like with all the ways he inspires us with his limitless talent this is like his achilles heel- he needs to hold back more. But i could be sounding like a total here, because what he is going through now may have nothing to do with that. sorry for rambling! ! i'm really sorry!

Okay not to keep going sorry for bombarding you with comments but here is my other thing. I am not trying to blame GD for his own unhappiness here. Because no matter how much a celebrity or even just a person shares of themselves, if the response of those around them gets to be too much than they have a right to say stop when it gets to be too much. But I really do not think GD's relationship with fans is normal on either side of it. I do not know that much about kpop I am mainly a GD, YB , BB fan. I know other fans get jealous of idols dating , but aren't there some idols that openly date without there being death threats etc? With Gd people seem to take it so much harder when he is seen on what is probably a date, I don't get it, why? Then with GD sometimes you really can see his attachment o fans, usually it comes out when he is on stage where fans are appropriate and expected, but it seems really strong and real like the love he gets in those situations really means something to him. Then he writes 'mugler' for the fashion show only not on any album, and that is clearly being harsh towards fans. Of course it is possible that he really loves the fans that love his music, and scream at concerts but does not like the fans doing the threats on sns etc- so that could be the reason for him seeing two sided. But my other thing is when he was making the break up posts. I honestly think, even though a lot of people said stop reading into the quotes, there just quotes, he's not typing 'i broke up'. I honestly think the reason he wrote those is he does know he can count on fans to give him sympathy and lift him up, because why post them publicly? But what I don't think he was thinking of enough is fans were also going to blame kiko (because the quotes literally made it seem like the woman was breaking up with GD) for mistreating him and send more hate her way.

I felt horrible when I saw that GD had posted that too. The first thing that I wanted to know was, "What happened?" but that's just it, he is saying he wants us to leave him alone , so that means showing some self restraint on my part and not trying to search a bunch of sites or read between the lines to figure out what it was that finally pushed him to write a post like that. I just need to respect that GD does not want fans getting so invasive, and that means just focusing on what he does as an artist and not his personal life. I guess what worries me is there has always been hate on SNS and he seems to just tune it out, so it is hard not to become anxious and want to know if something even worse happened this time. But like I said I need to stop thinking about 'how can I find out these details?' and start thinking about what he actually asked us to do which is leave him alone.

I kind of hope he goes on hiatus too, because he needs it. We have been spoiled as GD fans by all the CFs, performances, videos, his activity on social media. I have never been a fan of someone who generates so many pictures, videos, tweets etc to keep us happy and in the loop as fans, it has been great but we need to just learn to live with GD acting like a normal celebrity- a month or maybe longer without news.

I truly am taking what he wrote at face value and feeling really bad that he is feeling bad but it just makes me think on two questions that I have had ongoing anyway. One is, when we are interacting as fans how far is too far for us making comments? I don't trash anyone. But i wonder if I am fueling the fire by just commenting on his personal life, and joining hundreds of people , and snowballing a little bit of gossip into a big story but it's hard not to, he's so interesting.