Emptiness

Have you ever felt empty?

I've noticed that I do from time to time. There are those moments, for me, when I just stop with whatever I'm doing and think what the hell am I doing? Why am I waisting my time, my life doing absolutely nothing important? Where am I going? What are my goals? Why can't I seem to move forward? Why does it seem as if I'm not growing up?

Because it feels as though I'm just stuck here, in a grey zone between becoming an adult, knowing and loving myself, and still being a child, on the path to getting to know myself.

Grey is a beautiful color. But not in this part of my life. Because if I were to answer all those questions, it would look like this:

- Nonsense

- I don't know

- I have no idea, backwards?

- I don't seem to have any

- I have nowhere to go

- Growing up is a vague term

Not the best nor the most desired answers any person realizes. But that's my life and this is where I seem to stand - nowhere. Great, just absolutely great. I applaude myself and continue to wish I knew the answer to at least one of those questions that circulate my unconscious and mind.

Comments

You must be logged in to comment

Saranghaesnsd9 #1 Jun 7, 2014 23:14:03

I guess we are alike in that sense. You felt this recently haven't you? I kind of sensed it but I didn't want to assume anything. You know that you have me to lean on when you feel like this, right? I may not be the funniest, kindest, or most caring person out there but I will always have open ears. When you feel empty, see the good side to it. Emptiness is to be pure, to be free of trouble. A empty box is more useful than a full one. Being empty enables people to care for you to fill in even just a small part of you. I'm stupid and sarcastic, but you still wish me well when I'm feeling down. For that, I owe you :) Perhaps you feel like you stand in the middle of nowhere with no purpose, but on my road, you are standing beside me or behind pushing me forward, ready to take care of me and brighten up my mood. Whether you view this the same or not, I think for one, you have a purpose,a road that spreads longer than the eye can see. Gray is a color of unsureness or doubt. It is a shade that can be contrasted to any color possible. The longer you walk, the lighter the color gets. Grey is one of the colors that could be any color. You make the colors for others and therefore that is your very own. The feeling of emptiness is something I'm used to, something I'm familiar with. I learned that if you live life doing only what you need to do and never do what you want to do or enjoy doing, there is no purpose in to living it much further...but you still should. I think genuine happiness or enjoyment is important, maybe even the most important. Growing to become a person more accepting of one self is growth at its best. Even the mature is childish. As the greatest artists once sang, they are "born to be a lady", however," be ladies but we stay girls ". It doesn't sound right but you know what I mean XD Take care! And Hwaitaeng!!!

Accuse #2 Jun 7, 2014 19:35:56

I know how you feel. I'm currently struggling with trying to figure out what I need to do with my life, and I'm constantly feeling down. I don't find joy in what I used to like. Somedays, it feels like I'm just a human capsule with a soul and mind that is slowly wasting away. However, I try my best to overcome these feelings. I occupy myself more with a lot of work and such. Anyways, my point being is that just know that you're not alone in this. A lot of people are transitioning through this rough phase in their life at the moment. It'll be tough, but pain is only temporary. I bid you good luck and hope you discover the joy that life has to offer you.