I started watching LOST just this week and I am totally hooked. That's an understatement, actually. I'VE BEEN HAVING FREAKING DREAMS ABOUT IT LIKE ETHAN STANDING BESIDE MY DOOR READY TO KILL ME AND FREAKING SHANNON AND BOONE GETTING TOGETHER. This is so unhealthy and unproductive. BUT I CANNOT STOP. I started getting feels about the show (I WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO DAMNIT) and now I started sleeping at 1 in the morning to finish constantly muttering JUST ONE MORE EPISODE. There's gonna be spoilers after this by the way so if you wanna watch it I recommed you don't read further. SO OKAY I STARTED WRITING THIS BECAUSE OF BOONE. FREAKING BOONE. UGH. DAMNIT. HE WAS SUPPOSED TO APPEAR IN 33 EPISODES AND I'VE ONLY WATCHED 16 OR 17 SO FAR AND HE FREAKING DIED ALREADY. I FEEL SO BETRAYED WIKIPEDIA. I TRUSTED YOU. I'm just- I can't calm down because I was kinda hoping that Shannon and him would work out their relationship. I know they can't be together because they're step-siblings but at least get some kind of closure for their feelings. I'm just crying inside right now. You don't understand.

I'M LISTENING TO A LOST MIXTAPE AND I AM CRYING OMG. THIS IS SUICIDE.

Okay, I'm just gonna talk about the most recent episode I watched. I LOVED IT SO MUCH DESPITE THE FACT THAT BOONE FREAKING DIED. Everything about it is so well thought out. I really loved the reoccuring contradictions of things, like black and white in John's backgammon game and in this episode, the concept of birth and death. This episode made me feel things. You know, like time's always chasing after you and you have no choice but to run faster for it not to catch up and you're getting too damn tired already but you can't afford to slow down. You're missing out on the details because everything's a blur BECAUSE YOU'R GOING WAY TOO FAST. Lost is making me think about things even more. It's as if I haven't been thinking about death enough.

Idk, but I think about death way too much.

Anyways, I also liked the scene with Boone telling Jack to let him go. I CRIED SO MUCH. ESPECIALLY WHEN BOONE WAS LIKE YOU DON'T HAVE TO KEEP THE PROMISE I'M LETTING YOU OFF THE HOOK. LIKE WTF CREATORS OF LOST MUST YOU HURT ME THIS WAY.

I AM CRYING AGAIN.

DAMN I WROTE SO MUCH FRAGMENTED SENTENCES. THIS IS WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE WHEN YOU'RE BLEEDING INSIDE.

freaking foreshadowing I SHOULD'VE BEEN PREPARED BUT NO I WAS BUSY ADMIRING BOONE COVERED IN BLOOD.