The reason something is wrong with me(trigger warning?)

I'm going to try and explain this as best as I can, but know that this will not be the best describe of what's i'm thinking. So... Don't every single detail is 100% accurate.

 

I use to cut, ok?

And like...

You know if you cut it's for relief and/or an escape.

Well here is where i'm ed up...

I've been thinking about when I use to cut..

and I just...

I remembered the feelings I would have then...

I would force myself to think it was a relief.

I would force it.

I didn't actually feel like that though.

I was just cutting for some reason.

And you want to know what that reason that was stuffed in the back of my head was?

Because of the blood.

Blood is so utterly pretty to me.

It's almost insane.

No.

It is insane.

I've just recently(meaning after I use to cut) began realizing my love for blood.

So.

I have cut again.

I think..

It was twice.

It was a while ago.

Both of them were.

But I didn't even try to convince myself it was for relief because there is nothing ing wrong with me.

NOTHING IS WRONG.

I'M PERFECTLY FINE.

Emotionally.

I don't know about mentally.

I would watch the blood drip down my thighs.

It's not even alot.

I'm not that tolerable to pain.

But it ing  that there is not even alot of blood.

I need more.

I want to see more.

But if I go back to my wrists, everyone will know i'm doing it again.

I scared my parents and friends when they found out before.

I don't want it to happen again.

I just...

I really like blood.

I don't know if you guys remember my older blog where I showed you my blood lips.

That was my blood.

That was my blood.

I cut my thigh and put it on my lips.

The ing taste- holy .

It was so bitter and ing good.

Oh dear god.

Does anyone know where I should go for the doctor's because .

The way the blood burned my throat.

I was great.

I'm rambling now.

Sorry.

...

But yeah..

I'm insane and if you want to,

feel free to unfriend me for it.

And don't comment something stupid.

 

I'm done now.

Back to Top ↑

Comments

You must be logged in to comment
Ellasauras #1
I understand. When I cut (I do it on my thighs), I love to just watch the blood flow down my leg and pool up and clot (I go relatively deep).
I cut for an escape (and punishment) but also because i honestly love the feel. The anticipation that washes over you when you put the razor to your skin and the adrenaline when you apply just a bit of pressure. But it's the bite, the sting, the fasf slice that brings me back.


Ugh
Kimshinyeong11 #2
Yeah umm same i just find it so beautiful ... my dad wanted to call a therapist and i started crying begging him to not..
its not my in fault not yours either!!! Noone in understands though /sighs
Thekpopobsessor #3
It's okay gurl. I cut too... But it's not noticeable since I cut my palms instead of my wrist... Though I was going through stress... But I basically felt what you felt.,.
ShawolShadow22 #4
Ehh join the club. I usually take one or two more than the recommended amount for Advil because of the taste. I agree. Blood is disturbingly beautiful and I often find myself playing with it too much
MintyPetals #5
i was also about to make a really disgusting joke but that's too much
MintyPetals #6
i was going to make a really ual joke but then i hit myself and decided not to
BubblyHunHan #7
it's not like i never try. YOU'RE STILL MY FRIEND CHINGU♡
but i afraid of blood though;___;
my body numb when i saw too many blood yet i still cut,once.


don tell anyone*whisper*
animefan #8
Im fine with it people have there own thing. The only thing im thinking is ur a vampire.
KoreaNa #9
Were still fine with you! ;;; as much as possible, don't do that, cuz there are a looooot chances for you! Don't think about the negative stuff. Use the negative stuff to reflect on yourself. :") well, you're actually smart if you thoughf about going to the doctor, maybe it'll help. Do it as early as you can... Good luck to youuuuu!
kawaii-gizibe #10
Listen, these are your choices and I won't leave you because of them. Yes I agree blood is delicious but, I know, you know what cutting can do and especially if you used to do it. I don't want you to get hurt, physically, like blood loss. So maybe see someone, but see how long this one lasts okay? <3
meanieful #11
Gurl, i wont and never will unfriend you. Also, everyone has been like this before. If you ever want to talk though, I'm always available on kik.
IAMJUNESHOE #12
I used to my blood to. One time I even scratched myself so hard that I would bleed because I wanted to drink my blood. But I'm still fine with you. I don't really think that is a reason that someone should not be fine with you. Yeah, it's not the norm but there are worst people. And I know that for a fact.
bbygrlolita #13
I do too......
CinderHeart #14
Honestly, I'm still fine with you.
Trust me, there are crazier people in this world, especially with terms of blood.
If you ever want to ramble, I'll try my best to understand <3
This still doesn't change the fact that you're a precious friend to me at all <3 ^^
Back to Top ↑