Hi. Uhhh. I wrote this blog just to get things off my chest..

This is just an emotion so it's okay if you would leave and go on with whatever you're doing. Keke. :)

So yeah.. Vacation is here and it feels like heaven because I can finally have the house to myself.. A time for precious sleep and slack off a bit.. To get all those SLEEPLESS DAYS from workloads some FULL REST. Not to mention our finals really demanded ALOT that caused me 2 weeks of sleep and coffee. But of course the never-ending chores around the house - - Sweeping, Dishes, Laundry and others - - Is of course my job also.. Now that I'm always at home, I have no excuse at all.. 

It's quite a big deal because mom doesn't want to hire maids anymore because of the past ones that didn't quite did a good job.. So I balance school and home.. 

And of course I can't do SOME of the chores especially when it really takes awful time to finish it.. Then my mom goes like : " WHY AREN'T THE DISHES CLEAN?! " WHY IS THE LAWN DEAD DRY?! " WHY HAVEN'T YOU FOLDED THE LAUNDRY YET?! " - - - And goes on..

I know I can't blame mom because she's tired from work.. Same goes with my sister who works as a nurse and has late shifts and stuff.. But heck I can't do everything at once!

There's really a day when everything is full of ..

At school you fail a very important short exam - - - Then you go by yourself alone just because you're surrounded with homophobic freaks ( freshman blues -__- ) - - - Then travel 2 ing hours just to get home ( depends on traffic, the slow driver, and passengers to fill the freaking vehicle ) - - - Tries to do a load homework with your mom nagging behind you and telling you that you're not being responsible - - - Then sleeps with deaf ears and a broken heart..

But at some days, I feel like I've done enough time for homeworks and did my chores.. - - - But it's not enough for mom.. - - AT ALL. Even now in vacation, NOTHING CHANGED. Even if I do all the chores and the ones I don't get to do often, it would still feel like I'm not doing enough. I wanted to defend myself that I DO get the chores done WHENEVER I CAN but I can't because mom would be mad at me and throws OTHER chores I don't get to do often and compares it -_- And the discussion gets longer and more complicated.. The more I reason, the more mom nags me and tells MORE harsh things..

And thirdly, I'm the type of person that does a task ONE BY ONE.. When I'm at home, and doing homeworks on Sundays ( it's the only FREE day I have because I have Saturdays for crying out loud ) mom wants me to do something.. - - - Don't get me wrong, when she just asks me to get something, I run and get it for her so I could FINALLY FINISH MY WORK IN PEACE.. But no. She goes all the way and always says that I make homeworks as AN EXCUSE from chores and always tells me that I treat her like a maid~

I freaking dunno how to react to that.. Then to hear from your mom the most horrible things that you know that you always give your all to balance everything - - - I really dunno.. It always brings me to tears instead because I can't make my mom understand me..

At times like these? I'm thankful I loved KPOP..

I go to my room.. Lay on bed and get undercovers.. Listen to SNSD songs for awhile.. It's like their songs really comfort me.. Even the ballads has these comforting vibes that I need when nobody can give me.. I'm really glad that I became a SONE.. I dunno if other K-heads know what I feel about this and their fandom but it's really fulfilling. It's like SNSD is the only thing I have in that moments of sadness.. 

I LOVE YOU GIRLS' GENERATION.. THANKS FOR COMFORTING MY BLEEDING EARS AND HEAVY HEART.. SARANGHAE~

So yeah I feel like again this very moment..

Like I'm the most horrible offspring that any parent could have..

I know I'll be better in a day or two, but it's really, REALLY painful..

Keke. Sorry for being so dramatic. I ran out of papers to write my feelings out so I just wrote it here.. Hehe~

Thanks for reading it till here.. - - If anyone did.. Hehe..

Bye for now~