you know what i hate the most? when a person who is guilty does anything to put the guilt on someone else just so they don't feel responsible for their mistakes. is that fair? why the i need to feel like the lowest human being ever just because he cannot admit he did wrong??! how can i escape him if he is my own father?! yeah...my dad...who decided it'll be a brilliant idea to take out the trash, which of course is good, but also thought there its no need to close the door or inform the sleeping me that he did all that while my five year old sister was alone in the living room. so if you put one and one together you know that this is the best way not to find the five year old in the living room five minutes later. sure its my fault that i didn't answer my phone that was on silence after the same five years old messed with it last night and probably did it but is that a reason to call me every curse word he knows and even go as far as to use violence? and when i say where he was wrong to tell me to shut up or he'll come home so we can 'talk' a bit more? the five years old is fine. while she was waiting for my dad on the street she meet her friend and her mother and went with them to the kindergarten...which my dad didn't notice, being so absorbed in the art of taking out trash... you know what's funny? that in three days no one will remember this, and no sorrys will be said. I'll just be left of until everyone calms down and then he'll use it to make me feel like later. believe me i know...it had happened before...verbal abuse..I'm really used to it. it means nothing...well almost but physical? i don't want to live with that.. I'm not close with my dad...not really but it never went this far...it seems that since I'm the oldest child I'm no longer a child...even my siblings call me mom accidentally all the time.. anyway...all i can say...i 'love' you too dad...