To fill you in, I have two guys that I can say I'm close with. One guy who is my oppa, who is three years older than and a childhood friend from way back before I knew how to walk. We lost touch and we're recently clicking again. This happened right after I told him that I missed him as a friend and that I like him as something more. He was that boy who tied my shoes when I was too young to. He was the one to pick me up when I fell. All these happy memories together as kids. The knight in shining armor. I would say. We get along well now and it seems like he can trust me and I can trust him a lot more, like we never grew apart. MY SISTER AND MY MOM KEEP SAYING WE'LL GET MARRIED. Like shut up, it's awkward. They don't even know I like him and it makes me uncomfortable.

On the other hand, there's my childhood friend since kindergarten and he liked me since first grade. Mind you, I'm now a freshman in high school. Like that's been a long time. All these years I've rejected him because I wanted to stay just friends. 2014 happened. He's doing "New Year, New Me" crap. So now that he's trying to become a new person, he seems to be drifting away. We used to be always together and now it seems like he rather do something else. I understand he wants to get over me, but it doesn't mean you have to leave me hanging. He calls me his best friend, but it doesn't seem that way anymore. He's still around, but he doesn't talk to me anymore. It's all just small talk. No long talks about memories or anything special. More like, "How was your day?" "Fine." "That's cool." "Okay." Nothing in common.

I guess this is how it is growing up. He wants to be friends. I want to be friends. I guess this is how it's supposed to be. I guess I'm being selfish, but I could feel we're not going to stay friends for very long anymore. To lighten up the mood, I want Kinders and my crush doesn't wanna bring me. How nice right? We still have some catching up to do.