So, I wrote about that thing with N and G...

And, when I said it wasn't over, it really wasn't...

So, I ended on the note that N confessed to me, right?

It was safe to say that I kinda panicked and did what socially awkward girls (like myself do) - Runaway.

I avoided him at most times...

But it was hard since our whole year seemed to know about it...

Seriously gossip in our school is like wildfire

And considering we only have about 50 people in our whole year, everyone knows everyone's business

*sigh*

Anyway, I've never been the main attention of these kinds of things until all of a sudden it's 'Aw, Jo... you and G and N.'

Okay! I know... stop reminding me!

Pretty much everyone asked me why I won't just get with N...

'He's this and he's that and he likes you...'

Yes, but no, I don't like him... anymore.

The year ended with poor results and awkwards friendships between me and N...

G confessed over facebook that he was gay, (apparently I was one of the first ones to know) aside from N who knew way before me!

Okay so fast forward...

G's brother was having a birthday party at their house and he invited me...

(Guess what I did, guys - I got on the wrong bus and ended up 2 miles from G's house)  (/_-)

Anyway, I didn't realise that N was also at that party so my reaction was to avoid him and stick with G...

Surprisingly it wasn't as awkward as I thought... well, it had been a few months and we sort of returned to being friends...

So after a few, ahem, drinks...

I got a bit tipsy and a lot of was starting going down all around...

I ended up on the sofa talking to N, and for some reason we were talking about my father (IDK, don't ask) I think I was saying how if we ended up together he would be surprised by the culture difference or  something along that line because obviously he's British and I'm Filipino

Ah! I said something along the lines of 'I don't know if my dad would approve'

Anyway, N told me he wouldn't have minded, not after  our long phonecalls where I always seemed to be eating noodles and not much else (He likes Filipino food by the way, just putting it out there... so did G,  IDK, I just find it interesting)

Anyway,  I couldn't stay any later because the last bus was at 11 and my father was working that night so he couldn't pick me up.

And whilst we were waiting outside N came out, picked me up in this really tight hug. Then I knew...

He still liked me... I don't know how much, but I was not impressed... I thought we got past that

A few months later and it's a new and outl last school year - (for them at least, I stayed back a year to change my subjects... my biggest regret because I had to watch a lot of my friends graduate high school without me)

Anyway, our new Head Boy Ash (he's ridiculously clever that the school offered him a job when he rejected univerity, he's now a support teacher - weird)

Anyway, Ash is throwing a party and naturally we all went because we all love Ash...

And when I say all, yes, N was there...

A few hours later, after a few forced drinks my bestfriend M was talking to N - they had now set their differences aside and were friends again...

Anyway, N was talking to M about me...

And  then M came to talk to me

She told me N said that he 'loved' me... LOVE guys...

wtf?!

I'm flattered, naturally, but love?

And then she said something that got to me...

'Won't you just give him a kiss?'

Won't I just give him a kiss?

'Just a kiss... for me?' M pleaded, 'just see if there's any spark.'

And then N was there, sitting opposite me, talking to G

Here's a piece of advice about taking advice gus - Never... ever... take advice from a drunk friends whilst you, yourself is drunk

Because out of nowhere I was making out with my ex-crush and he was falling backward on the chairs and with myself on top of him -

and then I realised what I had done

I pulled back, sat on the floor for a while contemplating my sins

Got up

Shouted 'I hate you!' to my bestfriend and ran away...

(Apparently this was amusing to my friendds as it  was all everyone was talking  about on Monday...)

Anyway, I broke his heart for the 2nd time because whilst  thought N had asked my bestfriend to ask me to kiss him

It turned out it was my bestfriend's own idea and that resulted to N thinking this was me 'realizing' my feelings for him...

I broke his heart the 2nd time...

Apparently N started texting another girl

He even told me how he was starting to get over me and would appreciate it  if I would stop confusing him

Yes, I felt horrible... I didn't mean to kiss him

I didn't know he liked someone...

And I would like it if he could stop discussing me with his friends...

Obviously I didn't say this... We avoided each oother and he hated me... well, disliked me...

This happened just before Christmas and it had been around a year since I invited him to the Christmas party with G...

It seems a year hadn't changed him much...

Anyway, he's now with that girl who he's texting...

She's actually also my classmate for Geography and she's lovely, and clever and pretty... We get along, in fact I attended a party with her a few months ago

N's now in university and I haven't seen him since prom... we're back to being some sort of friends haha

G's also in university, I saw him a couple of weeks ago when we had a sleepover. Ash was also there... tsk tsk, the teacher fraternising with his students!

So, I'm sorry I bored you with this story...

I just miss my friends I suppose, they were the best part of my highschool years... I still have a few more month until I graduate...

Then it's off to Uni for me or wherever my grades take me...

And also, I just wanna say I'm not the type to attend parties much nor do I drink excessively :') just to make it clear ;)

If you read up to this part, I think you deserve an award...

If you type yor bias' name in the comment section, I will reply with a scenario or something ;)