Ugh. I need new friends.

Most of my friends are insensitive.

Just why in the hell should I care for you if you can't care for me.

They just think of themselves.

I have problems too, OKEY!!

I'm like so so close to leaving them behind.

I once did it.

I sure as hell can do it again.

I just feel like I truly have no best friends in the world.

I have friends.

Yeah.

But I don't have someone who completely understands me.

I do have people who kinda are my best friends.

But do I trust them to save me if I'm going to die?

No.

Do I trust them to come to me when things get bad?

Hmmm.......No.

I just don't.

The only person I felt like myself with moved away.

But lately everyone is pissing me off.

I'm great at hiding my emotions.

So, they could never suspect me.

I'm a wolf in disguise.

And no one has ever seen my true intentions.

I have a reason for doing everything.

I'm very sly actually.

I could care less about almost anything.

But, I truly am a nice person.

As hard as that is to believe.

But no one knows the true me.

Even my mother doesn't know.

; }

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NatsukiLovesSeungie #1 Nov 9, 2013 19:29:39

You know, I used to think like that too, that I had no true friends and that there wasn't anytone I could actually call my best friend or someone who would care about me like I would for them.
I too thought that I could hide my emotions pretty well and that they didn't notice when I was sad, angry or upset and let it go like that; solving my problems by myself. But one day someone who now I know I can call my friend told me "you keep so much to yourself that sometimes I think you don't considere me your friend". That let me thinking that, even if I did call her my friend I never actually trusted her as to tell her when things weren't going well, when I had problems and that was because I thought she didn't really care for me. That day I observed everyone around me, not actually trying to find someone who cared for me, but trying to see the people around me.
I was a going through depression at that time, and not only she, more people had noticed it. Then, just then I trully saw how much people who reall cared for me where there.
Of course I also found a lot of people who I thought were my friends, but at that time they didn't notice my state or didn't care that much for it and some who didn't care a little bit. Anyway, I was happy I found all that people who really really I could call my friends.

You might be right, and there might be many people around you who don't care about you. But if you see, if you really see the people around you, I'm sure you'll find the friends you're looking for.

Anyway, even if you don't now, maybe you will in the future. Sometimes you just have to make a random conection with a stranger and KABUM, there's your best friend.

And, I know I write/talk a lot, but people won't know you if don't let them know you.