English - 1st Term - updated on 08062013 || Kim Dias; 9-Diligence

 

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A lot of people often ask me the question, "What is something that can be stored in your mind as a beautiful, yet meaningful memory?" Another question to add to that initial question, "It does not even need to be beautiful; what is something that can be kept in your mind forever, and that you will never be able to forget about?" The cause of special events are by actions; after all, actions obviously affect the future, and it all depends on whether that action is for the better or the worse. Something that I use to remember the major memories in my life are little objects that stayed with me during said those time periods, which is why I have loads of random objects scattered around my room. Even if it is an empty water bottle or a candy wrapper, I'd still keep it.

 

Year 2010 - The year I met my best friend.

 

I can not remember it as clearly as I'd like to since I've got an awful memory, but I'll try to do so. It was the year 2008 when I had my first encounter with Denise Fernandez; we were both in the third grade. All I can remember is that we both despised each other, the reason being assumed to be because of our attitudes; we didn't favor each other's attitude.

 

In the fifth grade, year 2010, she and I had become classmates. My attitude toward her had neutralized, so no fights were started. Since Denise was new to the star section (but not new to the people in that section), she felt rather lonely. I, at the time, stayed with Gail and Angela. I guess one day she just came up to us and asked if she could stay with us. We said yes, and throughout the next few months, she and I had gradually gotten close to each other. Soon enough, we had developed our friendship from acquaintances to friends to the best of friends. Even as I look back at this story, I'm awfully surprised. She and I have nothing in common; I like K-Pop and Japanese rock while she liked other types of music. She liked gaming; I was more of a person who would role play. Even when it came to food, it was different since she liked cheese and I didn't; she didn't like sweets and I did.

 

There is no symbolic object for this memory as I have not developed the habit of keeping an object to remember memories yet.

  

October 2011 - The time my hair was cut short.

 

I never mentioned that I used to have long hair, now have I? Well, I used to have. It used to touch my lower back, and I used to maintain it a lot more compared to other girls. The way I cut off my hair was a little too much; around twelve inches of my hair (if you were going to measure it from my jawline up until the very end) was cut up to my actual jawline, and it somehow resembled a male's hair. When I had long hair, I was so quiet and shy, and I absolutely loathed talking, but when I cut it short, I guess I became more confident and active. My personality changed a lot, but even then, bits of my old character still remained inside of me. I think this has something to do with the psychology of a person; once you change a lot about your physical appearance, you'll feel like a new person and you have that need to make a new name for yourself, and I did just that.

 

The story's pretty simple; we went to my mom's friend's salon right after school and had my hair cut. That's it.

 

The symbolic object for this memory are the locks of hair were cut which are kept safely in a zip lock bag.

  

01 November 2011 - My nephew was born.

  

This experience is probably the most life-changing one yet. I mean it taught me loads of lessons like responsibility for myself and my family, and that studies should be placed over love for now. At the same time; however, it made my life harder. My nephew, given the name of Ethan James, was born on the first of November, year 2011.

 

We went to the hospital early, and my sister, Nicole, was timing her contractions. I had taken my laptop with me because I was highly aware that we wouldn't be staying in the hospital for just a single day. I think I was awfully worried because my sister was only twenty and I felt that twenty was too young for someone to deliver. 

 

For the majority of the time, I stayed outside of the delivery room since the internet inside the room that we slept in wouldn't work. We stayed in the hospital for four days, then left immediately after that.

 

It changed me in a way that I had to take care of this child as well since we lived together under the same roof. We all took our part in taking care of the child, but I felt I did a lot. My sister was busy with college and doing the cooking. My parents had a little bit of money problems. They were constructing a house at the time, and Nicole had failed four different colleges due to skipping classes, so this was her second year at SFU-- and now, with this baby, so much more money was being thrown out; they didn't have a proper budget settled for me. I wore hand-me-downs, and I had to pretend that I wanted to dress like a male just so my parents wouldn't feel bad for me or pity me.

 

There is no symbolic object for this memory as I am pretty sure that I will remember this memory forever.

  

1 April 2013 - I got contact lenses.

  

This fourth experience is just similar to cutting my hair. I got my contact lenses right before recognition-- funny, don't you think? I guess I was desperate for them because I felt like such an ugly person; loads of people told me that I was ugly, even my own sister. I stayed from nine to nine thirty just trying to put them on and take them off. It was awfully painful to have to put on contact lenses since it was my first time to do so. My eyes were being stubborn at the time-- they just didn't want to open up properly.

 

It changed me a little too-- I saw that I looked better compared to when I wore glasses. Despite feeling better-looking, I became a little bit of an introvert. I guess I'm just not confident either way.

 

The symbolic object for this memory is my first bottle of lens solution for the contact lenses. It's empty now, but I've still got it. 

  

17 July 2013 - I found out my sister was pregnant again.

 

The fifth and final experience that I had was when my dad told me that my sister was pregnant again. During that time, I was in the car with some relative and my dad. My dad offered me food-- two pieces of curry bread-- to calm me down. "Are you finished eating?" my dad had asked. "Is there nothing in your mouth? Swallow the rest of the bread and calm down." I was getting awfully suspicious about what he was going to tell me, and I had automatically assumed that I was in trouble.

 

"Your sister is four months pregnant." He had said.

 

Simple words put into one sentence could complicate things up, and this sentence was most certainly not an exception. It could change one's life; it changed my life.

 

The attention my parents give me is awfully small. My parent's attention is directed toward their jobs; my sister, Ethan, and their stress regarding everything (including money). It was too difficult for me to fit in there, and now that they have a new nephew or niece coming up, I most certainly can not fit in there anymore. 

 

It hurt a lot because I was also ignored by a lot of people at school, and it was difficult for me to fit in, and I cried for a few days because of that.

 

There is no symbolic object for this memory because I do not intend to remember it.

 

These memories taught me a few things, but some I have to question, "Why did this happen to me? Of all people, why me?" But I'll never find out the reason. Meeting Denise taught me that I was, in fact, capable of liking someone as a friend despite the fact that we were opposites and that we hated each other the first time we met. Cutting my hair and getting contacts taught me that I was capable of changing my attitude, even if I say I can't. But those two other experiences-- my nephew being born and finding out that my sister was pregnant made me wonder... "Why me?"