rant about my skin...

i just really want to make this quick, so excuse any mistakes in grammar.

this has been on my mind for the longest time and i feel i need to vent it out since my parents disagree with me and blah blah blah. okay well. i get really offended when im called dark. im like, really tan and most of my friends are pale. they always compare skin tones and i always end up doing it, even though i know i'm the darkest. they always tease me and say "hahah you're the darkest." or say things like "oh, you're too dark." like, i get really hurt by it. 

i'm already using a skin brightening product which is working in both lightening my skin and in treating my pimples. but i guess it's not enough? what do i need to do? bleach my skin? i hate how i feel like i need to have light skin to have confidence in myself. i simply hate it. but it's kind of hard to except myself when all of my bias want a girl with pale skin and a lot of my friends are in love with pale skin and i don't have pale skin. 

when i informed my dad about it, he was all like: why can't you just like yourself as is? 

and i'm like, it's kind of hard to do when your friends are all like "pale skin is pretty" "you're too dark" "blah blah blah". i'm not ashamed in having tanned skin. i  actually like it on a lot of people. but... i don't know... it's like, i like tanned skin but since my friends all have pale skin and find pale skin pretty, i'm starting to like pale skin better... ughhh. 

but anyway. i feel like kai... even though im sure kai isn't that dark. he gets offended when people call him dark... like really offended... and i feel bad because he's in a society where pale skin is pretty and ideal... and it seems like the people i'm around in school are like that society... 

btw, i'm filipino. and when youre filipino, you can be any different skin tone from pale pale pale to dark as hell. but i guess that's with any race, right? one of my friends had gotten tan over the summer and asked me "did i really get that tan? is it that bad?" and i replied with "you're not even that tan, but i have to admit that you did get a tan. i think it's fine. but if you like it, then it's okay." she then replied "i don't like dark skin, i like pale skin." i was so bothered by that, that i just walked away. 

i get that everyone has their own opinions and that you can voice them anytime, but when they say that... i wonder if they think i'm pretty. like, when they say im pretty, do they actually mean it? because... i'm not pale, nor to i have pretty features... so do they actually mean it? 

I DUNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~ -yoseob. 

/sighs deeply/ well... that's all i needed to say... thank you for letting me vent. please comment on your opinion, experiences, etc... hopefully it can make me feel better. and hopefully, if you have the same problem, then this helped in some way? thank you... so very much... /ugly whale sobs/ 

 

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toffies #1
Okay i know it's been a while since you wrote this and we don't know each other whatsoever but I want to write to you either way.

Well, I'm Swedish and I'm super pale..like my-body-has-never-seen-sunlight-kind of pale. Even though people in Sweden are considered really pale, it's not something that is appreciated. Many people get offended if someone says they are pale, the complete opposite of Asia. Summer in Sweden is like a competition of who can get the most tan (and get skin cancer at the earliest age).

I ,however, am not interested in spending all my free time sweating on the beach to change my skin color so I have always stayed pale. That has given me many weird looks throughout my life and I'm always being encouraged to "go out and get some color" when summer comes. I have also been asked if I'm albino a couple times.
I understand how you feel, even though our situations are reversed. I live in Korea right now and people are always telling me how pale I am (in a positive way) and it's so weird to adjust to. I'm not even pale in a pretty way, i have the see-through kind of skin so you can often see my veins and other things. Most of the time my legs are a blueish kind of pale, not very pretty at all.

Being pale is not always appreciated, it's not always pretty and pale people, like myself, also feel insecure about our skin color. I couldn't care less what color someone's skin is, they are pretty no matter what. I hope you feel better about your skin, and even though this turned into a long rant, that you feel somewhat comforted knowing that someone feels the same. Take care!
eunyhuk-love #2
Hm I hate it when people can be so shallow to only think of colour. I'm sure you're not dark like jongin isn't. Like he is ing pale but because the rest of the members are like ghosts he seems darker when he isn't! It really annoys me when people think pale automatically means beautiful because like I'm at the other end of the stick and I'm black (annoyingly my mum is a beautiful whiteish shade) so think of how it would feel for someone in a similar position to me who people they idolise only say 'yeah I like small petite light girls with dark straight hair' /well you kinda do know how I feel :P/ but it annoys me that their perception on beauty is so narrow.
you don't need to bleach your skin girl be beautiful and it'll be nicer to find someone who appreciates you and not shallow idols who want white sticks
IheartN3rds #3
YOU SHOULD TEXT ME.
KaiCakes #4
awww i'm so sorry you have to deal with that. i suggest you at least find someone who's not considered pale and become good friends with them. i know that can be hard but next time you're in school or a party or something just sit next to someone who you consider 'dark' and start up a conversation. i don't have many friends because of all the different things i do that my friends think are weird. So I'd try to find people who have the same interests as me and get to know them.
kyuminhunhan1213 #5
it's better to be yourself. sometimes, being the blabla-est is the good, i mean whenever i'm down because of my friends' cruel opinions toward me (mostly bcs i love kpop) i always think that bcs i'm the only one here who have known kpop for very long and stuffs, i feel one of a kind and great. i have good grades above 85% of my class so i didnt get that embarassing opinions again. i'm tan too and feel nothing. just being the smarter/even smartest, you'll be respected. it's from my experience and point of view, hope you didn't feel bothered :)
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