I hate life

I'm so upset right now this assignment my English teacher gave us is about the 5 stages of grief and I had to think about the things I want to forget I'm starting to blame myself again and I hate it so ing much it hurts so ing much to think that my dad won't come back and this assignment reminded me that he won't come home anymore and he won't hug me anymore I won't be able to smell his scent anymore or feel his beard and mustache on my face or hear his laugh or his jokes or any of that and if ing hurts so much it's really hard to go through it alone because my sister doesn't talk about it and I keep it in all the time and pretend I'm not bothered by it or that I'm fine and happy when I'm not I just ing not happy like I use to be this death has changed me so much and I hate this assignment for making me remember how it feels to think these things and I just don't want to have to deal with any of this anymore I know it's been four years but I'm still not over it or at least a little accepting at all I'm sorry for my rant but I have to let is out somehow or I'll explode

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YEOLLIEZEL #1 Jun 20, 2013 09:58:32

THINK POSITIVE. don't be a pessimist. Don't make the negative things bothered you.. it will just make you more sad. be happy always! :)

deliberatemistake #2 Jun 18, 2013 10:42:30

Vivi, I'm here for you.

PepeMon #3 Jun 17, 2013 17:53:11

Yo ,Stop, Don't be upset man, Its sad and heartbreaking that happenning and really quite disrespectful they're making you do that, but you have to remember no matter how much you try to forget things, it'll always be brought up somehow, and I have NO Idea what you're going through but I have got so much life-tragedys and I swear I could just...-but you have to be strong and have to realize life Isn't always going to easy and give you what you want, sometimes you have to fight for it, I really don't know what to do that can help you my dear, but as I WILL do my honest best to make you feel better, I have trust in you that you're strong and you can do this, I'm not sure but one day people will look up to you for being to strong, really show people your strong and be strong, cause that's a real role-model and one day someone will look up to you, keep smiling lovely, and one day you'll be able to smile and not cry when talking about the things you once couldn't, this is one thing we were created for, to test how strong you are, and If you're a strong person, you will get through life!, So honey, keep smiling and stay happy, because It's not that hard remember you can control yourself, which means you can control your emotions, which means you can CHOOSE wether this will effect you or not, so like I said Stay positive and keep moving forward my dear, Climb over these walls!, you can do it ^^

PS: Sorry for Grammar, Spelling Mistakes.

Love ya <3
Stay strong for me sugar <33
-Мооη

clouded-freelancer #4 Jun 17, 2013 17:12:08

Shhh, don't curse so much. It makes it worse.
Take some breaths, go to a park. Think.
Mikado never had a dad, he left. And since then, he's had a step dad who always works, almost never sees him. And his mother is always working hard for them too.
Assignment is just an assignment. (I always lie on mine, when ever it says both parents need to sign, cause i only really have one. And all our last names are different. _Mikado)
Setting aside the differences, and what you don't have, let out what you feel, talk to someone? You are welcome to comment or ask whatever to us, we'll be here. (MIkado will)
_Mikado & Swobchi

Milky_Sky #5 Jun 17, 2013 17:05:18

Past is our part of life too. And hey, just think that its can makes you more strongest... Ummm, maybe you will crying over when you was writing ur assignment, just split it. I am not good to comfort someone ... But you can do that, right?? Be strong, honey ^____^

AjBa13 #6 Jun 17, 2013 16:15:50

It's okay to feel that way :) about this assignment, even tough it has brought back all the feelings you want to bury deep inside so no one knows of them try and take it as an opportunity for letting your family know how you really feel. Maybe your sister is waiting for a chance to let it all out just like you. you will never know if you keep on waiting, go for it and take the the chance (if you have tried to before and still nothing has happenned then sorry for saying this as if i knew what is going on) you have every right to feel the way you do, take this as your strenght and show your dad there is no day you don't remember him and even tough it hurts that let's you know he's still with you, keep him as your reason to be your best always. (if i said anything innapropiate sorry in advance hehe i haven't lost anyone in my life so maybe i'm mot getting you but i still will be here reading you hehe)

Evil_Pandabear #7 Jun 17, 2013 12:35:55

Wow... I find that assignment to be very... intruding? Inappropriate? To force someone to have to relive a heartbreaking moment in their life is wrong... I understand your pain of losing a family member close to you, but I hope you know that it does get better and the pain will lessen. I hope you cam get through this hard time right now and I hope I helped ^^

sweet_devil_Cristy94 #8 Jun 17, 2013 12:03:19

Well that's really sad :( but what can you do? These are things you have to do. You will never get over your dad's death but after some time the pain lessens. Besides your father isn't dead as long as you remeber him :) The memories keep him alive :) (hope I don't say something stupid) My life isn't any better than yours (even through I didn't lose someone close to me) There will be a lot more things you won't like in the future. You need to keep going^^