E oIt's been 2 years since I became a Hottest. I remembered correctlty, on 16th August 2011, I decided to download Hands Up MV after listening to the song several times and also decided to become a fan of 2PM (which later on I found out that it's called Hottest). 

I like 2PM very much since early in the beginning (well now I freakin love them so much LOL). Since I became a Hottest, many things happened, things that made me changed, into either a better one or worse one, I’ll let you, those who read this, to decide at the end of this post.

Before knowing 2PM, I was a very shy person. I was very shy, literally, especially when it came to interacting, communicating, and making friends. Whenever I had conversations with other people, I never liked to stare rite into their eyes. Because I felt scared, maybe, scared of the judging looks because I had always thought that I’m no good and everyone else was better than me. I was never good at making friends in both real life and social networking site. In twitter, for example, I barely made friends, and only chatted with my school friends. But after I became a Hottest, I felt I’m more sociable. Commenting on every 2PM pic shared by fanbases, following and chatting more and more with Hottests from many different cities, countries... I became more open (and talkative LOL). With that being said, I became talkative both in real life and in twitter. In real life, I talked more with my friends, even making new friends.

Beside that, I also think that after becoming a Hottest, I think I’d become more mature. Since I talked to many Hottests, especially the ones older than me,  so it might affect the way I saw things, think about things, about 2PM, KPOP industry, everything. Since 160811, I’ve come to be a more cheerful person. Although there were so many homeworks, tests, or problems at school, I will always smile everytime I was in twitter, updating and fangirling over 2PM and talking to Hottests. And I like the changes I made, so far.

But, there were also some negative changes, sadly. After knowing 2PM, I turned to be too addicted to internet, too freaking much addicted. On school days, I wake up at 5, taking a bath, dressing and everything until 5.30 then after that I directly sign in my twitter and browse the internet to see what updates or things about 2PM that I miss during the night. Then, 7 hours at school, back at home, lunch, and internet AGAIN. It’s always like that. Even sometimes I will rush all my study so I could use the internet asap, means my grades at school did have some decreasement. One more, on holidays, I could even be on twitter / internet for 9 HOURS without break. Absurd? Yes.

Let’s see... I’ve ruined my eye sight because of using laptop and handphone too much, and my hearing sense too, because I’d like to listen to songs or watch variety shows with loud volume. Even, now I’m having an arguement with my mom, which is strange because we had never had one before. She confronted me of changing drastically. No longer care for my family and only care for 2PM instead. She said I no longer have social life too, because I’m on my laptop or handphone all the time. I know, I’ve realized she is right. I’ve changed too much, making everyone changes too. Now it seems like everyone, including my family, is turning backs on me. My family are always like finding every action I do to be wrong, while my friends? They don’t care about me at all. Well, they are kind to me, AT SCHOOL, but when school is over, they’re like “Who are you? I don’t care about you. You are only my friend at school.” These made me stressed and depressed every day. To go home, back with the people you consider as a family but they’re the ones you get the feeling of unwanted. To go to school, where I meet a bunch of fakers who call themselves as my friends. Ah, I’m so helpless...

So, I think those how I changed, my life as Hottest. Is it better? Or worse? I dunno. What I know is that, never in my life I will regret my desicion to join this fandom. No. I’m proud that I choose the right group to love, the right fandom to join, and the right people to be friend with, HOTTEST.