I just read my last blogpost here, you forget a lot of things you write down sometimes, haha. I feel like I've made progress since back then. I know it's only been a few months, and I'm far from being better, but I've definitely progressed. 

  I I made the realization today that I've been living in a fog the past four years. Ever since we moved from Maine things are always hazy; I can remember so many things from back in Maine. The scents, the scenes, the emotions attached to certain memories, faces, places, all of it. But anything after that seems like a bunny ear antenna on a tv. Some things I can't even discern fake from reality, like they're the memories of someone else. I guess that means I've changed a lot. 

  I've also come to terms with the fact that things will never go back to the way they were. I was able to be carefree back then, I had friends, I was even able to have a normal crush on a guy and keep my sanity. Now I usually only allow myself to crush on celebrities (mainly kpop stars, as you can tell) because at least you know they don't like you back already, and there's no baggage to carry, you just move on. 

  I have a long way to go, but I'm getting there. Just gotta work hard and keep pushing forward. 

[Work Hard Play Hard]