The cold blade made contact with my skin. The feeling of fright as well as excitement ran over me. My mind was blank, thinking about nothing but that. Did I dare do this again? Do I really want to see the faces of fright before me? I don’t know what I want. My heart raced as I debated whether or not to go on with the process.  If I began this again everything is bound to repeat itself; the yelling, the crying, the problems, the therapists. Should I really repeat this again? Why do I do it in the first place? I don’t know why I do anything these days.

I glanced down at the shiny blade, the light shining though my window reflecting on it. Why is life so unfair, I know there are children with worse lives than me but can you really consider that when you yourself feels trapped? I can’t even go to the simplest people such as my parents. They are part of the reason why I do what I do. School, work, money, bills, whatever has to do with me is too much for me to handle. Try having your parents compare you to other people, complaining why you aren’t perfect, why you can’t be like them.

Imagine being harassed at work and school. It’s not pleasant I tell you that. Life is just stressful. Why can’t I just disappear into thin air? I’m pretty sure no one will miss me. My mind raced with all of the things wrong in my life. As this happened, I unconsciously added pressure to the blade. The last time I did this I fainted from so much blood loss and I ended up hurting him again. I wish he would go away; I know he's only trying to help me but I just can't let anyone into my messed up world I call life. Why do I hurt people?

I lingered on the question as I glanced down at my wrist. I removed the blade and ran my fingers over the old scars that appeared. My eyes became clouded with warm tears. What am I doing? I asked myself. My hands began to shake and before I knew it, I had dropped the blade. My whole body was shaking by that time, I began to sob. Why must I keep hurting myself? For things I have not done. I can't stand life. Suddenly a person popped into my head. Him. Perhaps, just maybe he may be the only reason for my living.

He was the one who helped me stop for the pass 6 ½ months. I can't throw all that away...Someone help me, please. Please make it stop. I fell over and soon drifted off to sleep dreaming of nothing but darkness. For the first time that day my mind was at peace, no commotion or disturbance what so ever.

...Thank you, for helping me...

A/N:  So how was it? This is not personally for me but a friend of mine. She is an amazing person and she's always on top of things but when I found out she was self-harming it was so shocking. It seemed as if everytihng was perfectly fine with her. You would never suspect this from her. I felt so pathetic that I couldn't help her out with it but I'm so thankful for a close friend of mine that helps her when she needs it. I can't imagine what she goes through but it always gets better, I can tell you that.  But you can't judge a book by it's cover. :) I hope that she keeps up her strike against self-harm. She's doing a great job~ 

P.S. : SELF-HARM IS NEVER, EVER THE ANSWER! If you need help ask someone!