Writing has always been my passion. I began when I was in the second grade. I use to make fanfics of that comic book Archie, I honestly don't know why but I use to write and write and I didn't care if people saw.

When I was in the third grade I started making fanfics of my favorite rock bands. Normal crap and sometimes I had the tendency to write personal stories or ones of pure fiction with my own ideas but I got inspiration from my songs.

As it moved up I began writing fanfics of my Kpop idols. I became shy more and more and I was never comfortable writing when someone was next to me. Since our home burned down my room was my sanctuary. I wrote there and discovered all my ideas there (okay so I may not have discovered all, I mostly get inspired in the shower. Don't ask.)

So since its been a year (possibly two) since my last update I sort of lost my mojo. And this made me cry. I loved writing. THIS WAS MY MEDIUM. This kept me calm.

I wrote when I was...

sad

happy

depressed

angry

crazy

and suicidal

my stories are creations of things that have happened or are still happening in my life. My stories are my journals, my diaries, my biography. If you read in between the lines these stories of mine reveal my life from birth till now and it pushes forward everyday.

I feel so sad that I'm losing my creative touch. I know, this is such a small deal to cry over when there are people dying of hunger, losing all their money and more serious events. But everyone has something to deal with which is why this is something major to me. It may not be a big deal to others but writing is my passion. I've set my mind to create a book of my own, I've already begun on it but as you can see my laptop burned and I have not opened my hard drive so I can't retrieve it. I'm hoping and praying my hard drive would work. That book I started on, I put all my passion into it. I edited it day and night, I always checked on spellings and grammars and I made sure that everything was perfect.

Which is why I need my mojo back and I was hoping watching Protect the Boss or any Kdrama would spring up. I've tried listening to Kpop songs but nothing.

So I can't force myself. I am never satisfied with my creations when I know I FORCED myself.

So I know this is cliche but I'm sorry for nothing updating early. I do promise that I will not abandon these fics. I have thought of abandoning them but what came in my mind was two things.

1. My dear readers who are possibly still out there waiting (but I know I've lost you all, even though you have not unsubscribed to me yet)

2. I can't do it.

I can't do it because these stories are so important to me. Like I said, this story is my life line from birth to now.

Which is why I'm glad no one is plagiarizing my stories anymore. And if you do see anybody plagiarizing them please please PLEASE do report it immediately, these stories are not just hobbies or for fun. This is my life line. If I physically wrote a story on a paper and I was in that burning house again I would save it. I just didn't have the energy to save my laptop at the time.

I hope to get my mojo back but I will continue to write stories everyday even if they are bit by bit. Just as long as I can be able to accomplish my updates. The lock screen on my iPhone is a photo of my list (thanks again Lisa!) so I can always remind myself to begin my writings.