me and my boyfriend broke up today.
after 7 months (plus 6 more from a previous relationship) we finally broke up. i dont even know what to feel at the moment.
i guess it's for the better. he's moving away at the end of the school year, anyway. and i've been expecting it for a while.
and even though i was thinking about breaking up just the other day, and i was wanting it and i was expecting it, i still bawled my eyes out.
i mean, i wasn't happy, he obviously wasn't happy. our conversations were getting boring and superficial. we were both avoiding each other. it was obvious it was going to happen soon. i guess i just didn't want to let go even though i know i had too.
he was like, my second serious boyfriend, and i'm gonna miss him, ya know?
it kind of breaks my heart to know i won't be able to stay up all night skyping him, or stay on the phone with him all day, or hold hands or hug him anymore.
i kind of miss him already, but i know it's better this way.
i just hope it won't be awkward between us, because he was a really good friend of mine before we dated.

aside from that, school terribly.
i got assigned so much homework.
and i've been a terrible procrastinator, so i'll probably end up putting it off until sunday night.
i got hit with a paper ball today. twice. in two different classes.
this always seems to happen.
"pick on the little asian girl"
my school .
and then i failed my biology quiz.
because i mixed up stupid translation and transcription.
and to make matters worse, i started crying when i realized my mistake.
it was so embarrassing. i was just sitting there crying and everyone was just looking at me and it made things worse and-
yeah. i'm too sensitive. i know.
and i have a frick ton of essays/projects due in my ap human geography class.
and i hate geography and i just ugh.
stupid ib diploma.
 

to anyone who's read this far:
thanks for reading, i guess.
kudos if you've read all of it.
my problems are probably really petty to most of you, but that's okay. judge me all you want.
i get enough of it at home + at school to be used to it by now.
i just needed to let everything out. and i feel a lot better tbh.
well. bye i guess.