I can't do this anymore

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I'm tired of this....

all of this....

I just don't see the point in anything anymore.

Meds don't work

yoga doesn't work

and I have even gone to 3 different places of worship to try and find the spark that is missing in me

nothing

I want to quit

I want to give up

I'm tired of fighting myself

I play the part of happy daughter, sister, best friend

but on the inside I'm drowning

I don't want to pretend anymore

I know none of you care and I doubt more that 3 people will even read this

but I just need someone to know

I just need some place to write out my pain

my exhaustion

my loosing battle

I'm hanging on with the tips of my fingers and I'm still slipping

I want to reach out and take someones hand

but I don't feel like anyone or anything is out there for me to grab

I feel nothing but sadness

I want to feel more

I want to be happy

I want that plastered smile on my face to be real

Some days are worse than others

tomorrow might be better

it might be worse

I don't know my future

but it looks very dark

 

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Comments

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agneshaha #1
Aww I knw hw u feel i was having depression a few days ago but a cheered up. Shove away all de negative thots:). Sorry if this doesnt help
hojuwonchan #2
Seeing you post this makes me sad. I don't know what you've went through or is going through right now, but I hope you'll stay strong and keep praying. God is always there for you and sometimes, you should leave things up to Him. I hope you stay strong and find happiness in K-Pop somehow. And well, other things. When all things seem like the end, remember, there's someone out there who's pushing a door that says pull and walks into the door.
Hope you'd feel better soon kay? Hwaiting! ♥
pinkaichu #3
Hey, how about getting some nice music? Find a song you love, go for a long walk in a part/forest/ect or just lock yourself in your room. Play the music and dance. Let it all out. It's an amazing feeling when you don't care about anyone seeing you. About anyone thinking something about you. You just lose yourself in the rhythm.
I always do that when life starts suffocating me.
Taemint17 #4
This made me really sad :(
Unni~ I can't say that I understand exactly how you feel because I'm not going through the same situation, but I understan the gist of it. Lately I've been feeling kind of like that... and it's not a very good feeling and I don't know how to get rid of it, so I understand that... I'm not sure what I'm gonna do about it yet... But I hope I can try to get through it with you~ fighting~ -hugs- ♥
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