I never aimed to be perfect. Perfection was never my goal in life fo I know even if I die and live again I will never achieve that.

But subconsciously I have been doing my best to be perfect.

 

I was afraid of failures

Disappointments

But who isn't?

 

I did my best to avoid all of those things.

I've always thought that I have a perfect life.

I've got a loving and supportive family. We may not be rich but we have enough.

We're happy.

 

But it seems that I have been too hard on myself.

We had a perfect life and I was so afraid that if I made a mistake I'd lose everything.

That if I failed everything would go down the drain.

 

I denied myself of many things.

Among those things was love, fun and friends.

I lost a love because I was so afraid that It would ruin my parents trust.

I rarely had fun because I was afraid that I'd lose focus on my studies and disappoint my parents

I barely had friends because  I was afraid they'd take too much of my time

 

I never had failures

My parents have always been proud of me

But I never noticed that I was being too hard on myself

I tried aiming for things that were out of my reach

Because I thought that would make them even more proud of me.

 

I got ahead  of myself.

Then it hit me like a racing bullet..

I failed to reach my goal.

 

That was my first failure...

It was if my world crumbled from then on.

And the hardest part was to tell them...

That their daughter failed.

 

I broke into sobs.

I was so sorry...

I was expecting disappointed faces from them

but they just smiled

 

"You're not perfect child. Do not try to be and do not be too hard on yourself, you're still young"

 

"Failures are part of life, part of growing up. Experiencing it and overcoming them will make you stronger"

 

I was afraid, but when they held my hands and smiled at me I cried even more. I was embarassed.
They have given me the perfect life yet...

 

"You're grown-up now. You're no longer a girl but you're now a woman with dreams. And expect a lot of failures if you want to pursue your dreams because pursuing them won't be easy. Your mom is right, we are all imperfect, we all had mistakes we all failed in one aspect or another. We're always here by your side to help you stand up again, we'll hold your hands until we can but you also have to stand up using your feet"

 

"We're not disappointed in you, but you are disappointed in yourself because you found out that you're not perfect, you may have not noticed it but you were aiming for perfection child"

 

"We are more proud of a daughter who stood up inspite of failures and learned a lot of lessons in life than a flawless daughter who never learned anything"

 

"And we still love you despite those imperfections dear child, because no amount of failures can lessen our love for you. We are proud of what you've become and what you will become in the future. We've raised you well, and we believe in you and your decisions"

 

I was lucky.

I may even be the luckiest daughter in this world to have them as my parents.

And with that I deicided to stand  up, holding on their hands but using my own feet too.

 

I'm not perfect

Failures will come

Disappointments as well

But I won't be afraid anymore

 

For I know despite all those things. I can stand up with my two feet, I was raised well by them.

And just in case, I know that...

 

I've got a pair of hands to help me up whenever I reach out for them :')