writing.
it's hard.
I really want to post another chaptered fic soon. I don't want to keep posting oneshots, but most of the ideas I get are only good for oneshots, or I begin writing a chaptered story and it dies so quickly. I feel like it's been forever since I had a chaptered story (if you don't count regeneration, the last one was nausea and that one has been completed for months). I like having chaptered stories. I like making regular updates. I have all these ideas that I think are great and I want to put them into fics, but for some reason they get stuck in my brain and they don't translate onto paper and it .
sometimes I feel like writing is too hard and I want to quit it altogether. I'm really afraid of disappointing people so I pressure myself and I become less and less confident about my stories. when I see that I have 100+ or sometimes even 200+ subscribers for just a oneshot I get happy, but at the same time I get scared because there are so many people who will be able to judge me if I up... when I up. and there are so many writers out there who are way better than I am, I'm mediocre at best. I'm sure people will realize this eventually and 'leave me'. and I know it's stupid to feel this way. I'm just an amateur fanfiction writer, this shouldn't affect me so much, but it does. writing is all I can do.
to those of you who have been sticking around even though the quality of my stories is getting gradually worse: I don't know what you're still doing here, but thank you, thank you so much. whenever I see someone who is subscribed to almost all of my stories it makes me happy to know that they have been following me. to those of you who comment on my stories, even if it's just to say "I like it" or "it was good": you are probably the only thing that keeps me going, thank you, thank you so much. I thrive off of feedback, even the negative comments are useful.
thank you.
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