crazy little thing called 'obsession'..

so yeah, this is really my first time to write a blog about me.. and about my feelings right now.. since there's no one in this world can understand me other than my co-b2uties, i decided to post it here.. maybe i just need your little opinion and comments.. i really hope it wouls help me though..

 

i become a beast fan 6 months ago. that time i was so depressed since my dance crew disbanded due to misunderstandings among the members.. and yeah, beast save me from my loneliness.. especially yoseob.. yang yoseob really brought me to be a fan of beast.. at first i was just stalking him on youtube, get some pics of him on the internet and yeah, i used it as my wallpaper.. its about his voice, it was really touching my soul.. it was not in my personality to be impressed at a certain singer, but yoseob changes me.. since im a hiphop dancer, i only appreciate upbeat songs.. but like i said, yang yoseob changed me.. he's so good, his voice, it was something i will never get tired of hearing.. and then BOOM!.. i also love the other members at the end when i watched 'beast documentary'..

it was not about them being singers anymore that i love.. it was them, being boys, being human.. being who they were.. and as usual, especially yang yoseob.. my addiction for him brought me to asianfanfics, to beastrising, and other sites that affiliates them.. so yeah, that time, i know i juts really love them..

 

so its july now, im still a fan of beast.. and the thing is, im also writing a fanfic.. im a dooseob/junseob shipper.. and still, its all because of yoseob.. since day 1 up to now, my bias never change.. it was still yoseob.. my wallpaper changed, but it's still yoseob.. my rigtone changed, im using 'i dunnoooooooo' of yoseob in 'breathe'.. so im really a total addict freak of yang yoseob..

 

as i was browsing earlier tonight, i remembered that yoseob once was casted on 'immortal song 2'.. i remembered that i only heard and watched his bersion of 'mother' and 'with you forever'.. so, i tried to search for his other performnaces on the said show.. and there.. i saw two other performance that i havent watched yet.. so i load it for a while and watch it when its all full..

 

the 'hate you' version of him really stocked in my head up to now.. my heart was really beating fast up to now and im really serious here.. i really dont know what is this im feeling anymore.. his voice, his face, him.. just 'him'.. i really dont know this.. its kinda alien feeling for me..

 

do you guys think that im inlove with yang yoseob?.. or im just obsessed with him?..

im really confused right now.. i just really want to have an answer.. or if you also felt this to him?..

 

and the fact that i have a boyfriend and we are in a relationship for 4 years.. and my mind is really occupied by yoseob and im really starting to ignore my boyfriend because of yang yoseob..

 

tell me guys?.. is is bad?.. what is this feeling really?..

 

im really sad because of that.. i maybe shallow, but yeah.. im really confused right now..

 

*sigh*

 

can anyone help me here?.. :(

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Daetheidiot #1
This post actually explains everything I feel about BEAST and especially Yoseob. Like animegirlfan911 said, it's most likely an obsession. I thought I was in love with him too. Every single second of the day, I'd be thinking and talking about him. But then, I realised I can't picture my future with him. Can you honestly imagine yourself getting married to him?
I just hope you can work this all out. <3
gelzkymint #2
@animegirlfan911 - maybe obsession was the right word for my feelings afterall.. it just so happens that while im watching that 'hate you' perf of yoseob, i didnt replied msg and call of my bf.. and yeah, i prefered staying home just to watch yoseob instead of having date with my bf..

if i were to choose?.. im so scared of answering that.. *sigh*

i know what you're saying about the 'slim' chances.. sis, we all know that its not just slim chances but its 'no chances'.. so yeah, but still, with or without chances, yoseob is still special to me..

oh god, why did you let this happen..

im trying to convert my time for beast on watching anime, maybe it could lessen my 'yoseob problems'..

BTW, i really appreciate your comment and advice.. THANK YOU SO MUCH..
animegirlfan911 #3
Its probably a obsession. You just want to know everything about him and his daily life. You could be in love with him also. How do you feel about your boyfriend? Would you choose Yoseob over him? Just remember, that your chances with Yoseob returning your love is slim. Very Slim. After all, he is a K-pop star. I understand how you feel though. I love every member of b2st for different reasons. I know the difference between love and obsession. You just have to figure it out :)
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