Title: The Messenger from the Past

Author: ShineBFIsland501

Reviewer: ctrl_me

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Title: 5/5

The title's really interesting. I found no mistake in the capitalization.

 

Foreword/Description: 7/10

I have to say that I like your description - defining SHINee and showing the case they're in. However, putting their profiles is unnecessary. You already have THREE character charts so, you can omit the character profiles.

 

Appearance: 10/10

I love the poster! A smiling character in a dark, mystery-themed poster is a big no for me. Surprisingly, So Min's picture there fits!

 

Characters: 6/10

Based from what you wrote about SHINee's profile, only Key's character was already developed. Well, I also found Minho a bit in his character. Since you're still on the third chapter, you can still improve the other members.

 

Plot: 10/10

Well, I really love your plot. Hope you'll end it as exciting as we're expecting it.:))

 

Originality: 10/10

It kinda new, at least for me. I haven't read anything like this yet. Continue with your plot and I'm sure you're going to be successful with this fic of yours.

 

Grammar: 13/20

I found errors on the comma use and capitalization. Here are some of them:

'I saw Key dragging Taemin all the way here to the set looking furious.'

It should be: 'I saw Key dragging Taemin all the way here to the set, looking furious.' Putting a comma there will clearly tell us that Key was looking furious when he entered the set. Without it, it turned out that the set was the one looking furious.

'No can do.'

Hmmm.. I still don't know what you meant here. Maybe 'No, we can't do it.'

'Here's some chips.'

Since 'chips' is in plural form, it should be: 'Here are some chips.'

You mentioned that English isn't your first language but, I have to praise you. Your English is pretty good.:))

 

Flow: 8/10

The flow of your story is a bit fast. There are scenes with no sense. Try to read it again and lengthen those scenes.

 

Overall Enjoyment: 8/10

I love reading mystery novels and I can't wait for you to update!:))

 

Comments: 4/5

There are only few comments but who cares? You're just starting to heat things up. The readers are obviously excited.:))

 

Total: 81/100