part 1 - part 2
I love you, 와이프~ ♥
it's been a while since I did this, but here's a long one.

first some "translations" since our language can be kind of... "insider".

~*~

[1:25:14 AM] 와이프: oh my god folding

[1:25:24 AM] me: folding OTL

[1:25:28 AM] 와이프: i don't want to do it. can I just put all the laundry back on the floor?

[1:25:54 AM] me: no.

[1:26:00 AM] 와이프: TT___TT

[1:28:15 AM] 와이프: I won't be a very good housewife yeobo. I'm sorry

[1:28:28 AM] me: it's okay, we'll have keybum.

[1:28:40 AM] 와이프: good

[1:28:50 AM] 와이프: we should steal jello so he can wash our clothes

[1:29:25 AM] me: of course we'll steal him, he'll be lonely when we've stolen away all of his hyungs

[1:30:02 AM] 와이프: he can do chores for us and wear ridiculously baggy clothing with like 9 layers

[1:30:15 AM] me: until he's old enough.

[1:30:22 AM] 와이프: then he becomes the poolboy

[1:30:51 AM] me: no shirt for you, junhong-ah (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧*:・ﾟ✧

[1:31:13 AM] 와이프: happy 18th birthday! your present is eternal shirtlessness!

[1:31:34 AM] me: it'll be fantastic.

[1:31:37 AM] 와이프: -nods-

[1:31:54 AM] 와이프: we'll have to keep an eye on his old hyung

[1:32:07 AM] me: I think there are several people we need to keep an eye on...

[1:32:19 AM] 와이프: everyone. all of them will want junhongah

[1:33:04 AM] me: there's someone else who likes young, blonde (jello is not blonde anymore, but whatever) boys

[1:33:16 AM] me: http://28.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lvxmliWUYs1r4vbojo1_500.jpg

[1:33:18 AM] 와이프: oldoppar?

[1:33:28 AM] 와이프: yes oldoppar~

[1:33:39 AM] 와이프: he'll be a risk too

[1:33:58 AM] me: him and sleazy both

[1:34:03 AM] 와이프: sleazy is the real risk

[1:34:11 AM] me: maybe sleazy has realized that he can't have kimchi so he needs someone else

[1:34:16 AM] me: jello would be a great choice

[1:34:18 AM] 와이프: he'll tell jello that yongguk  doesn't love him

[1:34:40 AM] me: "look, junhong... he clearly likes that other pretty hyung"

[1:35:06 AM] 와이프: "You'll have all of my love. I won't around with other men like that bastard"

[1:35:34 AM] me: I just realized that yongguk and sleazy are same-aged

[1:35:41 AM] 와이프: they are

[1:36:15 AM] 와이프: oldoppar and baby have the same as yongguk and jello

[1:36:38 AM] me: they do not, baby is daehyun-aged

[1:36:53 AM] me: oh yes, then they do

[1:37:00 AM] me: yes

[1:37:06 AM] me: my brain + math = chaos

[1:42:07 AM] 와이프: bahahaha

[1:42:19 AM] 와이프: the old men can get together and talk about how they screw teenagers

[1:43:26 AM] me: they can sit by the poolside and watch baby and jello as they clean the pool

[1:43:56 AM] 와이프: -nods-

[1:44:25 AM] 와이프: baby can rub it in jello's face that oldoppar isn't as hard to get as yongguk is

[1:45:06 AM] me: and jello will sulk and that is where sleazy comes in...

[1:45:21 AM] 와이프: he'll be easy to steal away

[1:46:04 AM] me: he'll tell jello how he has no problem with taking off his clothes

[1:46:16 AM] 와이프: and jello likes

[1:47:20 AM] me: and since yonggukkie hyung doesn't want to give in

[1:47:26 AM] me: he has to find somewhere else to get it

[1:48:03 AM] 와이프: then himchan can snatch up yongguk

[1:48:25 AM] me: it's perfect.

[1:48:36 AM] 와이프: himchan set it all up in the beginning -nods-

[1:49:35 AM] me: I bet he could be friends with woosang too.

1) sameage.

2) ridiculously vain fabulous guy.

[1:49:51 AM] 와이프: they're perfect for each other

[1:50:22 AM] 와이프: and youngjae can just try to get daehyun all day every day

[1:50:31 AM] me: sangsoo and hime are buddies. hime wants yongguk. sangsoo wants young . they make a deal.

[1:51:08 AM] me: daejae are bunnies and moontos got stolen away by exo.

[1:51:22 AM] me: I like our mansion.

[1:51:31 AM] 와이프: our mansion is practically a set

[1:51:52 AM] me: of course, that's the point of it.

[1:51:59 AM] 와이프: tao took a liking to moontos so krees walks over one day, picks him up, and then carries him off

[1:52:56 AM] me: they tried to stop him, but duizhang stared at them really hard so they backed off.

[1:53:01 AM] me: kris is scary as .

[1:53:19 AM] 와이프: moontos was just too short to fight

[1:53:30 AM] me: "krees-oppar, I want to play with the cute bunny, bbuing bbuing"

[1:53:36 AM] me: and krees had no way of resisting

[1:53:43 AM] 와이프: and then moontos became a slave bunny

[1:53:56 AM] me: of course.

[1:54:22 AM] 와이프: krees makes sure tao doesn't get too rough with him

[1:55:57 AM] me: he watches over them as they play like a good leader

[1:56:45 AM] 와이프: and b.a.p. carries on as though they never had a short dancer

[1:57:31 AM] me: because kris is scary as and they're kind of busy doing their own thing.

[1:57:42 AM] 와이프: it's for the best that way

[1:58:29 AM] me: it probably is. nothing good can come out of coming between tao and his playtoy.

[1:58:59 AM] 와이프: moontos can earn his freedom later when another cute plaything catches wushu's eyes

[1:59:50 AM] me: maybe he'll figure out that he has a thing for buns...

[2:00:18 AM] 와이프: or krees will become infinitely richer

[2:01:11 AM] me: or that

[2:02:47 AM] 와이프: we need cameras every where

[2:03:33 AM] me: we need to film everything.

[2:04:37 AM] me: there is another blonde baby who should be at our mansion to distract all these old oppars

[2:04:41 AM] me: http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m3i9h2iL2b1qfddpjo1_400.jpg

[2:04:51 AM] 와이프: which?

[2:05:00 AM] 와이프: baby and jello will hate him

[2:05:21 AM] me: they'll hate him because he's prettier so all the old oppars want to touch

[2:06:01 AM] 와이프: sangsoo, yongguk, and oldoppar will abandon their teenagers for the pretty one

[2:06:35 AM] me: princess can't work at the pool.

[2:06:46 AM] 와이프: they would drown him

[2:06:57 AM] me: he can work with keybum and keybum will teach him how to keep the boys away.

[2:07:03 AM] 와이프: it would be for the best

[2:07:24 AM] me: "see this? this is a spatula. it can come in handy. allow me to demonstrate... jonghyun~~~ come here~~~"

[2:07:43 AM] 와이프: keybum will be the perfect mentor for minki

[2:07:58 AM] me: keybum and kevin

[2:08:27 AM] 와이프: and seungie can teach him how to use 4D powers

[2:08:46 AM] me: he'll need to be taught stuff, he doesn't know how to use it right.

[2:09:07 AM] 와이프: "When your boyfriend is talking about with other people you have to casually start stripping."

[2:09:35 AM] me: "that's how you get his attention"

[2:09:57 AM] 와이프: "Then you hold girls hands to punish him for being a jackass"

[2:10:11 AM] me: oh, princess will be so confused because seungie will tell him to take his clothes off and keybum will tell him to smack all the boys if they get too close.

[2:10:23 AM] me: princess will be the biggest tease ever and he doesn't even realize it.

[2:10:27 AM] 와이프: he'll never know which approach to take

[2:10:49 AM] me: poor princess. I feel bad for him now.

[2:11:08 AM] me: I think he does alright at chasing away the boys right now, though

[2:11:13 AM] me: http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m3ib8p5KyI1qelshx.gif

[2:11:15 AM] 와이프: he rages so well

[2:11:36 AM] 와이프: luhan will be in danger too

[2:11:49 AM] me: luhan is too pretty for his own good.

[2:11:57 AM] me: sehun will be super possessive and lock luhan in his room.

[2:11:58 AM] 와이프: the old hyungs will want him because he looks young

[2:12:14 AM] me: that's the thing.  he looks young but he isn't so he's even better.

[2:12:20 AM] me: they can't go to jail for touching him.

[2:12:27 AM] 와이프: he's perfect for yongguk

[2:12:44 AM] me: but yongguk has hime

[2:13:12 AM] 와이프: but luhan looks so young and pretty

[2:13:24 AM] 와이프: yongguk's eyes seem to stray regularly

[2:13:29 AM] me: they're even sameaged, it's perfect.

[2:13:38 AM] me: hime and baby lu are like one day apart.

[2:13:46 AM] 와이프: this is true

[2:15:01 AM] me: but baby lu looks 12, so it's great

[2:15:13 AM] 와이프: he has the best of both worlds

[2:15:42 AM] me: exactly.

[2:16:22 AM] 와이프: tao can offer him as payment for moontos

[2:17:19 AM] me: "you give me small dancer, I give you my young-looking ge, bbuing bbuing"

[2:17:54 AM] 와이프: his first step into the trade

[2:18:44 AM] me: then later he will trade moontos for someone who can give him a lot of gucci

[2:19:13 AM] 와이프: poor moontos is just too desirable

[2:19:41 AM] me: it's his own fault. he's all existing and such.

[2:19:45 AM] 와이프: truth

so yes... this is how our brains work. >:3 are you scared yet?
this will go on my "things to do instead of writing baekyeol"-list.
someone shoot me. OTL