BARE WITH ME!!!!!! Q.Q
AM I THAT BITTER?
Okay. I just want to share something cause I cant keep it myself. Im not bitter, am I?
But first, I want to ask you something.
How much does your bias means to you? Is it enough to let you loose a friend?? (i dont know, im just curious cuz this is where you'll depend your opinion to this blog...)
So here it goes.....
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There was a friend of mine. Well, we're friends before, i guess we're not by now. She was sweet and friendly, and she's someone special for me. SHE'S LIKE A SISTER TO ME, THATS HOW IMPORTANT SHE IS! She's not that young, 14-15 yrs old. We used to communicate with each other via facebook and other social networking sites. But I guess were done now.
We used to have misunderstandings. But because I know I am older and she has a childish personality, sometimes Im the who made a move for us to make up.
At first, there, we are able to make up. I forgive her, she forgives me. I understand her, she understands me. That was a little childish issue about logging out on fb. (i'll swear you'll be disgusted if you heard the reason why she hated me that time, not actually hate, some kinda 'tampo'..its a tagalog word sorry i dont know how to say it in english.)
And for the second time, it was about her bias (thats why i asked you the question above).
SHE HATES ME, SHE REALLY HATES ME SO MUCH.
Why?
I liked her bias or simply her bias became my bias too. At first she was sending group messages saying that she hates THAT GUY (she was refering to me, just trying to hide it by saying it was a guy.) BECAUSE HE WAS A COPY CAT (she was trying to say im a copy cat cuz we had the same bias.)
At first I was like, 'okay, here's her childish act again.' ., I tried to make it up. I asked her what can I do. I also said I wont like her bias anymore. But she replied, "Its not that easy.". I turned out like, WTF DID I DO?!
I put a message on her ask box(tumblr) asking if we could make up. I wrote there sweet msgs from my heart (com'on i know its korney but i really want us to make up). But there was no response. Even on fb msgs, she didnt even bother to reply or even like it. So that PISSED ME OFF.
I told myself. "FINE, I GIVE UP. IF THATS WHAT SHE WANTS THEN GO!"
I was so bitter that time. I feel like Im a CRIMINAL!
I sent a group message(including her), it says that im already tired and pissed off of trying to make it up. If she really hates me, i guess theres nothing i can do about it. Im already tired of understanding those kind of childish reasons.
This past few nights, I swear I cried about it because I never thought that I'd loose our friendship.
But I guess I should forget about it and I SHOULD REALLY THROW THAT STUPID FRIENSHIP WITH HER AWAY. Because there is something I realized at the end.....
HER BIAS IS MORE MEANINGFUL AND IMPORTANT FOR HER THAN OUR FRIENDSHIP...
And that was the most painful part for me. That she was able to choose her bias that she doesnt even know if it would like her or not.
I hated myself at first because I thought it was my fault. I even told myself that I WAS DAMN STUPID FOR CHOOSING HIM AS MY BIAS.
But then, I said,"! I DIDNT DO ANYTHING. SHE WAS JUST OVER ACTING!"
Until now, Im trying to ask her to remove me on facebook. I want to end all our possible communications. Because it made me feel more bitter everytime I saw her post.
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Thats it. Sorry if I wasted your time. I just want to get it out of my chest. You could share me your opinion. Do you think what i did was right? Dont hesitate to post a comment. I would love it.
I hope she could read this. I dont care if she'd hate me more, what important is I was able to share my side. This thing kept on bothering me and I hate it. I just want to forget about it.
To all my friends: Guys I hope you know how much important you are to me. Im hoping that we'll never end up like that way. I dont want to loose a friend anymore. PLEASE...
And to that person: Hey, did this made you hate me more? Im sorry. I just want to let this burden out of me. And thats it...
>>> END OF THE DRAMA <<<<
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