Being an adult
"You're still my home, Aeri. And you will always be"
Aeri frowns her eyebrows and then disagreeably shakes her head lightly.
"Jimin, I'm not your home. I can't be your home."
They haven't been talking enough since Jimin started to distance herself away from people. Isolating herself after losing her way. But Jimin has always had Aeri. Some goes for Aeri, she has always had Jimin when everything starts to get lost.
"Is it really the end of us, aeri?"
"No, Jimin. It's not". However Aeri has changed. "I just hope you want more for yourself."
Aeri knows Jimin is still the same. There's no joy in her face. Things are getting much harder for her and it's getting really hard for her to ignore. Jimin has been so hard on herself and she's about to surrender. But Aeri hopes for the better for her.
So many feelings accumulated inside Jimin, struggling to leave .
"Jimin" called Aeri while placing her hands on both of her shoulders. "I hope you will still run to every wish and dream of yours. I know things are messed up right now in our each life, but we can't go back and start a new beginning, Jimin. But we can start now and make a new ending. I believe the bright future ahead is waiting for you. And I want you to see it by yourself."
Jimin looks into her eyes. That was the moment when she realised that Aeri had changed. Aeri is healed. She's no longer colonised under her own fear. She's no longer oppressed by her own anxiety. She overcomes her painfully numb scars. By showing Jimin as an utter coward who's still barely survived in her own life and exposing her for the weak coward she is.
"I'm such a loser." she started to cry.
"You're not, Jimin. Even if you are, it's really okay to be like one. You don't have to be always happy. You don't have to be always strong. You don't have to always be good. Those will keep cycling, it's just how life goes on"
It's a basic thing to know. People know that fact, including Jimin. But it gives her a relief and a big realisation, because it sounds right. It does.
Jimin feels Aeri has the power to help her bring the sun to her darkest days. Giving her relief and consolation with her little pat and simple words.
"Don't leave me, Aeri" she sobs inside her hug.
Aeri pats her back lightly.
"I won't leave, Jimin. I'll be available to be whatever you want me to be. I'll be your lover if you are willing to give me your heart. And I'll be your friend if doubt and fear are still haunting you about what you feel or what I feel towards you."
"You said you want me to want more for myself. You should too, aeri."
"I do. Having this courage to tell you those things. I'm currently pursuing a part of my happiness."
Jimin asks herself once again. Why she wasn't sure of her relationship with Aeri. Why she doubted the confession Aeri told her. But was it really aeri? No, It was Jimin. Jimin doubted herself. She wasn't sure about herself.
Because she wasn't able to heal herself yet.
Jimin lifts her head from the floor. She is waiting and listening to Aeri's next words.
"I'll be listening when no one isn't. So please, stay. That's all I need"