정하연 IS READY TO RETURN (cw // mentions of social anxiety)
jeong hayeon
jeong hayeon
taylor swift
mirrorball
mirrorball
scroll right
the face
nicknames.
; yeon / short for hayeon, used by friends and relatives.
; yeon-yeonie / on days when hayeon was more adamant about not taking part in the friend group's shenanigans, junghee would always pull out the 'yeon-yeonie' card. it's a nickname reserved for junghee only, even if the girl often received a half-hearted glare in return.
; ghost / it was a joking nickname at first, often used to chide hayeon for being so meek and detached within the group. however, as time passed and she grew more distant, it eventually turned into a more hostile way to refer to the girl that was once their friend; she had disappeared on them after graduation, afterall.
; yeon-yeonie / on days when hayeon was more adamant about not taking part in the friend group's shenanigans, junghee would always pull out the 'yeon-yeonie' card. it's a nickname reserved for junghee only, even if the girl often received a half-hearted glare in return.
; ghost / it was a joking nickname at first, often used to chide hayeon for being so meek and detached within the group. however, as time passed and she grew more distant, it eventually turned into a more hostile way to refer to the girl that was once their friend; she had disappeared on them after graduation, afterall.
place of birth. tongyeong, south korea.
uality. homoual
languages.
; korean / native language / she gradually makes the transition from the south gyeongsang dialect spoken in tongyeong to that of daegu, where she currently lives, but the differences are still somewhat little. when travelling back home she finds herself speaking to relatives and whatnot with the south dialect anyways, so she's mildly put-off when some of her old friends come back speaking in a more standard korean/seoul dialect.
; english / good, working knowledge / hayeon found herself picking up the language quite quickly, having done particularly well in her written english classes at school. it comes in handy with a degree in computer science, where many of the programming languages used are in english. she knows enough to initiate small talk, and coding terms are stuck in her mind after careless typos during late night crams and subsequently lower grades than she'd like.
; korean / native language / she gradually makes the transition from the south gyeongsang dialect spoken in tongyeong to that of daegu, where she currently lives, but the differences are still somewhat little. when travelling back home she finds herself speaking to relatives and whatnot with the south dialect anyways, so she's mildly put-off when some of her old friends come back speaking in a more standard korean/seoul dialect.
; english / good, working knowledge / hayeon found herself picking up the language quite quickly, having done particularly well in her written english classes at school. it comes in handy with a degree in computer science, where many of the programming languages used are in english. she knows enough to initiate small talk, and coding terms are stuck in her mind after careless typos during late night crams and subsequently lower grades than she'd like.
appearance.
; had longer black hair throughout most of her childhood + high school, but cut it to shoulder-length upon moving to the city. (yeeun with her mid-length bob and black hair? no clue which era lol) Hayeon usually dyes her hair dark brown, but between creeping deadlines and an increasingly unsteady job at a pizza parlor, she hasn't been finding the time - by the start of the story it's mostly faded back to black.
; has a few ear piercings - one silver hoop at the helix that she got recently, and two black studs at the lobes - the second piercing was from high school.
; has a few ear piercings - one silver hoop at the helix that she got recently, and two black studs at the lobes - the second piercing was from high school.
style.
; often wears neutral colours or black.
; comfy, loose-fitting sweaters. often under old graphics tees, the same denim jacket she's had for years.
; pairs of washed out jeans, some left with unintentional rips, but others repaired sloppily with her own sewing skills.
; lace-up black boots are her favourite pair. otherwise she cycles through a handful of pairs of various coloured sneakers, the soles slightly beat up from her tendency to shuffle her feet when forced to stay still.
; most of her clothes are from when she was in high-school as she doesn't have the extra money to spend on new clothes. consequently, they don't always fit very snugly, but they work.
; her pizza parlour uniform is a black shirt with their logo, along with one of her pairs of jeans and some comfy (unsurprisingly old) converses.
; comfy, loose-fitting sweaters. often under old graphics tees, the same denim jacket she's had for years.
; pairs of washed out jeans, some left with unintentional rips, but others repaired sloppily with her own sewing skills.
; lace-up black boots are her favourite pair. otherwise she cycles through a handful of pairs of various coloured sneakers, the soles slightly beat up from her tendency to shuffle her feet when forced to stay still.
; most of her clothes are from when she was in high-school as she doesn't have the extra money to spend on new clothes. consequently, they don't always fit very snugly, but they work.
; her pizza parlour uniform is a black shirt with their logo, along with one of her pairs of jeans and some comfy (unsurprisingly old) converses.
the core
personality.
intp. virgo. type 4 - the individualist.
[+] logical, imaginative, altruistic, stoic [+/-] reserved, idealistic [-] insecure, envious, detached, sensitive
[+] logical, imaginative, altruistic, stoic [+/-] reserved, idealistic [-] insecure, envious, detached, sensitive
; she's made herself into a mirrorball — little pieces reflecting the shine of those around her, with no trace of jeong hayeon to be seen. from a young age hayeon's been doing things for other people, mainly her parents, who really just wanted their only daughter to be successful and happy. as she entered her teenage years, hayeon's sense of self only became more confusing, and she finds comfort in shaping herself to be the hayeon that people want or expect her to be. she doesn't know what to do with herself, and with such a lack of stable identity, her sense of self essentially relies on the idea that she thinks others have of her. she doesn't necessarily live to please everyone, but she's the type that when in doubt would think, "what would my parents expect me to do?", "what would junghee say?", etc. even as she ventures into a journey of finding herself in daegu, she still subconsciously makes her decisions based on others, even if she manifests it differently; now, hayeon does things that she knows the people she left behind would not think possible.
; her brain is a pandora's box full of ideas - there's an elaborate, beautiful world in her mind, yet one wrong move could cast a dark, turbulent storm around it. hayeon is often lost in her thoughts, blank-facedly dreaming of living in a magical fairytale world with those important to her. one simple thought or word has the ability to spiral into many creative ideas. hayeon's ability to think up fascinating concepts is remarkable, but her gift of a vivid imagination comes with the curse of spiralling anxious thoughts. she loses sleep and finds herself incredibly awkward and self-conscious around someone because of an offhand comment attacking her fragile sense of self; other times, when they get particularly out of hand, her thoughts instead turn on her, ending with hayeon blaming herself for things that other people are just as (or even more) responsible for.
; hayeon likes to think more than she likes to feel, but she feels more than she likes to think. often she'd spend time intellectualising her emotions as a way to cope with them, rationalising with herself to try and figure it out. it calms her down and keeps her from being too emotionally driven, therefore lessening her tendencies to make stupid mistakes due to certain strong feelings. though often, trying to articulate her emotions into something that is familiar and makes sense can get too much, too overwhelming, so she'd shoo them away and save her thoughts for the next time she has to face them inevitably, never really dealing with them in a truly healthy way.
; she hides the storm within with a stone-cold stare and a small, ingenuine smile. other people might just see hayeon as someone who's indifferent and doesn't care about what goes on around her, and she wouldn't blame them. no one could say they really know who hayeon is, at least not internally, and she's learnt to be fine with that. there is a lot — too much — inside her that she would never dare show. she can't enjoy doing anything without feeling like there's something wrong, like it's not enough; her self-esteem is crumbling; she feels like an unnecessary baggage wherever she goes; and she doesn't have a clue who the hell she really is. hayeon has multiple internal conflicts draining her all at once, leaving her with little energy to really be there, even if she'd like to. there's constant reminders that she isn't alone: her parents, jaehwan, junghee... even her- no, junghee's friends offered their shoulders to cry on, and even at her worst of times, when she wanted nothing but to wail in someone's arms as they told her it's going to be okay, she dismissed them. opening up is difficult, especially to people who hardly really know. they wouldn't understand, they'd just walk away, wanting nothing to do with it, with her.
; her brain is a pandora's box full of ideas - there's an elaborate, beautiful world in her mind, yet one wrong move could cast a dark, turbulent storm around it. hayeon is often lost in her thoughts, blank-facedly dreaming of living in a magical fairytale world with those important to her. one simple thought or word has the ability to spiral into many creative ideas. hayeon's ability to think up fascinating concepts is remarkable, but her gift of a vivid imagination comes with the curse of spiralling anxious thoughts. she loses sleep and finds herself incredibly awkward and self-conscious around someone because of an offhand comment attacking her fragile sense of self; other times, when they get particularly out of hand, her thoughts instead turn on her, ending with hayeon blaming herself for things that other people are just as (or even more) responsible for.
; hayeon likes to think more than she likes to feel, but she feels more than she likes to think. often she'd spend time intellectualising her emotions as a way to cope with them, rationalising with herself to try and figure it out. it calms her down and keeps her from being too emotionally driven, therefore lessening her tendencies to make stupid mistakes due to certain strong feelings. though often, trying to articulate her emotions into something that is familiar and makes sense can get too much, too overwhelming, so she'd shoo them away and save her thoughts for the next time she has to face them inevitably, never really dealing with them in a truly healthy way.
; she hides the storm within with a stone-cold stare and a small, ingenuine smile. other people might just see hayeon as someone who's indifferent and doesn't care about what goes on around her, and she wouldn't blame them. no one could say they really know who hayeon is, at least not internally, and she's learnt to be fine with that. there is a lot — too much — inside her that she would never dare show. she can't enjoy doing anything without feeling like there's something wrong, like it's not enough; her self-esteem is crumbling; she feels like an unnecessary baggage wherever she goes; and she doesn't have a clue who the hell she really is. hayeon has multiple internal conflicts draining her all at once, leaving her with little energy to really be there, even if she'd like to. there's constant reminders that she isn't alone: her parents, jaehwan, junghee... even her- no, junghee's friends offered their shoulders to cry on, and even at her worst of times, when she wanted nothing but to wail in someone's arms as they told her it's going to be okay, she dismissed them. opening up is difficult, especially to people who hardly really know. they wouldn't understand, they'd just walk away, wanting nothing to do with it, with her.
background.
; in her childhood, hayeon observed the fire from the outside, preferring to keep her feet in snow, where no one could give her warmth and then take it away. as a kid, she was silent and observant; too much so for her age, barely engaging with the children of family friends who chided their kids to befriend the quiet little jeong in their class. she shied out of people's attention, not wanting to be the one whose shoelaces were tied together when she wasn't looking. even her concerned teachers noticed her detached nature, and concluded it was best to give her the space until she reached out to her classmates on her own. otherwise, hayeon functioned well both in and out of school. she got good grades and was interested in the same things other kids liked - she just didn't want to explore other things they had in common. antisocial behaviour aside, hayeon's parents thought their daughter was doing just fine. as soon as she could comprehend the idea of the future, hayeon figured exactly what her parents wanted for her; a secure life, where she'd do well in her studies, graduate high school, go to a community college and settle down in tongyeong with a man from around town. she had been a mere child, clueless of what she wanted to do herself, so she took it upon herself to follow the path her parents had laid out.
; by her first year of middle school, hayeon had been a known lone wolf. and yet, the sun insisted she needed a pack. jeong hayeon was never explicitly told that her lack of friendship wasn't ideal, and so she was content with a non-existent desire to enter any middle school social circles. the one person who decided to intervene manifested itself in one lee junghee, hayeon's seatmate throughout seventh grade; resident miss sunshine. hayeon had groaned inwardly upon coming to school and seeing such a bright smile on a monday morning.
; in her childhood, hayeon observed the fire from the outside, preferring to keep her feet in snow, where no one could give her warmth and then take it away. as a kid, she was silent and observant; too much so for her age, barely engaging with the children of family friends who chided their kids to befriend the quiet little jeong in their class. she shied out of people's attention, not wanting to be the one whose shoelaces were tied together when she wasn't looking. even her concerned teachers noticed her detached nature, and concluded it was best to give her the space until she reached out to her classmates on her own. otherwise, hayeon functioned well both in and out of school. she got good grades and was interested in the same things other kids liked - she just didn't want to explore other things they had in common. antisocial behaviour aside, hayeon's parents thought their daughter was doing just fine. as soon as she could comprehend the idea of the future, hayeon figured exactly what her parents wanted for her; a secure life, where she'd do well in her studies, graduate high school, go to a community college and settle down in tongyeong with a man from around town. she had been a mere child, clueless of what she wanted to do herself, so she took it upon herself to follow the path her parents had laid out.
; by her first year of middle school, hayeon had been a known lone wolf. and yet, the sun insisted she needed a pack. jeong hayeon was never explicitly told that her lack of friendship wasn't ideal, and so she was content with a non-existent desire to enter any middle school social circles. the one person who decided to intervene manifested itself in one lee junghee, hayeon's seatmate throughout seventh grade; resident miss sunshine. hayeon had groaned inwardly upon coming to school and seeing such a bright smile on a monday morning.
junghee was persistent in making friends with hayeon, blabbering about trivial things and reciting random anecdotes about her day to her disinterested seatmate. if the lesson was dreadful then hayeon sometimes listened, because she'd take junghee's horrible storytelling over mrs kim's long rants about history any day. halfway through the year junghee finally took the hint and stayed quiet... and hayeon hated it. she'd grown accustomed to junghee's chattiness, her excited voice becoming background music of sorts for each class. the silence leaves a deafening gap, and after a week hayeon reluctantly starts a conversation with a peer for the first time since ever. the look of surprise and eventual delight on junghee's face had been one that hayeon could never forget. hayeon decided she wanted to see junghee like that more, even if it means getting sent to after-school detention by mrs kim for not paying attention in history every day.
junghee and hayeon formed a quick class-exclusive friendship, consisting of junghee being her usual bubbly self, her sunlight bouncing off of hayeon and giving the latter a faint light within herself that she didn't have access to before. despite her uninterested exterior, hayeon really enjoyed being junghee's friend, so when seventh grade came to an end and they no longer had the assurance of being in the same class for the next year, junghee took it upon herself to invite hayeon to the friend group she hung out with. hayeon had been frozen in place — a group? was she getting herself into one of those social circles? what if they're mean and didn't like people like hayeon? what if she accidentally drove them away and made junghee sad? her thoughts spiralled and her breath hitched and she wanted to run away, but she made the mistake of looking at junghee's hopeful, pleading face. she told her brain to shut up. "how could i say no?"
; hayeon was let into a warm cottage in a snowstorm; fun, comforting, cosy. and yet, she remained in a corner of the house, away from the fire, because she wasn't used to warmth after so long in the cold. tldr hayeon was welcomed with open arms but her social anxiety was horrible and she kept her distance. she clung to junghee, but the more she realised that junghee treated them all so nicely, she felt less special, and her grip on junghee loosened a bit too. this is also when she realises she is not straight and has a big fat crush on one miss sunshine.
; the camera lens of hayeon's future had focused on a stable, easy life in tongyeong, but when high school rolled around, it started to shift and lose its focus. high school was when she realised computers are what she's good at, and she wanted to pursue a career where she could make use of that skill; a good enough reason for her to leave her hometown. hayeon feels suffocated in tongyeong. she longs for a way out, but doesn't want to disappoint her parents... there's also the fact that early into high school, hayeon realises her disinterest in boys isn't something that would change in time — and that she instead holds these kind of feelings for junghee, who is blissfully unaware and also slipping out of hayeon's reach. she acts like her usual self whenever her friends invite her out; she smiles when needed, keeps her arms crossed, engages curtly in small talk when coaxed into it. hayeon is composed as ever in front of people, so they're all unaware; she's stressed, her grades are dropping, she doesn't know what to do anymore.
; a young bird flaps her wings and soars off the tree where she was raised; her flight is unsteady, and she looks back reluctantly, wondering if leaving now was the right thing to do. she left tongyeong as a way to break free of the idea held by her parents — to settle down and find a stable job at home — and at the same time took it as an opportunity to get away from everyone here; the part of the friend group that stayed home, the family friends, maybe even junghee. hayeon felt there was less of an obligation to keep in touch if she'd chosen to leave it all behind. her parents insisted on paying for college because her grades had unfortunately dropped to a point where she couldn't get a scholarship (though they weren't bad), and because she's guilty and finds this counterproductive to her mission of independence, she is just as insistent on providing for herself otherwise. this was something that she wanted.
; hayeon was let into a warm cottage in a snowstorm; fun, comforting, cosy. and yet, she remained in a corner of the house, away from the fire, because she wasn't used to warmth after so long in the cold. tldr hayeon was welcomed with open arms but her social anxiety was horrible and she kept her distance. she clung to junghee, but the more she realised that junghee treated them all so nicely, she felt less special, and her grip on junghee loosened a bit too. this is also when she realises she is not straight and has a big fat crush on one miss sunshine.
; the camera lens of hayeon's future had focused on a stable, easy life in tongyeong, but when high school rolled around, it started to shift and lose its focus. high school was when she realised computers are what she's good at, and she wanted to pursue a career where she could make use of that skill; a good enough reason for her to leave her hometown. hayeon feels suffocated in tongyeong. she longs for a way out, but doesn't want to disappoint her parents... there's also the fact that early into high school, hayeon realises her disinterest in boys isn't something that would change in time — and that she instead holds these kind of feelings for junghee, who is blissfully unaware and also slipping out of hayeon's reach. she acts like her usual self whenever her friends invite her out; she smiles when needed, keeps her arms crossed, engages curtly in small talk when coaxed into it. hayeon is composed as ever in front of people, so they're all unaware; she's stressed, her grades are dropping, she doesn't know what to do anymore.
; a young bird flaps her wings and soars off the tree where she was raised; her flight is unsteady, and she looks back reluctantly, wondering if leaving now was the right thing to do. she left tongyeong as a way to break free of the idea held by her parents — to settle down and find a stable job at home — and at the same time took it as an opportunity to get away from everyone here; the part of the friend group that stayed home, the family friends, maybe even junghee. hayeon felt there was less of an obligation to keep in touch if she'd chosen to leave it all behind. her parents insisted on paying for college because her grades had unfortunately dropped to a point where she couldn't get a scholarship (though they weren't bad), and because she's guilty and finds this counterproductive to her mission of independence, she is just as insistent on providing for herself otherwise. this was something that she wanted.
but as she navigates daegu, just bustling and busy enough to distract her momentarily, she starts to wonder if the decision was less to do with her having a desire to branch out, and more with her refusal to cave into everyone's expectations: "i'll still have some people around, so i won't be lonely! right, hayeon?" "your father and i can't wait to visit when you get your own house just down the road."should she have stayed?
likes.
- cats: probably her favourite animals, as she grew up with one and enjoys cuddling with them.
- classic barbie movies: the amazed feelings she had as a child watching the barbie movies never really went away, and although she now recognises the odd characterisation in some, and the low quality animation in nearly all of them ("i don't remember the movements being that funky, i swear"), the characters and stories of the older films have a special place in her heart, reminding her of the magic and sparkles she'd always wanted for herself as a child.
- Cheap deals: she's become a bit of a cheapskate since providing for herself was harder than she thought with only one job to accomodate her. combo meals and buy one take one sales? right up her alley.
- coffee: nothing like a takeaway cup of mochaccino to down right before her morning lectures. hayeon's procrastination habits combined with a stubborn desire to finish her projects to a high standard means numerous all-nighters, and though she doesn't like to rely on caffeine to keep awake, she doesn't have much of a choice. besides, the local cafe makes the best coffees.
- monopoly: hayeon likes working with numbers ($$$), and because she calculates her every move, she almost always wins monopoly games - even ones she begrudgingly gets pulled into by junghee, or later jaehwan's family.
dislikes.
likes.
- cats: probably her favourite animals, as she grew up with one and enjoys cuddling with them.
- classic barbie movies: the amazed feelings she had as a child watching the barbie movies never really went away, and although she now recognises the odd characterisation in some, and the low quality animation in nearly all of them ("i don't remember the movements being that funky, i swear"), the characters and stories of the older films have a special place in her heart, reminding her of the magic and sparkles she'd always wanted for herself as a child.
- Cheap deals: she's become a bit of a cheapskate since providing for herself was harder than she thought with only one job to accomodate her. combo meals and buy one take one sales? right up her alley.
- coffee: nothing like a takeaway cup of mochaccino to down right before her morning lectures. hayeon's procrastination habits combined with a stubborn desire to finish her projects to a high standard means numerous all-nighters, and though she doesn't like to rely on caffeine to keep awake, she doesn't have much of a choice. besides, the local cafe makes the best coffees.
- monopoly: hayeon likes working with numbers ($$$), and because she calculates her every move, she almost always wins monopoly games - even ones she begrudgingly gets pulled into by junghee, or later jaehwan's family.
dislikes.
- fish: hayeon does not appreciate the time it takes to pick out the bones in fish due to her fear of swallowing a fish bone and choking on it. also, it smells bad. hayeon would only eat fish in sushi or as a fillet.
- social gatherings: having social anxiety and going to a place just to interact with people is not a good combination, so this one's pretty self-explanatory. if ever forced to come to one you could find hayeon eating or on her phone in a corner, maybe with the friend who forced her to come.
- comic sans: the font is just hideous. having done an assignment on earlier websites where essentially all of them used comic sans broke hayeon. it is an eyesore. if she sees anyone using it, she will rage.
- forgetting her earphones: awkward silences where you're all fully aware of the mood can be easily avoided with earphones, but not so much when you don't have them to save you. sadly for her, hayeon is very forgetful.
- laggy computers: a procrastinating programming student's worst enemy is a frozen computer screen, as hayeon points out to jaehwan, the morning after a breakdown over her hard coding work being restarted an hour before the deadline. she types very quickly and her old macbook could hardly keep up, which causes a lot of typos and annoying errors. she is saving up for a new computer, but they cost a lot and she doesn't earn all that much from her job.
habits.
- social gatherings: having social anxiety and going to a place just to interact with people is not a good combination, so this one's pretty self-explanatory. if ever forced to come to one you could find hayeon eating or on her phone in a corner, maybe with the friend who forced her to come.
- comic sans: the font is just hideous. having done an assignment on earlier websites where essentially all of them used comic sans broke hayeon. it is an eyesore. if she sees anyone using it, she will rage.
- forgetting her earphones: awkward silences where you're all fully aware of the mood can be easily avoided with earphones, but not so much when you don't have them to save you. sadly for her, hayeon is very forgetful.
- laggy computers: a procrastinating programming student's worst enemy is a frozen computer screen, as hayeon points out to jaehwan, the morning after a breakdown over her hard coding work being restarted an hour before the deadline. she types very quickly and her old macbook could hardly keep up, which causes a lot of typos and annoying errors. she is saving up for a new computer, but they cost a lot and she doesn't earn all that much from her job.
habits.
- hayeon has a tendency to bounce her leg or play with her hands in situations requiring her to sit still. sometimes, when particularly anxious, her nail biting habit comes back, although she got rid of it years ago.
hobbies.
hobbies.
- coding: has had a fixation with computers since she was a kid, and taught herself basic coding once she was old enough to comprehend it. she particularly likes working with html and css, and consequently wants a job relating to web design.
- art: is nowhere near raon's level of talent, but she enjoys art and finds that doodling helps her pay attention in classes or lectures, somehow. often draws people and likes to draw people (read: girls) she finds pretty.
- gaming: mainly animal crossing, but also the batman arkham games and a select few. takes gta and not getting caught way too seriously.
trivia.
- art: is nowhere near raon's level of talent, but she enjoys art and finds that doodling helps her pay attention in classes or lectures, somehow. often draws people and likes to draw people (read: girls) she finds pretty.
- gaming: mainly animal crossing, but also the batman arkham games and a select few. takes gta and not getting caught way too seriously.
trivia.
- hayeon shows symptoms of adhd (add mainly), but doesn't really do anything to fix it. as with many things she's learned to live with it and generally prefers to suffer in silence so that people don't make a fuss out of it. she had a tutor throughout middle school and towards the end of high school, as her ability to focus on schoolwork and get it done had worsened due to her insistence on it up and continuing with strategies that clearly don't work. at times words can fly right off her head, and in certain situations requiring one to sit still she can be very restless (see habits for specifics).
- she has a black cat back at her parents' named caviar (캐비어 kaebieo), named after her favourite villager from animal crossing (her name is kiki in the localised ac). she hasn't seen caviar since she left tongyeong, and hayeon misses her dearly.
- hayeon brought all of her barbie dvds with her to daegu. she watches them when she's stressed out, or even when she just feels like it. jaehwan has seen princess and the pauper too many times and will often hum the songs at work, taunting hayeon to join along (it's tempting, but she cannot be caught singing 'the cat's meow' by her co-workers a second time). despite that, diamond castle is unsurprisingly her favourite. two cottagecore girlfriends venturing out to find a diamond castle along with their twin himbo best friends? what else could she need?
- she has a black cat back at her parents' named caviar (캐비어 kaebieo), named after her favourite villager from animal crossing (her name is kiki in the localised ac). she hasn't seen caviar since she left tongyeong, and hayeon misses her dearly.
- hayeon brought all of her barbie dvds with her to daegu. she watches them when she's stressed out, or even when she just feels like it. jaehwan has seen princess and the pauper too many times and will often hum the songs at work, taunting hayeon to join along (it's tempting, but she cannot be caught singing 'the cat's meow' by her co-workers a second time). despite that, diamond castle is unsurprisingly her favourite. two cottagecore girlfriends venturing out to find a diamond castle along with their twin himbo best friends? what else could she need?
the relationships
seo jaehwan. co-worker, close friend. 23.
upon starting work at the pizza parlour, seo jaehwan had been hayeon's designated go-to person whenever she was unsure of what to do, given her lack of experience. hayeon stayed out of his way, not intending to force her presence onto people any longer, perfectly content with working alone. unfortunately, she wasn't very good at hiding her ineptitiude, and so jaehwan had helped her out despite her stubborn refusal. "that pride won't do you well as a rookie, hayeon-ah," he'd said with a boisterous laugh, showing hayeon a much more efficient way to do her duties. sure, this event had scratched her ego and nonchalant act quite a bit, but he was right; with some guidance, she managed to keep her job.
even as she became accustomed to work and was much less reliant on his help, he remained friendly, and was often the first to greet hayeon as she trudged groggily into the kitchen. jaehwan sticks around though no one really obliges him to - maybe that's how he managed to crawl his way into a friendship with hayeon. jaehwan can be honest to a fault — the result of an underdeveloped thought filter and general tactlessness that you'd often associate with kids — the kind of confrontational that hayeon could never (and does not wish to) be, but oftentimes the things he says are what some would shy away from mentioning, but what others need to hear. as these kind of friends do, hayeon and jaehwan balance each other out; with jaehwan gently nudging hayeon towards relying on her instincts rather than overthinking her way out of opportunities, and in turn, hayeon tugging him away from making stupid decisions because he feels like thinking things through is 'ruining the momentum'.
hayeon and jaehwan hardly see each other outside the workplace these days because of hayeon being stressed and busy, and there is a slight strain due to jaehwan essentially being competition to keep the job. however, jaehwan is the one to inform hayeon of junghee's accident (elaborate in interview), and because he's a great friend, he also convinces their manager to let her take the week off without automatically losing her job. hayeon is grateful to have him as a pillar of support in such a horrible time, and they keep in contact through messages and phone calls as she reaches tongyeong.
even as she became accustomed to work and was much less reliant on his help, he remained friendly, and was often the first to greet hayeon as she trudged groggily into the kitchen. jaehwan sticks around though no one really obliges him to - maybe that's how he managed to crawl his way into a friendship with hayeon. jaehwan can be honest to a fault — the result of an underdeveloped thought filter and general tactlessness that you'd often associate with kids — the kind of confrontational that hayeon could never (and does not wish to) be, but oftentimes the things he says are what some would shy away from mentioning, but what others need to hear. as these kind of friends do, hayeon and jaehwan balance each other out; with jaehwan gently nudging hayeon towards relying on her instincts rather than overthinking her way out of opportunities, and in turn, hayeon tugging him away from making stupid decisions because he feels like thinking things through is 'ruining the momentum'.
hayeon and jaehwan hardly see each other outside the workplace these days because of hayeon being stressed and busy, and there is a slight strain due to jaehwan essentially being competition to keep the job. however, jaehwan is the one to inform hayeon of junghee's accident (elaborate in interview), and because he's a great friend, he also convinces their manager to let her take the week off without automatically losing her job. hayeon is grateful to have him as a pillar of support in such a horrible time, and they keep in contact through messages and phone calls as she reaches tongyeong.
jeong eunwoo + park yeonji. parents. 44 and 43.
parental expectations can weigh you down like an anchor.
lee junghee. close friend, unrequited crush. 22.
for the longest time, hayeon considered junghee her only true friend - and that was fine, because she hadn't been intending on getting any in the first place. if she had it her way, hayeon would've kept to herself throughout school, never getting to know people past the mandatory levels (aka, how well they work in a group project.) and yet... junghee seemed to care in a way that no one else really has. she didn't gush excitedly over mrs kim's drawling lessons because she was told she should befriend the quiet jeong. hayeon felt the sincerity when junghee said she wanted to be friends within the first week of middle school, and so, miss sunshine eased her way around hayeon's crumbling walls, taking her icy hands and giving them warmth; a snug-fitting pair of gloves.
by high school, hayeon becomes aware of the feelings she's always had for junghee; the same ones that surrounded her unknowingly since seventh grade. around this time hayeon also becomes more distant, a result of her spiraling emotional stability and her avoiding junghee before her feelings for her would became too evident. hayeon's feelings are a complex mix of her wanting and admiring the freedom and happiness junghee seemed to have so effortlessly, yet quietly resenting her for that very reason... but also half-consciously adjusting her life to align with junghee's; the way she does with the people she cares about. it's like... hayeon wants to be like junghee, and she wants the girl to hold her hand as she learns all the same. she yearns for junghee's warmth in a way that's too greedy, in all honesty - she wants it, she wants her all to herself, but she knows junghee has too much love to give. she just could never feel the same way.
she doesn't get over these feelings, at least not entirely, and if anything they made a bit more sense after graduation - it's weird without junghee around, and there's this longing for her to be there now that neither of them are required to hang out. in her eyes, junghee only cares for her out of obligation, and the sporadic intervals between her efforts to keep in contact post-graduation are proof of this. hayeon misses her, but the good-natured texts are out of politeness, clearly. junghee doesn't miss her the way hayeon does. so she avoids engaging in said efforts as much as possible.
kim muyeol. friend? 21.
people like muyeol aren't people that hayeon can stand to be around. his personality is too big for her - too commanding. something about his efforts to include her felt obligatory, and because muyeol is a charmer, hayeon had told herself that this niceness was an act. she knows deep down that she shouldn't be so harsh on someone who's trying to do good for her... but she just can't bring herself to trust him fully. after highschool he is one of those who try to stay in touch, but hayeon is trying to cut them off, so she ignores these efforts, dismissing them as polite niceties. or something. frankly, hayeon thinks he's an , especially with the way he informed her of junghee's accident (though who could blame him?) with a bit of time spent together and some character growth on hayeon's side mainly, they could be good for each other, and while hayeon isn't the best at comforting, she has surprisingly solid and grounded advice.
heo raon. friend?? 22.
hayeon always saw raon as the kind of person she could have been, but ultimately can't. both were on the more distant side of the group, and yet raon seemed to get on with everyone in her own ways, whilst hayeon had contented herself with being a mere presence that slowly drifted away. hayeon could only wish to have such an ambition that she would fight for, and so she admires raon greatly with her decision to pursue art against her parents' wishes. it frustrates hayeon just how much better raon is, and she wishes she tried to get closer to raon, because no matter how much she wanted to be better than her, she could never hate heo raon. the girl's presence had become a source of comfort in high school - her silence mirroring hayeon's, and yet, it was different. raon seems so sure of what she wants and hayeon is not (was she ever?) they were never too close, so naturally interactions after high school were almost non-existent, especially with hayeon practically cutting everyone off. raon visits her mind a bit more than others though, almost as much as junghee.... hm.
(maybe the things about raon she wanted to have were actually things she had subconsciously found attractive about her? but hayeon was too caught up in her feelings for junghee?? :^))
the daily life
occupation. college senior at daegu university - major in computer science.
daily schedule.
a day in the life: jeong hayeon.
she often wakes up at her desk, an impending backache and keyboard marks on her face already rearing their ugly heads.
loading... tldr she kind of drifts off throughout the day. lectures in the morning, work in the afternoon, coding at night. stays at home when she's not in uni or work most of the time. jaehwan's house is also an occasional spot.
loading... tldr she kind of drifts off throughout the day. lectures in the morning, work in the afternoon, coding at night. stays at home when she's not in uni or work most of the time. jaehwan's house is also an occasional spot.
struggles.
; unsure about her current life and what's driving her to do all this. does she really want to keep rotting away lifelessly in daegu... does she like it here? what is she doing. is it all for herself or solely for the sake of not being the cookie cutter daughter any longer?
; she's so jealous, so ing jealous of all these guys who left tongyeong because they wanted to, not because it was what no one would think she'd ever do... her friends always seemed so much better, so much more stable than she'll ever be. she's put them on a high pedestal and is too blinded to see they're struggling just as she is. also... she's been ignoring their attempts to reach out for a while now. so are they still reallly her friends? were they ever?
; the pizza business isn't going very well - business has been slower, which means less pay to distribute, and they're probably cutting off some staff, and it's not like she's that valuable, and now she has to compete with her best friend to keep the job she's grown used to or risk becoming reliant on her parents again as she tries to find another decent-paying job.
; she just wants to bring junghee back... junghee passing so suddenly hits her like a huge boulder. god, why didn't she get her closure before it was too late? just a simple confession... now the weight in her chest couldn't possibly go away.
; oh god. and her parents don't even know she's a lesbian and whenever they ask if she has a boyfriend it stings. she's confident in her uality now than she was in high school and she isn't going to hide it... and yet... what would her parents think?
; really just needs to open up but has no mf clue where to begin. she slips to jaehwan sometimes, but these are things hayeon herself does not understand fully, so other than offering support jaehwan can't do much either. as the days pass by, hayeon's facade of stoicism cracks and the friends will finally see her at her worst... she needs to learn that this is okay.
; she's so jealous, so ing jealous of all these guys who left tongyeong because they wanted to, not because it was what no one would think she'd ever do... her friends always seemed so much better, so much more stable than she'll ever be. she's put them on a high pedestal and is too blinded to see they're struggling just as she is. also... she's been ignoring their attempts to reach out for a while now. so are they still reallly her friends? were they ever?
; the pizza business isn't going very well - business has been slower, which means less pay to distribute, and they're probably cutting off some staff, and it's not like she's that valuable, and now she has to compete with her best friend to keep the job she's grown used to or risk becoming reliant on her parents again as she tries to find another decent-paying job.
; she just wants to bring junghee back... junghee passing so suddenly hits her like a huge boulder. god, why didn't she get her closure before it was too late? just a simple confession... now the weight in her chest couldn't possibly go away.
; oh god. and her parents don't even know she's a lesbian and whenever they ask if she has a boyfriend it stings. she's confident in her uality now than she was in high school and she isn't going to hide it... and yet... what would her parents think?
; really just needs to open up but has no mf clue where to begin. she slips to jaehwan sometimes, but these are things hayeon herself does not understand fully, so other than offering support jaehwan can't do much either. as the days pass by, hayeon's facade of stoicism cracks and the friends will finally see her at her worst... she needs to learn that this is okay.
the lover
??
--
Someone from the friend group? or no one at all-.
nicknames.
heredate of birth & age. month day, year || ??
place of birth. here
hometown. here
nationality. here
ethnicity. here
occupation. here
personality.
does not need to be as indept as your character's.
does not need to be as indept as your character's.
background.
does not need to be as detailed as your character's just highlight key points in their background.
does not need to be as detailed as your character's just highlight key points in their background.
current relationship status. friends? crushing? dating? etc.
their love story. how did they meet? how has their relationship developed or will develope? what are their interactions?
ending. will they end up together? break up? get engaged? what outcome do you want for them?
trivia.
- here
- here
- here
- here
the interview
atmosphere: a deafening silence, an empty room with white walls, hayeon trying to keep her voice as level and emotionless as she could.
are you ready to return to tongyeong? why or why not?
"i'm sure my parents wanted to see me." she averts her gaze, avoiding the question. "given the circumstances, it's not gonna be a happy reunion, but... i haven't visited. not since i left, " she sighs, "they'd want me to come back." she brings a hand up to , catches herself, and puts it back down. "yes, it'll be... it'll be fine. i can stay a few days with them, with everyone. it's the least i could do. for junghee."
did you keep in contact with any of your friends in the group? if yes, who did you keep in contact with? if no, why didn't you keep in contact with your friends?
did you keep in contact with any of your friends in the group? if yes, who did you keep in contact with? if no, why didn't you keep in contact with your friends?
she laughs; it's a bitter sound. "no, i guess not? i like their birthday greetings and happy new year messages on instagram." hayeon smiles, but her nails are digging into the skin of her thighs. "e- even if they're probably automated messages from, i don't know... holiday bots. or something." why the hell would she reach out to the very people she was trying to get away from?
what were you doing when you received the news that junghee passed?
there's a short pause. then, a grimace, which is probably the most straightforward expression that hayeon has made throughout this... interview of sorts. "working." she looks up at the ceiling, her fists clutching her shirt. "i was working, and ing jaehwan knew before i did," she raises her voice just a bit. her tone is steady, but wavering, "that ... muyeol was the one tasked with telling me, i guess. i never read his messages. he's just saving face, but he doesn't give a , doesn't he?" she shakes her head, lips curling up into a spiteful grin, "whatever. he figured i wouldn't open a notification with the words 'junghee' and 'dead' , i guess, so jaehwan found out through him. then jae told me." what she doesn't say: he somehow went to jaehwan's account and dm-ed him instead. what a ty guy. jaehwan had to wait for my shift to end — two hours after his! — to tell me that there's been an accident with a person called junghee, whom i never really mentioned, and she didn't make it. and who was this muyeol guy? seems important. gosh, she understands if it were anyone else, but junghee......
is there anything you wish you would have told junghee before she died?
"nothing." she answers too fast. her smile is too big, her body too stiff. hayeon stays like that for a while, but falters. she finally lets a tear fall down. "i..... i never told her." she wipes her face with the back of her hand, looking down at her lap. "i didn't tell her a lot of things." i love you. "if she were here... she'd at least... maybe...." you couldn't hate me even after everything, right....?
what is your favorite memory with junghee?
"our first year in middle school..." it was special. somehow, hayeon knew junghee best when they were sharing a wooden desk with books sprawled across them. "the entire year. especially when i... when i started talking to her. like, really talking. she was.... she looked so...." nights watching fireworks and getting dragged into adventure camps could never compare.
what would you say is your way of coping with stressful and emotional situations?
" you mean how i get through college? " she chuckles, the joke half-meant, "i don't know. i it up. keep all that to myself and wallow in the pool." it's the only way she knows how. "sometimes i drink. play animal crossing. whatever. it's not like it ever goes away."
is there anything you'd like to tell your friends?
"thanks, i guess." she seems like she's not really there, at least mentally. she's looking back at the time she spent with her friends, back in middle and high school . "thanks for having me. putting up with the little ghost in the corner." a sad smile. "the ... hospitality was cool, i guess."
if you were asked to stay a few more days, maybe even a week for your friends, would you be willing to stay?
she raises an eyebrow. "... for my parents, maybe. or my cat. i miss her." what else is there to stay for? "i'm here for a funeral. i should just pay my respects and move along." although she's a little curious how everyone is doing, someone who got their invitation secondhand probably isn't welcome in the core circle's grand reunion.
final goodbyes
comments/questions/suggestions.
; well i am so sorry this took so long but here is my girl... the angst may not show it but i love her dearly. i took more of her from myself than i would like to admit
; i hardly have the brainpower to finish this i literally came up with her negative traits and struggles then realised oh i have to write nice things about her too.... uh.. so i rlly struggled in that aspect
; i'm so sorry for how ugly and plain this app is i hardly have the energy to type this all out....
; LMAO im so indecisive w the love interest i ultimately decided to just leave it blank....... however i do have spicy ideas involving one heo raon so i'll put them in the rs section and u can do what u please w it :p
; well i am so sorry this took so long but here is my girl... the angst may not show it but i love her dearly. i took more of her from myself than i would like to admit
; i hardly have the brainpower to finish this i literally came up with her negative traits and struggles then realised oh i have to write nice things about her too.... uh.. so i rlly struggled in that aspect
; i'm so sorry for how ugly and plain this app is i hardly have the energy to type this all out....
; LMAO im so indecisive w the love interest i ultimately decided to just leave it blank....... however i do have spicy ideas involving one heo raon so i'll put them in the rs section and u can do what u please w it :p
scene requests.
; the gang telling their favourite stories about junghee and just going silent at the end. "i miss her..." "don't we all?"
; someone.. maybe muyeol having an outburst at hayeon, tired of her blaming everyone for her pity party - "we did care about you, you know?!?! and it's... it hurts that you can't see that... what kind of people do you think we are?"
; recreating/revisiting one of their childhood hangouts and you can just feel the nostalgia that everyone has
; the gang telling their favourite stories about junghee and just going silent at the end. "i miss her..." "don't we all?"
; someone.. maybe muyeol having an outburst at hayeon, tired of her blaming everyone for her pity party - "we did care about you, you know?!?! and it's... it hurts that you can't see that... what kind of people do you think we are?"
; recreating/revisiting one of their childhood hangouts and you can just feel the nostalgia that everyone has
; hayeon very awkwardly whispering a confession to junghee's casket(with the encouragement of someone??) and feeling lighter afterwards
password. "remember when junghee planned my birthday party for me and you were all so eager to make it work... fixing all the holes in her plans and taking charge when she couldn't... yeah. i don't know if you guys were doing that for me or for her. but i had a good time. thank you."
name
jeong, hayeon
d.o.b
august 28th, 1998
age
21
ethnicity
korean
height
163cms
weight
55kgs
jang yeeun ↪
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