Thanks to LiNiLalisa1502 for inspiring me to do this.

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Life has gotten me thinking.

What is my purpose in life? I’m pretty much lost, I don’t really know if I’m making the right choices. I’ve grown up to the idea of having a financial stable future is always the way, which I agree but what choices have I been making that is taking me to that path? And is it worth it if I don’t actully enjoy my career? 

Im in an insurance business with my parents. And I got my business license a few months ago. The pressure for me is pretty high since I am the youngest in the business, I’m 20 year old. I joined when I was 19. It s a great a business, don’t get me wrong but it’s just not easy. 

My aunts and uncles told me to become a nurse, I know, typical asian choices. I was about to but I honestly wasn’t feeling it.  They made it seem like you’re not going to have a good future if you don’t go to college. I absolutely don’t agree with that. It really depends on the major you really want. So for a while, yes I was about to go to school to become a nurse but I just never felt it. So I spoke to my dad and said that I don’t want to anymore and I want  to go to school for programming in computer science and he was all for it. 

I am grateful to have supportive parents but the things is I don’t even know if I want pursue that but it’s already too late, I’m going to school for that on February, wish me luck I guess. 

The one thing I’m very passionate about is filmmaking. I have directed three films already and I have all the equipment I need to make a film and I feel so many emotions when I film and create stories. I really enjoy directing the films, it just feels right but sometimes I feel like I’m not being realistic in my life. Maybe when I have a good job in the future and have enough money, maybe I’ll be able to pursue it when I’m stable? Who knows?

i guess I just needed to talk about this here because, well, who else can I talk about this to?

anywayyyy that’s my life! Wish me luck!!