I feel like I'm a Ghost Rider now...

You know, that Ghost Rider was an angel, The Spirit of Justice, Zarathos. God created and sent him to protect the innocent on Earth, but... he was tricked and captured by demons.

He brought down to Hell, he was corrupted and tortured until he went insane. He originally had mission to protect the innocent, but after everything that happened to him in Hell, his mission changed to be to punish the guilty. He became the Spirit of Vengeance.

And I'm now like that... even though I really really don't want to do it and never have any intention to do it, but I end up hurting people who had hurted me before like I'm searching for something or curious of something that I don't even know what I'm searching for or what I'm curious of.... ㅠㅠ I don't want to be like this... but again, everytime I tried to fix everything with them... it always failed...

I thought, maybe I shouldn't have tried anymore that I should let go of the past, even though it's so hard because we have a lot of beautiful things too which ever happened to us that now become beautiful memories for me~ But, I don't want to hurt them anymore and I also don't want them to hurt me again, so I will try so hard to let go of my past and completely move on... because I realize now that I think they don't have any intention to fix our friendship... perhaps it's only me who still think that we can become as we used to be... I'm tired now and I give up.

One thing for sure, I really hope I can be back to my old self, a very positive and optimistic girl~ because after Zarathos was freed from Hell's corruption, he finally returned to his true, angelic form~♡

p.s. I just want to point out that everything that is originally good will become good too in the end, just like Zarathos who in the end become an angel again and I want to be like him, to be my precious self again~ ♡^-^♡