Black.. was all what I saw..
Cold, scared and lonely were all what I felt..
Nothing can make me feel better, nothing can make me return to what I was before..
I felt like I lost everything, I tried to look for any light of hope, anything that can help me walk down that black pitch road, but to no avail..
you were there holding my hand but not anymore..
 your heart was my safe warm place but guess had to leave it too to become homeless again, but this time no home i would find warmer, no place i can call mine nor feel i belong to it anymore..
I promised you I will fight everyone and everything for us, sorry I disapointed you and let go when I found out that nothing I could do when it’s us who should I fight now..
I promised you I won’t stop loving you, I didn’t and I won’t but sometimes loving someone means you should let go of them when keeping them hurts them more.
you left and was brave enough to Make decision that it’s good to not hurt each others more, it’s like killing someone who is suffering so he won’t suffer anymore but isn’t suffering but staying alive and stealing moments of happiness better than losing every chance on being happy.
You said you would be strong so I can move on, sorry to disapoint you I can’t move on… how can when you are a part of mind, heart and soul.
I promised to be friends if you just stayed and I can talk to you and see you, it’s better than losing you forever yes but do you know I even call you by your name, hell Idon’t even know what to call you whenI’m used to call you baby and all sweet names.
I promised myself I won’t make you feel bad or make you know how much I feel sad, even not tell you how much i feel broken when i talk to you and feel broken, or how much I miss you even when you are in front of me I feel you so far away and I feel so distant.. so I won’t I will carry my broken pieces away and act fine and moving on so you can feel like that too, maybe watching you getting over me will make me feel happy ? At least I would know you are living well.
Writing down my feelings to you makes all my wounds open up again, but.. maybe pain would make me feel I’m still alive this way I will keep looking for a better tomorrow ? Or just live with our past memories graved deep in my heart while living souless, faking smiles and focing happiness to take over me so I help you move on too.

A letter to not be read

A story that should never be shared

To brokenheart that should had never happen

From Mark to kookie that would never stay together..