It's still 17 here, in Indonesia, but it's past 15 there, in Korea.

I can't, even in my fantasy, imagine the real moment of their birthday. Jung Eunji and Kwon Jiyong. It seems something I would never be able to taste. But still, always, I wish them the great year ahead, always be healthy, and full of love.

Since I knew Jung Eunji, I'd learnt what the meaning of having a muse in life. And Jung Eunji is my muse. Seeing her smile on my phone always affects my day. It makes me smile, sounds fake, but it's true. As a person, she maybe is not perfect, but in her I see the person I want to be, the person I want to grow into. 

And Kwon Jiyong. I don't know, honestly. Daesung is always my favorite member of Bigbang. But there is something in Kwon Jiyong which I still am not sure even until now. Something about him that put me in my own theory of how perfect he is as a character, of how I always have him to put on my story, of how everything I seek as a story hero always stand on him. 

Yes. While Eunji affects me in real life, Jiyong supports me as a writer. And this what makes me love them almost equally.

While most of you have already known how I fell for Jung Eunji, it's maybe the first time you learn what I see in Kwon Jiyong. It's maybe true that I often put aside Kwon Jiyong as himself, I would prefer the perfect hero in my head where he's that particular man with many flaws, yet always has something within him that's not free for everyone to see. And I want to keep it that way.

When I see their pictures, I always want to grab my laptop and write, I want to put everything inside my head into words. And I really want to show it to people no matter what they thought about me. But of course, putting everything in English is not as easy as I want it to be. I am still a learner. Thus, I wish, I'll get better, much better time after time. 

This is their birthday and I want to do something that makes me remember today, 2017. My stories haven't finished yet, but I want to do something. That's why I decide to write this blog, to share my thought of them. I might sound ridiculous at some point but I believe being bluesjuice in this world gives me enough reason to be as sane as I am.

So, for you who support me, support them, I'm coming with their story. It takes time, of course, but I will come back, I wish it'll be soon.

Then, see you again, soon.

With love,

blues.