ㅤ¿ㅤTHIS IS NGSY'S VOCALIST, KAEDEN AHN
kaeden.VSCO.CO
STEP ONE.
full name. ahn kaeden
other name/s.
AHN KYUNGJOON korean name and also legally recognised alias, tends to only be used by those who have difficulty pronouncing his name, kaeden.
KADE name-shortening of his name and will serve as his stage name.
MR. VALENTINE a horribly cheesy nickname as a result of his birthday falling on the 14th of february as well as his love for fanservice and wooing fans.
NOISEMAKER perhaps a con of being a vocalist is the fact that his large lungs have lead him to becoming quite the blabbermouth. junwi has taken to calling him this as a result.
PRETTY BOY kade knows he looks good and makes sure he looks good. as a result of his efforts, he's been on the receiving end of this nickname enough times to find it commonplace, but maybe hearing it come from a certain creative director will ruffle his feathers again.
KADE name-shortening of his name and will serve as his stage name.
MR. VALENTINE a horribly cheesy nickname as a result of his birthday falling on the 14th of february as well as his love for fanservice and wooing fans.
NOISEMAKER perhaps a con of being a vocalist is the fact that his large lungs have lead him to becoming quite the blabbermouth. junwi has taken to calling him this as a result.
PRETTY BOY kade knows he looks good and makes sure he looks good. as a result of his efforts, he's been on the receiving end of this nickname enough times to find it commonplace, but maybe hearing it come from a certain creative director will ruffle his feathers again.
date of birth. 14/02/1993 + 23
birthplace. los angeles, california
hometown. seoul, south korea
ethnicity. korean
nationality. korean-american
languages.
FLUENT KOREAN take two rather patriotic korean immigrants and their son born and raised in a foreign country and you get them making sure he knows his native language.
NATIVE ENGLISH born and raised in los angeles for the greater portion of his life, he speaks his english with much more confidence than most koreans.
NATIVE ENGLISH born and raised in los angeles for the greater portion of his life, he speaks his english with much more confidence than most koreans.
ORIENTATION. demipanual & panromantic
PRONOUNS. he/him
STEP FOUR.
stage name. kade (케이드)
position. vocalist
backup pos. guitarist, pr manager/publicist?? aha
# experience.
VOICE · 15 years, ages 6 - 20 ('99-'13)
· formal learning
· only stopped because of ngsy activities
GUITAR · 7 years, ages 10 - 17 ('03 - '10)
· inconsistent, never really wanted to take it up but did for the sake of his church choir
· at most, remembers all the chords and strumming techniques as well as plucking. has a bit of difficulty playing a song fluidly without pausing even if he's reading sheet music.
· formal learning
· only stopped because of ngsy activities
GUITAR · 7 years, ages 10 - 17 ('03 - '10)
· inconsistent, never really wanted to take it up but did for the sake of his church choir
· at most, remembers all the chords and strumming techniques as well as plucking. has a bit of difficulty playing a song fluidly without pausing even if he's reading sheet music.
resumé.
CHURCH CHOIR · 6 years, ages 7 - 13 ('00 - '06)
BAND · 1.5 years, ages 17 - 18 ('10 - '11)
· vocalist of 6pence
· left due to conflict of interest between him and the other members (kaeden felt that he would never advance in terms of his music career if he stayed; friction between members due to contrasting personalities)
COMPETITIONS · 12 years, ages 8 - 18 ('01 - '11)
· on & off
· always placed within the top 3, has won first place a handful of times
YOUTUBE · 4 years, ages 15 - 19 ('08 -12)
· had been posting prior to these years, however from 2010 to 2013 he had finally gotten serious
· was partly how junwi discovered him
KOREAN SINGING CONTEST · age 19 ('12)
· entered a singing contest in korea, won first place
· was supposed to be signed to a label but some circumstances caused it not to push through
· his not being signed was also why he jumped at the chance of joining ngsy
BAND · 1.5 years, ages 17 - 18 ('10 - '11)
· vocalist of 6pence
· left due to conflict of interest between him and the other members (kaeden felt that he would never advance in terms of his music career if he stayed; friction between members due to contrasting personalities)
COMPETITIONS · 12 years, ages 8 - 18 ('01 - '11)
· on & off
· always placed within the top 3, has won first place a handful of times
YOUTUBE · 4 years, ages 15 - 19 ('08 -12)
· had been posting prior to these years, however from 2010 to 2013 he had finally gotten serious
· was partly how junwi discovered him
KOREAN SINGING CONTEST · age 19 ('12)
· entered a singing contest in korea, won first place
· was supposed to be signed to a label but some circumstances caused it not to push through
· his not being signed was also why he jumped at the chance of joining ngsy
JW: what made you decide to join ngsy?
kd:"fame." junwi's met with his signature chesire grin, and he can't help but shake his head. "what? i mean, sure there's passion and all that but... fame. glory. the fans screams pounding into my eardrums alongside the bass." he sighs almost dreamily, "ah... doesn't that look like a wonderful image? having everyone know your name? seeing your face on huge billboards as you drive through the city or hi-way?" he pauses for a second to take a peek at junwi, giving him a quick once over before sighing at the lack of reaction. "well, if it isn't a thrill for you, it certainly was for me. which is why i'm here now, y'know? and well... i wanted to be able to sing for a crowd."
kd:"fame." junwi's met with his signature chesire grin, and he can't help but shake his head. "what? i mean, sure there's passion and all that but... fame. glory. the fans screams pounding into my eardrums alongside the bass." he sighs almost dreamily, "ah... doesn't that look like a wonderful image? having everyone know your name? seeing your face on huge billboards as you drive through the city or hi-way?" he pauses for a second to take a peek at junwi, giving him a quick once over before sighing at the lack of reaction. "well, if it isn't a thrill for you, it certainly was for me. which is why i'm here now, y'know? and well... i wanted to be able to sing for a crowd."
jw: hm, what do you think of your skills? what makes you better than the rest? what can you offer ngsy?
kd:"i've been singing since like... i left my mother's womb." he frowns a little, "if anything i'm like, the best candidate you had out of all the others you met." he leans forward, causing junwi to move back to regain the lost personal space. "i mean, you probably heard my voice and snapped your fingers and said 'that's him, that's our guy'." he giggles, shoulders shaking as he falls back into his seat. "but seriously though, i'm a wonderful singer. tons of experience too, meaning i know how to stand on a stage and work a crowd."
for a moment kaeden stops bouncing so much in his chair to stare directly at junwi. "the vocals are pretty much the face of the group, right? yeah well, that just means you're gonna need someone who can grab people's attention right off the bat. charisma? i got that too, don't you worry your pretty little about interviews, kade-y's got you covered." pausing, he rubs his chin in mock contemplation "although... i guess we do have to talk about what's okay to say and what should never leave my mouth. oh! and plus..." a wink. "i've got the looks to match, don't you think?" he giggles again, before suddenly pausing. "y'know you're pretty funny junwi. isn't a little too late to be asking me this now? besides, you were the one who asked me to come remember?" the other merely sighs and mumbles how he wish he didn't. but the small smile that appears on his face lets kaeden know how much of it was just a joke.
kd:"i've been singing since like... i left my mother's womb." he frowns a little, "if anything i'm like, the best candidate you had out of all the others you met." he leans forward, causing junwi to move back to regain the lost personal space. "i mean, you probably heard my voice and snapped your fingers and said 'that's him, that's our guy'." he giggles, shoulders shaking as he falls back into his seat. "but seriously though, i'm a wonderful singer. tons of experience too, meaning i know how to stand on a stage and work a crowd."
for a moment kaeden stops bouncing so much in his chair to stare directly at junwi. "the vocals are pretty much the face of the group, right? yeah well, that just means you're gonna need someone who can grab people's attention right off the bat. charisma? i got that too, don't you worry your pretty little about interviews, kade-y's got you covered." pausing, he rubs his chin in mock contemplation "although... i guess we do have to talk about what's okay to say and what should never leave my mouth. oh! and plus..." a wink. "i've got the looks to match, don't you think?" he giggles again, before suddenly pausing. "y'know you're pretty funny junwi. isn't a little too late to be asking me this now? besides, you were the one who asked me to come remember?" the other merely sighs and mumbles how he wish he didn't. but the small smile that appears on his face lets kaeden know how much of it was just a joke.
jw: (sighs) as you know, we debuted three years ago. how has the journey been? what has happened so far? do you see it as a good or bad experience?
KD: kaeden smiles, one that's a little less to please and more to show that he is pleased. "it's been rocky, sure. but we've come farther than what most of us thought. it's been a fun ride, and i would say it was a good experience. a really good one." he lets out a soft sigh, "sure... there were moments where there was tension. i mean, we're all human we tend to have off days. but i feel as if it all came well together in the end."
KD: kaeden smiles, one that's a little less to please and more to show that he is pleased. "it's been rocky, sure. but we've come farther than what most of us thought. it's been a fun ride, and i would say it was a good experience. a really good one." he lets out a soft sigh, "sure... there were moments where there was tension. i mean, we're all human we tend to have off days. but i feel as if it all came well together in the end."
jw: alright, (frowns) well i didn't plan this question... but if today i gave you the choice to leave ngsy, would you take it?
KD: the question has him tensing up and freezing, worry at the thought that junwi wasn't actually going to give him a choice and this was just his way of letting him down gently. the elder seems to notice, so he quickly clarifies.
almost instantly kaeden deflates in relief. "you had me worried there for a second junwi. but... no. i wouldn't take it. we've come a long way and i always saw ngsy as my one shot to the top of the food chain. of course, that's not all i see it as. it's family now," the mention of family has kaeden's eyes softening and junwi tries not to notice, "it seems a little harsh to just leave family, don't you think?" he laughs, but it seems almost bittersweet. junwi tries to ignore the reason why.
"besides," kaeden starts off exaggeratedly, "there's no one who could replace me as ngsy's vocalist. they'd have pretty big shoes to fill in, don'tcha think?"
KD: the question has him tensing up and freezing, worry at the thought that junwi wasn't actually going to give him a choice and this was just his way of letting him down gently. the elder seems to notice, so he quickly clarifies.
almost instantly kaeden deflates in relief. "you had me worried there for a second junwi. but... no. i wouldn't take it. we've come a long way and i always saw ngsy as my one shot to the top of the food chain. of course, that's not all i see it as. it's family now," the mention of family has kaeden's eyes softening and junwi tries not to notice, "it seems a little harsh to just leave family, don't you think?" he laughs, but it seems almost bittersweet. junwi tries to ignore the reason why.
"besides," kaeden starts off exaggeratedly, "there's no one who could replace me as ngsy's vocalist. they'd have pretty big shoes to fill in, don'tcha think?"
jw: what do you wish for in the next year?
KD: "hm... that's a good question." he hums softly as he thinks, lips pursing as his gaze focuses elsewhere. "oh!" he snaps his fingers. "well, firstly i'd like us to release a full album, with maybe... 12 songs?" he giggles, "think you can handle that junie? anyway, what else... ah! a concert? or wait, think bigger, a world tour. it'd be fun to go perform at tokyo dome or like in new york. something big and eye-catching." he tilts his head a little to the side, "a thought just came to me. if i can, i'd love to participate in producing one of our songs this year. i never quite got to before, but because of uni and all i've actually had to learn it and i've been improving in my own time. i think it'd be nice to contribute, even if it's just in the composing or lyric writing. makes it feel more... intimate i suppose." he looks at junwi straight in the eyes, a small mischievous grin on his face, "think you're up for having more of me in your studio?" he laughs at the faux look of despair that crosses.
KD: "hm... that's a good question." he hums softly as he thinks, lips pursing as his gaze focuses elsewhere. "oh!" he snaps his fingers. "well, firstly i'd like us to release a full album, with maybe... 12 songs?" he giggles, "think you can handle that junie? anyway, what else... ah! a concert? or wait, think bigger, a world tour. it'd be fun to go perform at tokyo dome or like in new york. something big and eye-catching." he tilts his head a little to the side, "a thought just came to me. if i can, i'd love to participate in producing one of our songs this year. i never quite got to before, but because of uni and all i've actually had to learn it and i've been improving in my own time. i think it'd be nice to contribute, even if it's just in the composing or lyric writing. makes it feel more... intimate i suppose." he looks at junwi straight in the eyes, a small mischievous grin on his face, "think you're up for having more of me in your studio?" he laughs at the faux look of despair that crosses.
jw: interesting. last question, are you close to any of the members?
KD: "sure i am. 3 years together with my personality, i'd be more surprised if i didn't get along with at least 1 person. our manager's probably my favourite though, plus i like trying to help her out with the pr stuff and just, getting our name out there. besides, she's always making me do the interviews." he rolls his eyes in fake annoyance but quickly reverts to laughter. then he eyes junwi, an almost knowing expression on his face. "aw, don't think i forgot about you junie, i'm pretty close to you too aren't i?" he hopes.
KD: "sure i am. 3 years together with my personality, i'd be more surprised if i didn't get along with at least 1 person. our manager's probably my favourite though, plus i like trying to help her out with the pr stuff and just, getting our name out there. besides, she's always making me do the interviews." he rolls his eyes in fake annoyance but quickly reverts to laughter. then he eyes junwi, an almost knowing expression on his face. "aw, don't think i forgot about you junie, i'm pretty close to you too aren't i?" he hopes.
STEP THREE.
personality.
AQUARIUS · ESFP · HUFFLEPUFF · THE LOVER ·
THE BONVIVANT
ostentatious passionate verbose visionary overbearing
acquisitive insecure uninhibited candid approachable
flirtatious fidgety silver-tongued charming sensitive
TRADE YOUR PASSION FOR GLORY · SELL OUT ·
'WELL DONE SON!' GUY · STEPFORD SMILER
THE BONVIVANT
ostentatious passionate verbose visionary overbearing
acquisitive insecure uninhibited candid approachable
flirtatious fidgety silver-tongued charming sensitive
TRADE YOUR PASSION FOR GLORY · SELL OUT ·
'WELL DONE SON!' GUY · STEPFORD SMILER
YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN CONTENT TO DESTROY YOURSELF,
SO OTHERS WOULD NEVER HAVE THE CHANCE.
AFTER ALL, IT IS FAR EASIER TO BURN A HOUSE DOWN,
THAN TO GROW COMFORTABLE LIVING IN IT.
your heart is an arsonist, building bridges so you have something to burn | m.a.w
he speaks and sees in vivid color yet something about him seems so unmistakably blue. gray even. yet he hinds behind such technicolor dreams that it's so hard to see how plainly black and white he can be.
seeking recognition amidst the fame and glory, it's hard to tell if what he wants to become is a legend. or to be wanted. (needed. loved.) because along the way, it's easy to lose track of your roots when a dandelion stands stronger against the wind than you.
but what he does know and what he does see, is weakness, plain as can be. in a world where everyone is willing to cut you off at the slightest chance to make their lives better, it's hard to be yourself when being you means death. (because being a nobody in everbody's eyes is as good as dying. but being a somebody requires sacrifice, and a funeral to your lost self.)
he tries to break free, he does. he sings eulogies to his past self that no one but he (and they) will ever know. he creates his own opera built on sincerity and experience. but everyone falls to the system. everyone. so authenticity is traded for a sense of body. to be somebody. oh, the irony, to become someone means to lose yourself.
he thinks he's at the top, with his paper crowns and paper castles. everything is green, with lights blinding him. blinding him from the truth and from the lie. but ignorance is not always bliss and his paper dreams light up so quickly. for a second the sparks look so pretty, until he sees the ashes it leaves behind.
so he sits alone, in that cold cold cold throne. but it's what he wanted, is it not? to have it all, even if it meant losing what was important. (he knows he's disappointed, oh kaeden knows, but he doesn't know what to do about it. no, not when he refuses to look at him.)
seeking recognition amidst the fame and glory, it's hard to tell if what he wants to become is a legend. or to be wanted. (needed. loved.) because along the way, it's easy to lose track of your roots when a dandelion stands stronger against the wind than you.
but what he does know and what he does see, is weakness, plain as can be. in a world where everyone is willing to cut you off at the slightest chance to make their lives better, it's hard to be yourself when being you means death. (because being a nobody in everbody's eyes is as good as dying. but being a somebody requires sacrifice, and a funeral to your lost self.)
he tries to break free, he does. he sings eulogies to his past self that no one but he (and they) will ever know. he creates his own opera built on sincerity and experience. but everyone falls to the system. everyone. so authenticity is traded for a sense of body. to be somebody. oh, the irony, to become someone means to lose yourself.
he thinks he's at the top, with his paper crowns and paper castles. everything is green, with lights blinding him. blinding him from the truth and from the lie. but ignorance is not always bliss and his paper dreams light up so quickly. for a second the sparks look so pretty, until he sees the ashes it leaves behind.
so he sits alone, in that cold cold cold throne. but it's what he wanted, is it not? to have it all, even if it meant losing what was important. (he knows he's disappointed, oh kaeden knows, but he doesn't know what to do about it. no, not when he refuses to look at him.)
you see a boy who grew up with no love, seeking false affection / you hear a sad song sung in such a happy tune / you feel his desperation, hands clinging, asking you to stay / please stay.
timeline.
“THERE IS THE GREAT LESSON OF 'BEAUTY AND THE BEAST,’ THAT A THING MUST BE LOVED BEFORE IT IS LOVABLE.” G.K. CHESTERTON
KAEDEN'S LIFE (EXPANDED)
he is born in sunny california to two equally bright parents. instead of chocolates his parents receive a son on the fourteenth of february. life is sweet, his parents are ecstatic.
he's six years old and one weekend walking around town has him witnessing a band performing in the street. he doesn't quite understand why they're there but what he does know is that they all looked so cool whilst performing, ignoring any judging looks thrown their way and eating up all the cheers. the vocalist throws him a wink and a smile and he happily waves back. (he refuses to leave until they finished the song.)
that very day kaeden is noisier than usual, suddenly breaking out into song much to the amusement of his family. that very summer he's enrolled to voice lessons at his insistence.
growing up is sweet. his parents encourage him in his interest for singing. he joins their church's choir and sings every sunday at the 9:30am mass and he partook in various competitions that his parents and teacher cheered him on for. over the course of his childhood, he was very musically involved and it was something that made him happy.
come his highschool years, things start to get a little rocky. his grades were never top of the class, all a's genius, but he did enough to be in the top 50% rankings, which his parents were fine with. suddenly he was slipping, a few c's here an f there and things had to be discussed.
he was his parents pride and joy until he suddenly wanted to take his own path in life.
at the age of fifteen he realised he didn't want to do anything else but music. and maybe it was here that he made his first mistake (or his first decision of independence), confidently he reveals his plans to his parents at the dinner table one wednesday night.
a slap.
his cheek is throbbing and his father looks livid, hand still outstretched from having hit him. his mother sits in shock, perhaps from her husband's action or the fact that kaeden talks back for the first time. it's a mess. shouting, hitting, crying. kaeden doesn't understand why he has to give up his passion. his father doesn't understand why his son is forsaking him after all he's done.
here, the cracks started to appear and the split grew wider.
rather than succumbing to his parents' wishes, kaeden became even more vocal and disobedient. he continues learning under his vocal coach in secret and joining competitions.
at seventeen he joins a band as their vocalist. 6pence, a co-ed band with 3 guys and 2 girls. for a year and a half he performed with them for school events, one battle of the bands-esque competition and other smaller gigs. it was halfway into 2011 that he decided to quit.
in his desire to gain fame and do what he wants, kaeden was starting to get a little cocky, a little greedy. from the start he knew that their band was bound for nothing. horrible dynamics, ty original compositions, no distinct sound, and generally ty managing.
so he leaves, not before getting into an argument with the leader who had been his friend, but it didn't matter to him not when he was planning to leave for south korea.
unbeknownst to his parents, ever since his announcement of wanting a career in the entertainment industry, he's been saving up and planning to leave for south korea once he graduates.
and he does. and when his parents see him leaving out with what looked to be all his belongings in suitcases, they throw a fit and demand to know what he's planning on doing. his mother is crying again, his father still as livid. they're just older now.
maybe 3 years ago he would have felt even a bit of remorse, but after their cold and harsh treatment for simply wanting to be happy in life, he finds it hard to do so. so he leaves, telling them he'll never come back.
it's at 10:45 am that kaeden ahn leaves behind what he remembers as a sunny childhood turned dysfunctional mess. and it's at 11:03 am when he cries in his window seat because he's going to miss them, no matter what he tries to say. he's always going to love them no matter what, he just wishes they could do the same.
arriving in south korea and settling in could've gone much smoother than he hoped, but it was the best he could do with his savings. after a horribly tight ride in economy, he was just glad to be able to get all his suitcases without much pain.
he rents out a small apartment, and it's enough for now. he gets a job as a clerk at the music store a he passed by on his way to his apartment. he also receives news that he got into seoularts university as well as his scholarship about a month into living in seoul. so far, things seemed to be coming together nicely and kaeden feels ecstatic at the thought of living by himself, of making his own decisions and just... doing what he wants in life.
but things don't always go so well all the time, he has to push himself to study hard to keep his scholarship. he picks up extra shifts and he's juggling all sorts of bills. and really, he may have slightly expected this sort of difficulty, but it's much more difficult when he's actually experiencing it. except if he wants to do what he wants he has to power through. so he does.
it's at nineteen where there's an announcement of yet another one of those korean singing contests that get a lot of hype and monitoring. it seems almost like a gift from god, a chance at getting to where he wants.
he auditions and gets in. from the eliminations, to the qualifiers, to the first and second semi-finals, to the preliminaries and to the finals. it would be a lie to say he never expected to get far. he was confident in himself, had stage presence, and extremely proficient vocal ability.
first place. it was deafening, the cheers and the sound of his name being announced as winner over the sound system. he's smiling, the fans he had accumulated over the course of the show were waving their banners and cheering.
he was first place. it seemed surreal when they handed him his prize money, the trophy, and the microphone to give his acceptance speech.
about a day or two later there are already calls from entertainment labels. and really, he would've jumped at the chance to join the company of his favourite kpop groups, but somehow the world told him he was meant for better things and the contract never pushed through.
so instead of being a trainee in sment he was back to posting covers on youtube and a few original compositions. but this time there was more buzz thanks to his exposure. he quickly garnered even more subscribers and followers than before and it suddenly didn't seem so bad not to have gotten into the label he wanted. afterall, there were other fish in the sea.
then surprise surprise, he gets an email from a 'ko junwi' one day asking if he'd like to come in to audition for a band he was forming.
something in him makes him say yes.
he's six years old and one weekend walking around town has him witnessing a band performing in the street. he doesn't quite understand why they're there but what he does know is that they all looked so cool whilst performing, ignoring any judging looks thrown their way and eating up all the cheers. the vocalist throws him a wink and a smile and he happily waves back. (he refuses to leave until they finished the song.)
that very day kaeden is noisier than usual, suddenly breaking out into song much to the amusement of his family. that very summer he's enrolled to voice lessons at his insistence.
growing up is sweet. his parents encourage him in his interest for singing. he joins their church's choir and sings every sunday at the 9:30am mass and he partook in various competitions that his parents and teacher cheered him on for. over the course of his childhood, he was very musically involved and it was something that made him happy.
come his highschool years, things start to get a little rocky. his grades were never top of the class, all a's genius, but he did enough to be in the top 50% rankings, which his parents were fine with. suddenly he was slipping, a few c's here an f there and things had to be discussed.
he was his parents pride and joy until he suddenly wanted to take his own path in life.
at the age of fifteen he realised he didn't want to do anything else but music. and maybe it was here that he made his first mistake (or his first decision of independence), confidently he reveals his plans to his parents at the dinner table one wednesday night.
a slap.
his cheek is throbbing and his father looks livid, hand still outstretched from having hit him. his mother sits in shock, perhaps from her husband's action or the fact that kaeden talks back for the first time. it's a mess. shouting, hitting, crying. kaeden doesn't understand why he has to give up his passion. his father doesn't understand why his son is forsaking him after all he's done.
here, the cracks started to appear and the split grew wider.
rather than succumbing to his parents' wishes, kaeden became even more vocal and disobedient. he continues learning under his vocal coach in secret and joining competitions.
at seventeen he joins a band as their vocalist. 6pence, a co-ed band with 3 guys and 2 girls. for a year and a half he performed with them for school events, one battle of the bands-esque competition and other smaller gigs. it was halfway into 2011 that he decided to quit.
in his desire to gain fame and do what he wants, kaeden was starting to get a little cocky, a little greedy. from the start he knew that their band was bound for nothing. horrible dynamics, ty original compositions, no distinct sound, and generally ty managing.
so he leaves, not before getting into an argument with the leader who had been his friend, but it didn't matter to him not when he was planning to leave for south korea.
unbeknownst to his parents, ever since his announcement of wanting a career in the entertainment industry, he's been saving up and planning to leave for south korea once he graduates.
and he does. and when his parents see him leaving out with what looked to be all his belongings in suitcases, they throw a fit and demand to know what he's planning on doing. his mother is crying again, his father still as livid. they're just older now.
maybe 3 years ago he would have felt even a bit of remorse, but after their cold and harsh treatment for simply wanting to be happy in life, he finds it hard to do so. so he leaves, telling them he'll never come back.
it's at 10:45 am that kaeden ahn leaves behind what he remembers as a sunny childhood turned dysfunctional mess. and it's at 11:03 am when he cries in his window seat because he's going to miss them, no matter what he tries to say. he's always going to love them no matter what, he just wishes they could do the same.
arriving in south korea and settling in could've gone much smoother than he hoped, but it was the best he could do with his savings. after a horribly tight ride in economy, he was just glad to be able to get all his suitcases without much pain.
he rents out a small apartment, and it's enough for now. he gets a job as a clerk at the music store a he passed by on his way to his apartment. he also receives news that he got into seoularts university as well as his scholarship about a month into living in seoul. so far, things seemed to be coming together nicely and kaeden feels ecstatic at the thought of living by himself, of making his own decisions and just... doing what he wants in life.
but things don't always go so well all the time, he has to push himself to study hard to keep his scholarship. he picks up extra shifts and he's juggling all sorts of bills. and really, he may have slightly expected this sort of difficulty, but it's much more difficult when he's actually experiencing it. except if he wants to do what he wants he has to power through. so he does.
it's at nineteen where there's an announcement of yet another one of those korean singing contests that get a lot of hype and monitoring. it seems almost like a gift from god, a chance at getting to where he wants.
he auditions and gets in. from the eliminations, to the qualifiers, to the first and second semi-finals, to the preliminaries and to the finals. it would be a lie to say he never expected to get far. he was confident in himself, had stage presence, and extremely proficient vocal ability.
first place. it was deafening, the cheers and the sound of his name being announced as winner over the sound system. he's smiling, the fans he had accumulated over the course of the show were waving their banners and cheering.
he was first place. it seemed surreal when they handed him his prize money, the trophy, and the microphone to give his acceptance speech.
about a day or two later there are already calls from entertainment labels. and really, he would've jumped at the chance to join the company of his favourite kpop groups, but somehow the world told him he was meant for better things and the contract never pushed through.
so instead of being a trainee in sment he was back to posting covers on youtube and a few original compositions. but this time there was more buzz thanks to his exposure. he quickly garnered even more subscribers and followers than before and it suddenly didn't seem so bad not to have gotten into the label he wanted. afterall, there were other fish in the sea.
then surprise surprise, he gets an email from a 'ko junwi' one day asking if he'd like to come in to audition for a band he was forming.
something in him makes him say yes.
STEP TWO.
faceclaim. park yury (model)
backup fc. ryu sanghee (model), shin jaehyuk (model)
height. 178 cm
weight. 58 kg
appearance. lean with a mash of class and something wild. effortlessly attractive (or perhaps effortfully dressed up), he calls attention in a way that makes you want to keep looking. his proportions are perfect in a way that he knows how to use. not too long to be awkward, not too short to be too cute. he's masculine, but soft. he's... flexible and it's captivating the way he seems to be able to. he sweeps his black hair away from his eyes. then he notices. he winks, you're intrigued. (or perhaps you turn away, and his shoulders slump just a hint but he quickly turns away himself, off to find someone else to play with.)
fashion.
sometimes it's plain, sometimes it's not. sometimes he looks like a million bucks. sometimes he tries, sometimes he does not. but really, it doesn't matter. he looks good in whatever he wears.
KEYWORDS. inspiration from driagaru's app
#coats #leather (#leatherjackets) #winter #musicfestivals #sleevelessshirts #black #white #neutralcolors #accentcolors #denim #boots #sneakers #sweaters #longsleeves #semi-formal #over-priced #fauxfur #richkidlook #boyvibes #skinnyjeans #rippedjeans #rings (#nosering) #earrings #chokers
STEP FIVE.
relationships.
MOTHER & FATHER
kang jinhee & ahn kyunghwan, erased
YOU HELD ME SO TIGHTLY ONLY TO PUSH ME AWAY
YOU HELD ME SO TIGHTLY ONLY TO PUSH ME AWAY
his biggest supporters. until suddenly they were not. despite encouraging him throughout his childhood, it didn't really mean much in the end when what they really wanted for him involved 9 to 5 work hours and stifling suits and ties. and maybe it wasn't really support but a way to brag about their son to their many other friends who had seemingly better lives. and maybe it was their constant cookie cutter demands that led to kaeden severing ties with his parents.
it's lonely, he's accepted it. but he'd rather pursue what he loves than go back someplace where he's forced into a mold. he is soft, but he is not malleable.
it's lonely, he's accepted it. but he'd rather pursue what he loves than go back someplace where he's forced into a mold. he is soft, but he is not malleable.
KO JUNWI
creative director, crush, something close to love hah, what is love?
WON'T YOU TAKE MY HAND, WON'T YOU HOLD IT TIGHT
WON'T YOU TAKE MY HAND, WON'T YOU HOLD IT TIGHT
kaeden has always said that his reason for jumping at the chance of being part of ngsy was solely his love for music (and desire for fame). but he's never admitted that it was in part due to junwi's presence. he's no romantic (or perhaps, maybe a little) but he was rather star stricken when he first met the elder. he's always been a er for the dark, snarky type and kaeden fell badly.
whether it's genuine interest or a deep rooted desire for validation from figures he holds in high regard yet seem to give him little of it, kaeden is rather enamoured with the creative director. generally, he acts the same as he does with the others, playful and a little flirtatious. but sometimes he'll try to put in a little more effort, a little more work, all for the sake of possibly hearing some praise.
dammit junwi, why don't you notice him?
whether it's genuine interest or a deep rooted desire for validation from figures he holds in high regard yet seem to give him little of it, kaeden is rather enamoured with the creative director. generally, he acts the same as he does with the others, playful and a little flirtatious. but sometimes he'll try to put in a little more effort, a little more work, all for the sake of possibly hearing some praise.
dammit junwi, why don't you notice him?
HWANG ISANG
band member, a threat (?), avoidance
YOU'RE NOT BAD, REALLY. (I JUST DON'T LIKE YOU.)
YOU'RE NOT BAD, REALLY. (I JUST DON'T LIKE YOU.)
maybe it was because of how popular isang seemed to be. maybe it was because he was taller, seemed more perfect. maybe it was because junwi seemed to genuinely like the kid, or maybe it was because kaeden needs validation and seeing someone else be better at him in the things he thought he was best at took a blow to his already pretty rocky self-esteem.
he doesn't like him. no, not one bit. it's a mix of jealousy and hatred that has him trying to subtly one up isang. other times, he avoids him. he tries not to be obvious, generally acting decently towards him but never as friendly as he would with the others. but it's as far as he can go. any more and he might tear his hair out.
(and maybe he can't stand the fact that there's another pretty boy he has to share the spotlight with. but he clenches his fist instead, flashes his million dollar smile and tries to drown himself in those thousands of voices screaming his name. even if there's only one person he'd want to hear pat his head, and tell him 'good job, pretty boy.')
he doesn't like him. no, not one bit. it's a mix of jealousy and hatred that has him trying to subtly one up isang. other times, he avoids him. he tries not to be obvious, generally acting decently towards him but never as friendly as he would with the others. but it's as far as he can go. any more and he might tear his hair out.
(and maybe he can't stand the fact that there's another pretty boy he has to share the spotlight with. but he clenches his fist instead, flashes his million dollar smile and tries to drown himself in those thousands of voices screaming his name. even if there's only one person he'd want to hear pat his head, and tell him 'good job, pretty boy.')
LOVE INTEREST. open for (male) love interest?
kaeden's had his fair share of relationships. most of them were with girls back in the states with guy flings in secret. but once he came to korea, he had hookups with those of any gender identity.
he may seem like the type to play around, maybe even get around, but he tries soothing wounds with short-term pleasure even though what he really needs is a long-lasting relief. constancy, care, he needs someone who can put up with him and see past what he tries to be, and understand what he really is and wants.
though he says his type is dark, brooding, perhaps a little sarcastic, the one that will win him in the end is the kind of person who can take care of him and give him all the affection wants.
he may seem like the type to play around, maybe even get around, but he tries soothing wounds with short-term pleasure even though what he really needs is a long-lasting relief. constancy, care, he needs someone who can put up with him and see past what he tries to be, and understand what he really is and wants.
though he says his type is dark, brooding, perhaps a little sarcastic, the one that will win him in the end is the kind of person who can take care of him and give him all the affection wants.
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